Tag Archive | Werewolves

The war beneath our streets: Underworld (2003)

I’m not sure this series is a good idea at all, to be honest. Still, I have recently rewatched them, and it is an 18 rated horror franchise, so I suppose it does fit my MO. Underworld is, on paper, a really great idea for a schlock series. It should, actually, be solid gold dumbhouse. A battle raging below the streets between two underground armies of Vampires and Werewolves should automatically be both incredibly cool and highly entertaining, and should promise blood by the barrel, tits, horror, graphic violence and a lead actress strapped into something ridiculously skin tight. Sadly, Underworld mostly wastes this premise, and all they manage to get right is spraying a catsuit onto Kate Beckinsale.

May contain a bemused cast of British Thespians and spoilers below

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Blood And Chocolate (2007)

Director: Katja Von Garnier

Starring: Agnes Bruckner, Hugh Dancy, Olivier Martinez

Release date: January 26 (US). Oooh, wolves, here we go! Never heard of it but that might be a good sign, right? I’m also painfully aware the Rude Gorilla is on a hat-trick. May contain wereponces and spoilers…

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Post Millennial Trauma Part 3: Dog Soldiers (2002)

I do seem to be doing a lot of werewolf movies recently.

I’ve been a while between reviews in this series, and the reason being that I could not for the life of me think of a film for 2002. In the end it came down to a choice between My Little Eye (an interesting and quite gripping take on Big Brother) and this, Neil Marshall’s debut film. To be honest, I don’t really know what I was thinking about, as Dog Soldiers is not only far superior to My Little Eye, but also an exhilarating and barnstorming take on the Werewolf mythos, whereas My Little Eye is a good film, and a severely underrated one, but is never going to be labelled great.

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Jarv’s Schlock Vault: War Wolves

It’s only the alcohol that stops me tearing you all apart

Jarv’s Rating: 1 Chang- This is a shit effort.

The Sci-Fi Channel are a fucking enigma. They are so serially incompetent that I find it astounding that they manage to make any money whatsoever. Occasionally, they do manage to bang something good out (usually more through luck than judgement) such as Mammoth, Infestation or Pandorum, but most of the time their less than stellar efforts fail to even reach the dizzy heights of mediocre (Frankenfish), instead wallowing in their own filth and offending the viewer with their ineptitude (Minotaur). This is one of the latter. Read More…

A unbiased Man’s look at The Twilight Saga: New Moon

        Let me preface this by saying I am just reviewing this movie based souly on the two movies alone. I am leaving out all the hype and books, it’s a movie it should be able to stand on its own outside of fandom and whatever it is based on.  With that said, lets us begin….

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