Tag Archive | David Payne

Jarv’s Schlock Vault: No Man’s Land: The Rise of Reeker

I once stole money from a quadriplegic because I needed shoes

This is a turn up for the books, and I’m not joking here. Ordinarily, a DTV slasher sequel has basically one of two ways to go: it can either produce a lame facsimile of the first film, or it can completely ignore it and throw something truly bugnuts out into the world. The latter is probably the better way to go, and when successful can throw up some absolutely hilarious efforts such as the two Prom Night Mary Lou efforts. David Payne, however, when returning to Reeker in 2008 thought he’d try his hand at something slightly different, and, I have to say, that I’m truly impressed at the final result, because Reeker 2 (I’m not typing the whole title out every time) is far far better than it has any right to be.

Absolutely contains stinking fucking spoilers to both this and the first film below.

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Jarv’s Schlock Vault: Reeker

I’m afraid of psycho desert crackheads who hunt small animals with Dahmer’s garden tools.

Occasionally on my wanders through the dregs of cinema, I come  across an idea so monstrously ill-conceived and completely insane that it literally makes me pause the film, go and get a beer, and attempt to drink said beer while debating the merits of said idea. In the  case of Reeker, this idea is so, so preposterously bad that I’m almost at a loss for words, because I cannot in the life of me (outside of Shrooms) think of another film that intentionally uses a device as massively, inordinately, unbelievably stupid as this one. Someone really needs to sit director David Payne down and just ask him a very simple question:

“What the fuck were you playing at, and why in the name of everything sacred and holy did you think this was a good idea?” Read More…