Burt Gummer’s Rec Room

A gathering place for paranoid survivalists and those who worship at the Church of Chang

August 2015: Dryer than a bone, and hotter than the surface of the sun- yup, it’s summertime in Perfection and El Blanco is on the prowl.

Disclaimer: This is the part of the Church that is the most no holds barred. None of it is intended with malice, and although it can on occasion seem a little bit fraught, it is banter rather than venom. So, be warned that this is like taking a naked swim in a piranha tank and not recommended for the faint of heart.

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9,151 responses to “Burt Gummer’s Rec Room”

  1. M. Blitz says :

    I’ve been reading an oral history of illegal abortion pre-Roe. Man, HBO should make a miniseries out of that. And I hope somebody is out there collecting more of these stories. Reading them is like being stabbed over and over again. The ones told by the children of women who died are especially brutal. People who were little kids and whose mothers loved them and they remember their young, beautiful mothers, dead, and the way their lives were changed. And how fucking needless it was.

    • Just Pillow Talk says :

      A soon-to-be current documentary could be done at this rate….

    • Just Pillow Talk says :

      A soon-to-be current documentary could be done at this rate….

      • M. Blitz says :

        Dude….i can only hope that the fetal personhood angle opens up too big a can of worms to be feasible to scotus, but i dont have any faith. Have a range of plans for various contingencies in terms of how to be of practical service. Fuck, it really cannot come to that.

    • Xiphos0311 says :

      light bed time reading?

      • M. Blitz says :

        Tbh my “light” reading lately is Brexit news. Dark comedy, but still comic relief somehow.

      • Jarv says :

        Ain’t nothing funny about it. We need a revolution so badly. I legitimately pray for a friendly asteroid to take out the House of Commons.

      • M. Blitz says :

        Darkest of comedies from over here, truly grim. Like when you accidentally burst out laughing at some awful moment at a funeral. I cant believe any UK politicians can even show their faces in public at this point. Shocking shit.

      • Jarv says :

        They’re even more hated at the moment than they were when they were caught in the expenses scandal. The whole fucking thing is an embarrassing mess. I voted remain, but accept that my side lost. Quite why they keep torpedoing May’s Withdrawal Agreement (which was honestly better than I thought she was going to do) is a total mystery.

        The bunch of parasitical fucks are trying to just fuck things up to make a “name for themselves. Half of them aren’t even household names at home.

        We’re going to get PM Boris, and I’ll die of embarrassment.

      • M. Blitz says :

        It was a farce from the beginning. A simple majority for something so momentous? Insane. The tories are slime. Labour’s pathetic and utterly allergic to power it would seem. Truly, all involved should have gotten acquainted with reality years ago. And by now, they should all be in hiding. May’s bargaining had also been darkly comic to behold from afar. From my limited know-little perspective. I find it staggering that there’s been no 2nd referendum.

        PM Boris would be supremely embarrassing. It’s an embarrassing world these days. A lot of shit just is not functioning along workable/reasomable lines.

      • Jarv says :

        It was such a fuckup. Cameron legitimately thought the country would vote to stay in the EU as a Good Thing because almost all politicians told us it was a Good Thing. Thus, it didn’t need a sensible majority.

        However, what the stupid twat completely underestimated was that at this point we’d been on 6 years of Austerity due to bankers and whatnot and the public at large are Deeply Fucked Off with our ruling class.

        So, the great British Public decided to give them a black eye.

        Cameron, however, had been so confident he said that what was an advisory referendum was binding for reasons that are a complete mystery- our political system doesn’t work like that.

        The prick then resigned. Literally leaving others to clean up his mess.

        Anyhoo, that shouldn’t really have mattered. Except the Tories were in a total mess. May became PM by being literally the least vile option.

        Luckily for her, Labour decided to be all Democratic, and in (another) howl of rage and unhappiness their members voted in stuffed cardigan allotment dweller Jeremy Fucking Corbyn,

        This, in theory (and reality) made Labour unelectable. They’ve tried to oust him about 8 times but keep fucking it up. Literally nobody in the UK wants PM Corbyn- I’d honestly rather have a potato.

        May, seeing this, thinks she’s got the opportunity to wipe Labour out for a decade- but completely forgets that the country is still a mess of simmering resentment and (this is the important bit) fucking hates her and the Tories. So calls a general election. And then proceeds to run the worst campaign in living memory. The only one that’s a contender was Hilary Clinton for President.

        To the surprise of absolutely nobody, the Tories lose their majority. Forcing May to go cap in hand to those inbred extremists in Northern Ireland.

        This then fucks Brexit.

        As to the various arseholes she’s appointed to lead the negotiation- the worst of which is Davies, although that cunt that didn’t know we’re an island comes a close second- the less said about them the better.

        So despite all this, she STILL managed to get a withdrawal agreement where we pay significantly less than everyone expected, there’s a mechanism to ensure that we don’t go back to the troubles, and freedom of movement is ended. And the cunts refuse to vote for it. Because reasons.

        What’s painful is that all the bleating about Customs Unions and the rest of it AREN’T RELEVANT TO THE WITHDRAWAL AGREEMENT. All this shit is for the negotiations covering trade and shit that are meant to take place in the next two years.

      • M. Blitz says :

        Yesssss, years of austerity and hot on the heels of the whole debacle in Greece. And then here’s an opportunity to give a massive FUCK YOU to a bunch of German bankers. But….as satisfying as it feels to scream fuck you, and it certainly is a pleasure….the UK isnt Greece. Y’all still have your own currency. And perhaps more power in the EU than out. Arghhh. Just a perfect storm of ego, incompetence, rage, circumstance, timing, prejudice, bluster. Truly a farce for the ages. Corbyn depresses the fuck out of me. Such a disappointment. He manages to combine wishy-washy-ness with stubborn will in the most blandly impotent fashion. I can barely stand to look at him he’s such a disappointment.

      • Jarv says :

        He’s not a disappointment. This is what he’s always been. Anyone who thought he was going to be anything other than a misplaced mildly creepy anthropology lecturer from a shit poly was deluding themselves.

      • Jarv says :

        There’s lots wrong with the EU as an institution. However, having said that, it’s nuts to want to sign out of a massive free trade area where all our major exports go.

        People were just fucked off with the Establishment.

      • M. Blitz says :

        “misplaced mildly creepy anthropology lecturer”

        That made me lol
        God, it really does kind of sum it up.

      • Jarv says :

        Honestly, he’s thick as fuck, has never had an actual job, didn’t get any A-levels, has basically never left North London.

        And this is the leader of Her Majesty’s Opposition.

        Fucking marvelous.

        My old man thinks he’s a commie who wouldn’t press the nuclear button (as if anyone in the UK gives a shit about that), but he’s not even a commie. He’s just a vaguely left-leaning dickhead who never saw a shit cause he didn’t want to latch on to.

        And I wasn’t joking about the Allotment.

      • M. Blitz says :

        How is he still in charge of Labour? I find it rather baffling.

        The “left” in general these days I find baffling. It kind of fuels a bit of paranoia in me at times….is it really possible to be SO spectacularly bad at politics? Without trying, without an ulterior motive?

      • Jarv says :

        Because there are no alternatives popular enough to unseat him. The last one they tried was some failed management consultant with the charisma of overcooked broccoli. As long as any Labour Member can vote, and the front bench is stuffed full of Blairites, he’ll cling on.

        Despite the fact that he is probably the single worst candidate for PM they could put out

      • M. Blitz says :

        “Failed management consultant”

        See and this is where I break down laughing again. I’m not sure I can recall a situation that was so utterly fucked from every conceivable angle. Every facet another bit of fuckery. Boggles my mind.

      • Jarv says :

        It’s the result of the political career path that appeared in the UK in the 80’s. Around that point, PPE’s started being offered at Oxbridge. As soon as that happened there were thousands of academic high achievers with a degree that’s “a bit of this, a bit of that, and a bit of the other” that’s fuck all use to anyone. All these pricks were legitimately qualified for is as a lobbyist/ wonky think tank lowlife. The career path once you do this is then politics all the way, and if you show enough party loyalty you’ll eventually get a safe seat when the incumbent dies.

        And that’s how you end up with our current ruling class.

    • tombando says :

      Yeah Georgia and Bama and Missouri are doing double duty in the shitstorm end of things. Not impressed at all. They deserve to bave boycotts thrown at them. Not that it will do much. But its the thought that counts.

      As for the Brexit-I’ve been WFT since it all happened–this is NOT something you leave up to a fucking Referendum FFS. It’s not. Hey Texas wants to turn itself into 6 states WHEEE so you get 6 states and straighter family trees from. FFS again. Jarv I’m flatout astonished. And the Cornyn dude there-whatever his name is–sounds like a fuckwad of a the Highest order. I thought we had the monopoly over here. Boris Dipshit as your new PM? Egads……Cue the benny hill music.

  2. Jarv says :

    Recent viewing:

    All of Archer.

    If you haven’t seen this, I thoroughly recommend it. It flirts with genius on occasion. The later series get a bit more ragged, but up to then there’s some absolutely fucking hilarious stuff in it.

    I can’t believe I didn’t know it existed.

    Up to date with iZombie and the 99.

    Both are good. I’m glad this is the last series of iZombie, as it’s clearly running out of material. Major is almost totally unrecognisable from the early years.

    The 99 on the other hand needs to keep going. It’s still brilliant.

    • Xiphos0311 says :

      Archer, the earlier spy-centric years, were better and more consistently funny then the latter specialty iterations are. That being said current Archer is still entertaining but in a more amusing then laugh out loud way like the older version.

      • Jarv says :

        Having binge watched all 9 seasons the choob, I legitimately rate Archer Vice as the best series (5). However, Archer Vice opened the door to what followed, The PI series (7) was OK, and at least made sense for a former intelligence agency, with a contender for funniest episode of the entire run. 8 (dreamland) was cool, but not that funny. 9 was funny, but not that cool, if that makes sense.

        There’s probably only 2 or 3 bad episodes in the whole run and they’re all in the later years.

      • Jarv says :

        Having checked- both the shit episode that leapt to mind (Area 51 and the Welsh one, although the Welsh one was nowhere near as bad) are in Series 6.

        The problem nowadays is that they don’t know what to do with Lana.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        I agree there aren’t that many bad episodes in the run.

      • Jarv says :

        It helps that they’re only 20mins long, so they tend to be tight as fuck.

      • Jarv says :

        I fucking hate Barry now, by the way. He was really funny up to a point, but I NEVER want to see him in Archer again. Cheryl and Pam are also being overused.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        I like Pam she cracks me up. The funniest bits tend to be between Archer and Mallory or The NAZI doctor who’s name I am blanking on or Ray.

      • Jarv says :

        I think it’s because I binged it, but Pam being second lead instead of Lana in Danger Island really overexposes her. She was fucking great in Dreamland, though. Kreiger is the doctor. I also love Ray.

      • Jarv says :

        The single bit of the series that made me laugh the hardest was when Lana caught Figgis sodomising Barry’s fiancee in the series 2. The exchange between her and Archer in the car afterwards was absolute gold.

        They then followed it in the next episode by Lana totally humiliating Cyril.

        Took me a while to realise that Cyril also voices Jerry in Rick and Morty- and it’s basically the same weasel character.

    • Xiphos0311 says :

      I was a bit disappointed in the first two episodes of IZombie but they got back on track with the third episode.

      B99 feels a little off to me like they are trying to introduce the show to a new audience or something because of the network switch. I can’t quite nail down why it feels different so I am going with that.

      • Jarv says :

        First 2 episodes of iZombie really felt like they were spinning the wheels and not going anywhere. The third one was killer though.

        With the 99, it’s that the dynamic’s changed without Gina. I think. But it’s still great.

      • Jarv says :

        Forgot, also watched all of Lucifer. Vast improvement on the previous series.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        IZombie was doing way too much table setting and not enough story progression but they got on track so all’s well in Zombie Seattle land.

        I was glad to see Gina go. The character was getting too ridiculously out there for me.

        Lucifer was fantastic. I hope they bring Eve back if they get another season she was a great addition. I wasn’t liking her at first but then the writing improved tremendously and the actress sold they hell out of it. the fight choreography was tremendous this season. The bar fight in particular especially the employees in the background.

      • Jarv says :

        All of that. It’s really benefited from going to Netflix. The series feels tighter as well in a smaller run. My only complaint is that I think they mangled detective Douche.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        I think most shows benefit from a shorter run, unless you are a show set in a fantasy world with flying nuclear weapons and women’s mammaries.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        I think they are trying to rehab Detective Douche but why? Dude was great at being a jackass. plus I laugh out loud whenever Lucifer calls him Detective Douche.

      • Jarv says :

        That’s what I didn’t get. And him pouting for a season wasn’t great

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        no it wasn’t. However he did get with the smoke show that is Ella so I don’t feel bad for the lucky bastard.

      • Jarv says :

        Forgot that.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        Ella and Eve together and separately were some of the funniest parts of the season. When they were both rolling on Molly was comedy gold.

      • Jarv says :

        Also liked maze being used more

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        Yeah her entire arc was well handled but they managed to still keep her true to her violent base line as a demon.

      • Judge Droid says :

        B99 s6 overall has been okay. But there were a couple of awkwardly terrible episodes. Especially the one where they attempt to tackle #metoo. That was uncomfortable to watch, and not in the way they intended. Whenever the show gets overtly political, it loses what makes it particularly good. The s5 ep where Terry is stopped by a cop in his own neighbourhood for no good reason for instance. A positive message, but the show can be clunky and awkward.

      • Jarv says :

        Especially the one where they attempt to tackle #metoo

        That was dire. I’d forgotten (repressed) it. You’re right, it was comparable to the racism one.

      • Judge Droid says :

        Yep. Otherwise its a consistently funny show. Braugher especially is hilarious.

      • Jarv says :

        THE PINEAPPLE IS CLEARLY THE SLUT.

      • Judge Droid says :

        L is sold out. Not much more needs to be said, really.

      • Jarv says :

        Given it’s on sale in America, I’m mostly surprised that all the sizes above L aren’t sold out.

        (I totally want one)

      • Judge Droid says :

        Heh. True. And true.

      • Jarv says :

        I’m quite impressed that all of Holt’s tasteful shirts from that episode are bestsellers.

  3. Jarv says :

    In totally unrelated news, got fucked over by my workplace for a promotion that I should have had- they’ve hired a PR woman instead of putting me up. I know PR is probably my biggest weakness, but they’ve basically demoted me. (Same title, same salary, all good stuff gone). I’m off to meet with my headhunter now cos I need out of here as a result.

    Got down to the last two as well. Felt like a proper slap in the face.

    • Xiphos0311 says :

      Also in the entirely unrelated news category I will be retiring from the Marine Corps on 3 July. So begins my independence day. I start terminal leave 1 June.

      • Jarv says :

        Congrats. Where to next?

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        Oh I forgot thank you.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        not sure. I have some interviews set up and I have a couple of handy man jobs and carpentry work. So I will get it sorted out eventually. for a bit i think I am just going to sort of wander about and take it easy.

      • Jarv says :

        You Jack Reacher-ing it, without being a homeless bum?

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        I considered that option but no I have a place. and a pension. Still it is appealing on a certain level. I could do it I can almost fit everything i own into a midsize automobile.

      • Just Pillow Talk says :

        Whoa, congrats, how many years in?

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        Thanks Pillow. All together between active duty Army, Army reserve while at university and The Marnie Corps nearly 30 years.

      • Jarv says :

        Doesn’t Reacher have a pension? It’s got a kind of romantic allure to it (not the living like a bum bit, the travelling at your own speed bit)

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        I don’t think so because he didn’t do a full 20. I do think he might get a some medical discharge money. he did get money from his brother’s passing and some other mumbo jumbo I don’t remember Plus his expenses are not too much so he doesn’t need a lot of money.

      • Jarv says :

        I’m sure he gets regular money deposited somewhere (from the books). He did get a big payoff from his brother dying. Meh, though- that’ll hardly be the only dumb and inconsistent with reality thing in there (sniper contest still leaping to mind)

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        are you trying to push my buttons with that sniper contest? Seriously that one makes me angry because of the stpidit of it. The other one that chaps my ass is that Reacher is the one that chose the Neretta M9 as the side arm for the Armed services. One lowly MP captain by himself. Its not like the Army doesn’t have a thing called The Ordnance Corps WHO’S JOB IT IS TO TEST AND APPROVE THESE THINGS. Oh wait they do have that.

      • Jarv says :

        There are bits that get me too- the one with Hook Hobie and the guy having to get naked because he owed Hook some money and that’s an entirely normal thing to do with a creditor?

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        Since the author is English he mistakenly thinks terms used in the UK Army are interchangeable with the US Army. They aren’t and I know this personal experience.
        One of the funnier ones was in an early book he used the term ‘squaddie” Which is only used in In the UK, Australia and to a lesser extent Canada. When I reread the book that was a later edition then the first one, somebody wised up and took out the word squaddie.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        You don’t nude up with your banker? Fucking repressed British banking system.

      • Jarv says :

        Or the entirely made up suicide bomber protocols on New York’s subway.

      • Jarv says :

        It’s not that he’s English that’s the problem. It’s that he’s a fucking lazy PR hack- literally 2 minutes of research on any subject he fucks up is all that’s required. And Reacher doesn’t need to be fucking Superman, anyway.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        I wish he would do some fucking research. If he did he would learn that you can’t hit shit with an un-zeroed scope. Especially at long distance. Not to mention not knowing anything about the load weights, rifle tendencies or doing the math. Technical shooting is math and some physics it isn’t fucking magic its math.

      • Judge Droid says :

        Congratulations on your retirement from the Marine Corps!

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        Thank you Blitz I appreciate it.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        Thank you Droid.

  4. Judge Droid says :

    Jarv, what’s the general vibe over there with the Cricket World Cup? It’s kind of snuck up on me. It’s very low key over here. Only this week I’ve started paying attention. I reckon the Poms stand a chance this time. Aussies are okay. Really depends on the sandpaper duo. If Smith and Warner can fire, then we’re in it.

    • Jarv says :

      It’s not been well publicised, and the format is stupid. But the feeling is one of quiet confidence. We’ve never had a one day side like this one (they’re fucking incredible in terms of batting).

      However, the test side is such an abject disgrace, and we’re conditioned to them being shit so we’re not really understanding how they seem to be actually good.

      I think it’s between us and India. The pitches are going to be roads, because our bowling is OK but not earth shattering (unlike the batting), which really negates Australia’s main strength. I don’t think any of the Australian batsmen, including the sandpaper bros, would get in our side at the moment, which is weird. (I’d take three of the Aussie bowlers though).

      We were able to fire Hales for taking Coke recreationally and not miss him- he’d get in most sides.

      • Judge Droid says :

        Hmmm… I work with an Indian guy and he told me that he doesn’t think they’ll do that well. He may be hedging, of course.

      • Jarv says :

        I think they’ll do well, because I think we’ll prepare roads as our bowling is mostly mediocre. They’re potentially a frightening line up- and they won the last tourney we held. However, their bowling is probably worse than ours, and they have a few players who either aren’t that good (Sharma) or are blatantly over the hill (Dhoni).

        The dark horse is probably Pakistan. We just marmalised them 4-0, but they have some classy players- good bowling and batting- and if they fire they could do it.

        Course, you can never count Australia out.

      • Judge Droid says :

        Why, all of a sudden, are your pitches roads? That’s been the one defining, annoying factor about English pitches. They were doctored.

      • Jarv says :

        They were doctored.

        We’ve never doctored pitches any more than any other nation does. It’s not like we produce raging bunsens (india), or total puddings (Windies). Most of the shit that gets called doctored is due to the atmosphere and the ball that we insist on using cos tradition (not because it swings more, not at all).

        But each one used to have its own character because of conditions in the soil and the air- Headlingly used to swing (this ended when they put that stand up that changed the atmosphere in the middle. Nice one, morons), Old trafford was true and took a bit of spin, but was basically guaranteed to be rained off. Trent Bridge seamed. Edgbasten was an absolute brute, the Oval was a road (always the last test so dry as fuck), Lords has the hill, but has severe drainage issues, so needs relaying every 7 years or it’s a road. Cardiff shouldn’t be a venue, but if it is, it’s always been a slow, damp, turner.

        But the ECB in their wisdom decided that this was handicapping our players so started making them all use the same turf- all from Surrey- to make them more consistent. What then happened is that Trent Bridge is now a road, Headingly got fucked by the stand, Old Trafford is a terrible pitch now and so on.

        If it’s not overcast, the pitches give no help to the bowler.

      • Jarv says :

        Also, if you go a bit back before covered pitches and the heavy roller, our test venues were actively fucking dangerous. They weren’t as quick as the ones in Australia or South Africa, but the movement used to be ludicrously exaggerated. Shit bowlers like Alderman or any of the legions of medium pace seamers we churn out in the counties could take fist fulls of wickets by duty of a bit of seam movement and ludicrous late swing.

        We should go back to this- to be honest. They’re all too Batsman friendly nowadays. I like a horrible pitch.

      • Judge Droid says :

        Primary example… Freddie Flintoff!

      • Jarv says :

        Ha! No, Freddie was a good containing bowler, and not really that type. James Anderson is a better example. Or Chris Woakes. Not particularly fast, fuck all use outside of England, but takes shitloads at home.

        Same reason as why our openers have crap records compared to anyone else.

      • Jarv says :

        Also, while I’m on ECB idiocy, the Test timetable has been fucked around cos ODI’s and hit n’ giggle make more money, so they now cram them in in May or well into September. And it’s always some poor lot like Sri Lanka that get absolutely wrecked when the ball is swinging round corners, while the Aussies get to play in late summer on baked grounds without a cloud in the sky….

        Wonder why that is.

      • Judge Droid says :

        That’s disappointing to hear. So you’ve basically turned into Australia. Our pitches are especially dogshit flat these days. It’s all about getting those tests to go 5 days. Attendance and tv. #moneymoneymoneymoney

      • Jarv says :

        Basically. The weather can still change things one of two ways (rained off, or it’ll hoop round corners), but basically expect roads. It’s improved in recent years and we’re getting results again, but particularly for one-dayers expect to see lots of this sort of drivel:

        https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/cricket/44539728

      • Jarv says :

        Incidentally, the second highest ODI score ever recorded was also at Trent Bridge. Tells you all you need to know about that ground.

      • Judge Droid says :

        Yeah. This is what I was crapping on about in my convo with the workmate. I hate T20 and I’m beginning to hate One Dayers. They’re stupidly unbalanced, favouring batting and high scores. One dayers peaked with that match that SA chased down the 430 that Australia put on. Now 400 is standard. It’s boring. Test cricket is the one true form of cricket (for me). I like one day, but it’s just not as entertaining as it used to be.

      • Jarv says :

        I honestly don’t want to see bowlers going for 7 an over taking one wicket being described as having bowled well. It’s not their fault, but really.

        Tests all the way for me- provided we go back to producing actual pitches that give the bowlers *something*.

      • Judge Droid says :

        I’m quoting my workmate, but “t20 bowlers are celebrated for dot balls”.
        That is INSANE!!!

      • Jarv says :

        Forfuckssakes.

      • Jarv says :

        Also a lot of these dot balls are because the batsman has swung and missed. It’s not good bowling.

        While we’re on this, a top edge should not be going for 6, and this should not be a good thing

      • Judge Droid says :

        It’s why I don’t watch t20. If a batsman edges the ball, it generally means it’s a good delivery and a bad shot. Cricket isn’t if a batsman doesn’t score or get out then the bowler has bowled well. You can get 4 dot balls in an over, but if those other 2 balls are a 4 and a 6 then you’ve gone for 10 and that’s shit.

      • Jarv says :

        It’s even worse. We’re doing that 100 nonsense this year.

      • Judge Droid says :

        Attention span will soon demand 12 ball cricket. They’ll convince themselves that the extra over shit in t20 is the most entertaining part so they’ll bin the rest.

        Test cricket, yo!

      • Jarv says :

        Fucking depressing.

      • Jarv says :

        Actually, this legit makes me sad. My boy is going to grow up with no exposure to test cricket.

      • Judge Droid says :

        To draw from the well, i also talked about this with my workmate… Ashes, Australia v India, India v Pakistan, India v South Africa etc. The importance of rivalries in test cricket is hugely important. We particularly need the Windies to get good.

      • Judge Droid says :

        Maybe if England stopped accepting any old Saffa they could start a rivalry!

      • Jarv says :

        Pfft. Well take anyone.

      • Jarv says :

        Right so England v Australia. Australia’s batting is, frankly, shit. But England have managed to get two injuries to bowlers. Pretty crap game so far.

      • Jarv says :

        The crims looking at 300-320. That’s not enough in this day and age. I hate writing that.

      • Jarv says :

        What’s worse about this is that England are resting their two best ODI bowlers.

      • Jarv says :

        I’ll watch t20 in the pub or something but I won’t go out of my way.

        Also- the state of modern limited overs pitches and bowling explains why so many batsmen are utter shit when the ball either swings or spins. They aren’t used to it.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        Sons a bitches!

      • Jarv says :

        Meh. This shit is getting in the way of the Ashes. And Australia have picked a pair of cheating cunts.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        The sandpaper boys?

      • Jarv says :

        That’s them. One of the cheating cunts has played well. They’re getting shit from the crowd.

      • Jarv says :

        The Guardian trying to take the moral high ground about the crowd booing the cheat.

        Fuck that. We’re at home- he should be booed.

      • Jarv says :

        Blow me down. Cheating cunt walks. Staggered at that. What a fucking hypocrite.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        Why sholdn’t the home crows boo? it should be expected!

      • Jarv says :

        Yes. We should. They should get a barrage of constant shit.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        yeah no kidding.

      • Judge Droid says :

        They did admit to it (which other countries would not do) and they served a year suspension. They did the crime and the time. I get that it’s ammo for the barmy army but really, give them a bit of a break.

      • Jarv says :

        No. They attempted to cover it up, repeatedly, and then eventually ran out of excuses. Given the treatment touring sides get down under with far less cause, I have no sympathy.

      • Jarv says :

        It also doesn’t help that smiths aussie side have been sanctimonious hypocrites with “hard but fair” shit for ages before they came undone.

      • Jarv says :

        Also. I can’t help but think of the treatment broad gets in Australia.

      • Jarv says :

        I’d love to know why were persisting with Vince. He’s absolute garbage

      • Jarv says :

        Because we’re resting Morgan, Root and a few others. And Hales got himself banned for coke. The twat.

      • Judge Droid says :

        They really didn’t. As soon as it was raised they admitted it. They made an idiotic, embarrassing mistake that in the grand scheme of things means absolute fuck all. They were suspended, humiliated, lost money and respect and now deserve a go at coming back. Good luck to them, I say.
        Touring sides here don’t cop any where the shit they do in England, and by English spectators. Cause the Poms sit around and come up with songs. You know, hilarious songs. Those ones.

      • Jarv says :

        No they didn’t. There was all that shit about “tape” and other bollocks before they eventually admitted it.

        You must be joking about the crowds in Australia- the Gabba is notorious. The shit Broad in particular took was insane.

        The songs are wank and unfunny though.

        I should add the caveat that the worst are probably India with burning effigies and shit.

      • Jarv says :

        And it wasn’t a mistake. I actually wonder how long they’d been doing it since Starc’s inexplicably lost the ability to reverse swing since they got banned.

      • Jarv says :

        Aussies bowling very well.

      • Jarv says :

        At the risk of totally jinx this- this could be quite exciting. Aussies bowling well, pitch doing a bit. A proper target, as opposed to some 380 on a road crap.

      • Jarv says :

        The kiwis are absolutely cuffing India.

      • Judge Droid says :

        What happened to that Stokes thing? He hit some guy outside a pub. That thing was a news story for a few minutes then got well and truly swept under the rug.

      • Jarv says :

        The fuck it was. He was banned for ages, prosecuted and then cleared. And then banned again for good measure despite being acquitted.

      • Judge Droid says :

        He was out of the team for a bit, was acquitted despite video evidence to the contrary, then immediately back in the team. And he made up some shit about punching the guy cause he called someone gay. Because, you know, excuses.

      • Jarv says :

        He was banned from all formats for 6 months. Then acquitted in an actual trial. Then banned again for another 3 months despite being cleared.

        Personally, I think he was a cunt, was incredibly lucky not to go down, and deserved the ban. But given he didn’t actually do it, according the trial jury, 9 months ban was harsh.

      • Jarv says :

        Further to what we were bitching about yesterday, Buttler has just edged four.

        As soon as his bat started to move I knew he was going to edge it and I knew it would be 4. Shit form of the game.

      • Jarv says :

        Over went for 24. Including 2 horrible edges for 4. Bowlers need protection. It’s a joke.

      • Jarv says :

        An edge from Buttler finally goes to hand. Lot on Vince here.

      • Jarv says :

        Aussies should win from here.

      • Judge Droid says :

        He was acquitted despite video evidence showing him committing the crime. The only reason he was “cleared” is because he’s well-known. If he was Joe Bloggs from down the street he’d have served a stint.
        It doesn’t make him any different to other celeb, but to say he “didn’t actually do it” is bullshit. Jury, or not, he did it.
        Smith and Warner are the bad guys because they did something stupid, admitted it and paid the price without ever questioning it? Stokes was a drunk, vicious cunt who bashed someone but because he’s a celeb he was “acquitted”. He refused to take responsibility and he’s off the hook? Very strange.

      • Jarv says :

        Don’t be daft. It’s cricket in the UK. I doubt anyone on that jury had heard of him.

        He was still banned for 9 months for a crime he was cleared of.

        There was some talk that he was going to sue the ECB for it, dunno what happened with that though.

      • Judge Droid says :

        What planet do you live on? England is the most celeb obsessed country on earth. Every 2-bit asshole is a fucking celebrity in your country.
        Cleared and Innocent is not the same thing.

      • Jarv says :

        Since cricket went to sky, the profile of the players has dropped to way below some fat bint on gogglebox. It didn’t even make the front pages here. He’s about the same level of celebrity as your average minor Olympian.

      • Jarv says :

        So we’re going with guilty even after found not guilty then?

      • Judge Droid says :

        We’re going with I saw the video.

      • Jarv says :

        Sure. I did too. He was still acquitted.

        I forget why, but I have a feeling it’s because he was charged with the wrong crime.

      • Jarv says :

        Fucking Vince. Christ he’s shit.

      • Jarv says :

        Also, we’re actually quite good on prosecuting sportsmen. I can think of quite a few actually high profile players that went down. It’s not like nfl players in the states.

      • Judge Droid says :

        The problem with the NFL is that it’s random. They suspend for domestic stuff (as it should be) but an equal amount for smoking pot or alcohol. It’s antiquated and pretty much only about public perception.

      • Jarv says :

        They also never seem to prosecute regardless of evidence.

      • Jarv says :

        England still pootling along with singles.
        Edit: timed that well. Woakes hits a boundary.

      • Judge Droid says :

        So you didn’t see him attack another person?

      • Jarv says :

        I did. I also didn’t see the context (which you didn’t) and the version I saw was without sound.

        Look- you seem to think I condone what he did. I don’t. I haven’t complained about his various sanctions.

      • Jarv says :

        England seem to want to chase this with singles. Weird.

      • Judge Droid says :

        I don’t think you’re remembering it correctly.
        Anyway, what coverage you got in England was about 20% of the holier-than-thou dogshit soapbox grandstanding we got here. Their punishments were twice as long as any other country would have given. And most countries would have not admitted it and contested it.
        Can’t speak for the Gabba, but at the MCG they give players shit but it’s not very common. And these days it’s kind of rare.
        Broad deserved whatever he got. He was a cunt. And he gave as good as he got. For some players, giving them shit is a sign of respect. Trying to put them off their game.

      • Jarv says :

        I’d argue that Warner is a total cunt and deserves all the shit in the world.

        They got a year, didn’t they? For blatant, systematic, cheating and bullying. What did duPlessis get?

      • Jarv says :

        And you’re not really going to cop shit at Lords it the Oval- far too expensive and the stewards are cunts. Yeah, unfunny singing, but that’s about it.

  5. Xiphos0311 says :

    Watch list:

    Tacoma FD starring Farva and Mac from Super Troopers. They play firemen in Tacoma Washington. Since Tacoma is one of the rainiest cities in America that leaves time for a lot of shenanigans. The pilot was weak but its got consistently better as it goes on.It’s a funny show.

    I watched a couple of episodes of the new Twilight Zone. Its not good.

    I’ve mentioned this show before but I think I need to mention it again, Brockmire about a MLB announcer with more then a few personal demons trying to get right with life. This fucking show is flat out amazing. The episode last week with Brockmire having to deal with one of his only friends dying of cancer was absolutely brilliantly devastating and profoundly funny at the same time. And it was just two dudes sitting in a hospice room talking. This show is spectacular.

    Doom Patrol. This show is bizarre and deeply weird and completely nuts and a total blast to watch. How weird is it you might ask? here are two examples. There is a character called the Beard Hunter who can find any missing male by ingesting said persons beard hair. There is also a gender queer teleporting street named Danny.. That isn’t a typo on my part. The street, or really, urban landscape is sentient and protects outsiders and the disposed like drag queens. This show is weird but its not weird for the sake of being weird its organic to the story and grows from the writing. the cast is stellar and look like they are having a blast. The voice work(and occasional guest stints) by Brenden Fraser and Matt boomer are excellent. Wash from Fifefly as the bad guy is hilarious especially his fourth wall breaking monologuing.

    .

  6. tombando says :

    Late to the party as always:

    *Congrats on retiring Xiphos! May it go well for you. Find some well paying sanity outside. Good for you.

    *I just saw John Wick 3–having NEVER seen any of the first two, so it took a bit of scrambling to figger out this world-urmm The Table and Management and these homicidal Hotels and and all that. But I got it. I liked the movie-Bill and Ted there is pretty good as the blunt instrument. You have a combo Transporter/Taken/Mack Bolan/Punisher character here who winds up globe-hopping and being chased down by all manner of Ninjas, Arab killers and guys on crotch Rockets.

    *There’s attack dogs. Boys this movie enjoyed the attack dogs of Halle Berry’s. Interesting. She was okay. I wasn’t quite expecting her to be Ze Killer Chick but alright. You have a fun turn by Ian McShane, there’s our Other friend from the Matrix as his usual self getting cut up, and well–lotsa people being thrown through glass plates.

    *What was with the weird secretarial staff in the tattooes and all the retro phones and computers? Has to be from some comic book world, just written all over it.

    *I’ll def. catch both of the other two films, won’t be going outta my way for it but am curious.

    • Xiphos0311 says :

      Thank you Tom.

    • Jarv says :

      Watched NuMummy. It’s basically shit. There’s a fun film in there, but two lengthy exposition dumps in the first 45 mins means you aren’t going to see it.

      I actually want to see the film Russell Crowe thinks he’s in.

      • Judge Droid says :

        I think Crowe thought he was acting in a Mummy movie. The problem is that no one else associated with the movie thought they were making a Mummy movie.

      • Jarv says :

        Totally agree. He’s the only one that gets it.

      • Jarv says :

        Second film I’ve seen him in in a row where he’s been in a different and better film than the one everyone else is in. Along with Man of Stool.

  7. tombando says :

    Oh yeah the Cruise Mummy was AWFUL. Just had NO idea what it wanted to be-a Take down of the Mummy flix, a spoof of same, playing it Straight? He was miscast too. I liked Crowe in it, but as you said–he was in a totally different universe than these clowns.

  8. Jarv says :

    Cricket’s going well. Bairstow out for the most Golden of Golden Ducks. His first ball of the tourney. Second ball overall

    • Judge Droid says :

      Going alright now.

      • Jarv says :

        Recovered quite well. Buttler still to come, so probably 300-350 (still 15 overs left, so I’m leaving quite a big window).

        The Saffas are quite a good side from the looks of it.

      • Jarv says :

        Think Stokes needs to get a move on. We know Morgan can thrash it, but Stokes is an accumulator now. If he’s still there at about 40 overs, he needs to have a fucking splosh and either score a shitload or get out to get Buttler in.

      • Jarv says :

        To be fair, though, the England line up is fluid and they’ve sent him in because both set batsmen went at the same time, and needed to rebuild. If Root had hung around a bit, I bet Buttler would be in after Morgan.

      • Jarv says :

        He’s clearly listened to me. Just thrashed three fours off four balls.

      • Jarv says :

        Tits. There goes Morgan. Good catch though.

      • Jarv says :

        ‘kinhell Jos. Get your eye in first, don’t get out like a prat. You’ve got ages (by your standards)

      • Judge Droid says :

        They’ll need to get a wriggle on to get 350.

      • Jarv says :

        Don’t think they’re going to. I reckon about 320ish. Sky’s tracker has them at about 330.

        Depends what happens with Buttler. If he explodes then a horrifying total is happening (he has two ODI centuries for 50 balls or less). If he gets out, then we’ll struggle to make 300.

      • Jarv says :

        Shit. He’s gone.

      • Jarv says :

        There’s still quite a lot of batting- Moeen, Woakes, Archer and Rashid can all throw the bat.

      • Judge Droid says :

        Annoyingly, only the Aussie matches are on free to air over hear. And the finals. So I can’t really watch any games unless I find a dodgy stream.

      • Jarv says :

        None of it is on FTA here. None. Not a single match. And England are not really playing on the weekend.

        I’m in a huff with my workplace so am watching it in our Student Bar.

      • Judge Droid says :

        That sucks. But it’s a good excuse to frequent the bar.

      • Jarv says :

        Well, fuck them. They screwed me on that promotion, and I’ve been given an effective demotion as a result.

      • Jarv says :

        That was shit from Moeen. Utter shit. Another good catch though.

      • Jarv says :

        They ain’t making 300 at this rate.

      • Jarv says :

        I think I’m blaming Stokes for a lot of this. It’s people at the other end getting caught on the boundary because he’s nurdling singles and they’re trying to force it.

        Take nothing away from the Saffas- they’re bowling very well.

      • Jarv says :

        He’s finally hitting out, now he’s running out of partners. This has been the strangest innings- he’s going at more than a run a ball, but it feels so slow.

      • Jarv says :

        And he’s out. 300 up, One over to go, and he’s gone for 89.

      • Jarv says :

        311. That’s not enough nowadays.

  9. Jarv says :

    Well. Archer rearranged Amla’s head, so he’s retired hurt- probable concussion, and removed Makram. Saffas are 44-1 (really 44-2).

    The pitch seems to be doing a bit.

  10. tombando says :

    For what it’s worth, I saw the Lady Gaga ‘A Star is Born’ recently. I haven’t seen any of the others save the Streisand one, years ago. I remember liking that too.

    Just a few thoughts–

    *I liked it. Cliched plotline etc as it was, but–it worked. The old tropes still do the trick if carried out properly.

    *Gaga wasn’t bad. Donno her stuff that well, though ala Rihanna and Adele I know about Her, just because it’s unavoidable. She surprised me.

    *Bradley Cooper as an Allman Brother-well I liked him. And he directed, too? Nice job! Worthy.

    *I kept on saying-who is playing the Father, who is playing the father. See the credits. OH SHIT–Andrew Dice CLAY?!! Well. He’s aged. But–he was good! I liked him. And his cronies. The constant Sinatra stuff etc I coulda been a contender–Paul Anka said so! had me laughing.

    *Ditto about the best pal-I kept thinking-that’s a Wayans! Nope, it was David Chapelle! Okay–he was good in it too. Sorta has that one scene and then is gone. But okay fine.

    *The end of the movie REALLY pushed all the buttons with the GF, sorta like me after seeing the Kid and his guitar singing to Great Gram at the end of Coco. Waterworks!! It still does the trick doesn’t it? I was glad they didn’t soft pedal what an asshole the Cooper character was while bombed. It was not played for laughs.

    *And the music was pretty okay too.

    So that’s my 4 cents on it. If you’ve not seen it you might wanna give it a look if you are curious or like the performers.

    • Judge Droid says :

      A Star is Born has a pretty great first half and a pretty terrible 2nd half. As soon as the music producer/agent whatever he was came into the story it fell apart. Cooper and Gaga (especially) were good.

  11. Jarv says :

    Xi- you watched Archer in Space yet?

  12. Jarv says :

    Windies v Pakistan today. Windies bowling first. Hopefully they fucking stuff Pakistan.

    • Jarv says :

      Windies absolutely brutalising Pakistan. Excellent

      • Judge Droid says :

        105. Pathetic total.

        I hope the Windies go far in this tourney. Cricket needs the Windies to be good again.

      • Jarv says :

        That was brutal. Absolutely brutal.

      • Judge Droid says :

        That would have been a drubbing in T20, let alone a one-dayer.
        Aussies v Afghanistan tomorrow. Really shouldn’t be much different a result.

      • Jarv says :

        That will also be a slaughter.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        Careful with the Afgani’s they love to go to the blades. I was in Kabul in 2001 about 6 weeks after the invasion. The Afgan’s had dragged out all the stuff they hid from the Taliban like TV’s radios, books, kites(which was one of the more amazing things I’ve ever seen) and sporting equipment. We ended up having to break up massive brawls over The Cricket, football and rugby. We’re talking major league violence and death.

  13. Jarv says :

    Good Omens available today. Gonna watch it tonight. Before I start though, observations:

    1) Whoever that is that they’ve cast as Anathema is super hot. I approve.
    2) David Tennant and Michael Sheen are also well cast
    3) Jack Whitehall is not. Jack Whitehall is also an unfunny annoying hipster cunt and should fuck off into a barrel of toxic waste asap.
    4) Big Fat Meh to Frances McDormand as God. And why is God even narrating?
    5) Gaiman has gone out of his way to be super faithful. I’m not sure this will be a good thing as Pratchett loved wordplay so it could lead to a lot of exposition.
    6) This is a strange Pratchett book to adapt. None of the other adaptations have been much cop so far, (Going Postal is probably the best, because at least Richard Coyle is passable as Moist von Lipwig, unlike David Jason as Rincewind), so it could do well.

    • Judge Droid says :

      I have been indoctrinated to watch Good Omens by Amazon. Anything you watch on Prime begins with a 15 second ad for this show. I feel like I don’t have a choice.

      That chick is in s2 of True Detective as Taylor Kitsch’s beard. Also in Triple Frontier. She’s given nothing to so in either roles.

      I can’t stand Whitehall.

      • Jarv says :

        I absolutely loathe Whitehall. I honestly think he’s a Guardian Journalist in disguise. Could spend all night punching him in the face.

    • Xiphos0311 says :

      All I know about Good Omens is the write up I read. So its about an Angel and Demon screwing around on Earth and now they have to save it? Is that correct? Is the book good? I have not read much Pratchett so I am unfamiliar with him and his writings.

      • Jarv says :

        It’s ok. Not his best. It’s about the end of the world and all the various agencies trying to stop it.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        I have it in my line up so I’ll give it a look.

      • Jarv says :

        Initial episode 1 thoughts-

        It’s too close to the book. The narration is dumping actual paragraphs from the novel on to the screen. However, sheen, tennant and hamm are excellen and carrying it.

      • Jarv says :

        Episode 2 thoughts. Twatface isn’t as awful as expected and wosshername is pretty but not very good.

        It’s still too close to the book.

        Tennant and sheen still carrying it.

  14. Xiphos0311 says :

    More things I’ve watched lately:

    The Hot Zone on NatGeo based on the book of the same name. The book is a little wider in scope then the show, which is about a possible filioviruses outbreak near Washington DC in 1989. Filioviruses are a family of viral hemoragic fevers that include, the Sudan virus, Ravin virus, Marburg virus and Ebola. Yes there was an Ebola out break in Reston Virginia in 1989. I’ve seen this shit first hand in Africa you never ever want it to hit whatever country you are from. I know I will catch shit for the following statement but I think if there is a wide spread Marburg or Ebola outbreak in a first world country it will be handled much better then Africa or any other third world country.
    The show is based on the book so it involves the real people that fought this thing in 1989 including US Army Colonel Nancy Jaax a veterinary pathologist with the United States Army Medical Research Institute of Infectious Diseases (USAMRIID). The show alternates between a 1976 outbreak in Africa and the one in 1989. It scary because of the bureaucratic dick measuring and interpersonal relationships involved in the whole situation screw things up royally. Highly recommend this series since its only 6 episodes and viruses like Ebola are scary as hell and what will probably end the human race at some point.
    The movie Outbreak from 95 is loosely based on the book.

    The Game of Thrones finale….well that was….bad, truly awful and incredibly shitty and boring. It was terrible on every level, truly appalling. I was stunned that it was a show made by supposedly professional TV creators.Well at least Star Wars is now in good hands with the Double Douches in charge. Few questions:

    1 If the Red Keep fell on The Twin Fuckers how in the hell did they end up ON TOP of the pile of rubble and looking camera ready and not squashed into oblivion? In the previous episode you saw all the arch ways fall behind them prior the roof of the crypt collapsing yet the archways re-spawned themselves by the next episode so Tyrion could pull a improbable needle out of an impossible haystack and find them?

    2 So I guess Drogon was making the throne room disability compliant for the Branbot 9000 by melting the Iron Throne and not Plot Armor Snow?

    3. Grey Worm was for all intents and purposes the most powerful man in Westeros and he didn’t kill Plot Armor Snow( I know PLOT ARMOR!) right away and for that matter Tyrion? Then Branbot gets to be king? Huh, why?

    3. WTF happened to The Dothroki? did they just leave them in Westeros? What’s stopping them from being Dothroki and raping and pillaging? Also since the Khallesi made them all her Blood Riders why didn’t they kill Plot Armor Snow? I’ll give you one guess.

    4. So, the Khallessi destroyed 350 years of her families legacy, which she prattled on about the previous two episodes, because she went full Sand Snake?(Never go full Sand Snake) or was it because like her hair dresser and like totes BFF was killed by Cersi? And that like the boy she liked totally didn’t like, like her anymore? That’s got to some sort of Bechtel test failure, right?

    5. Who made Bronn Lord of High Garden? It wasn’t Tyrion he was in custody.Then he’s Master of Coin? really why? Did he perhaps take some accounting courses at the local the Community College? Why would anybody listen to Tyrion at the council and why does he get a vote? Why were Brianne the Burly and the Onion Knight there and voting? If anybody would be there it would be her father the lord of the emerald isles Further since both her and Davos are subjects of the Stormlands that means Gendry should have the only vote.That opens up a whole other line of questions like if Amelia Clark died before coronation is her proclamation about his bastardy even valid?

    6. What happened to winter? When Jamie left Kings Landing he was getting snowed on. Now there isn’t any winter because Dues ex Arya shanking the useless Night King? Who btw had absolutely zero agency in the story except to make Arya look cool AF. Barf gag I fucking loath Wolverine Stark.

    I have about a million more questions but fuck it it was shit. One last thing whoever on the show thinks they understand how medieval warfare works is a complete ass clown. Maybe because I have a degree in History focusing on military history and i have a particular liking for medieval warfare and understand the ins and outs and what have you of it. Maybe I’m being to sensitive to it but FUCK THAT! Especially when I over hear 18 year olds saying that if you have goddamed walls* you put your soldiers behind them. I mean Jesus fucking Christ you shoot this shit in Ireland and Spain both countries have universities(also the phones work you can call England or Scotland) with history departments that study this shit Spend 15 minutes talking to somebody. That way you won’t do stupidly aggravating garbage like send unarmored light cavalry on a charge like they are heavy cavalry. I know, I know they reasoning backwards from FLAMING SWORDS!!!! to get that visual but it was still stupid for like a hundred reasons nobody wants to hear me rattling on about.

    *I know it was all green screen and mock ups because it was all shot indoors and looked like crap. that’s why they did it.

    First episode of Chernobyl. Has to be said The Ruskies are some cold ass sombitches with the lowest case of self esteem outside of Hollywood I’ve ever seen. And I’ve seen just how cold those bastards can be.

    • Xiphos0311 says :

      I also watched the first episodes of Umberto Eco’s Name of The Rose. The production values were top notch however I question hiring John Turturro as William of Baskerville. The New York accent pulled me out of the story.

      Also saw the first episode of Das Boot. It was good.

      • Jarv says :

        To be fair, he’s following Sean Connery.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        I would rather hear a Scottish accent rather then a dude trying to cover up the sound of an actor trying to hide the fact that he’s ordering lasagna on Mulberry street.

    • M. Blitz says :

      I was giggling when tyrion found their beautiful corpses….magically unsmashed and also apparently only a few feet from safety. And was utterly stunned by the idea that grey worm wouldnt have avenged his queen. And quite irritated by the insinuation that dany went crazy cuz jon didnt like her like that. Stunned into utter uncaring serenity. Grey Worm especially. Beyond preposterous.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        that was an entirely boring episode badly made on every level.

        Grey Worm was the most powerful man in Westeros between the Unsullied and Dothroki he could’ve done anything he wanted until ALL the rest of the continent minus the twenty north men left, got their act together. it was all so perplexing.

      • M. Blitz says :

        And instead he’s like, let’s call all the lords and ladies, whose titles he totally respects, of lands he would obviously be beholden too, and let them all decide on a tidy technocratic solution, mass surveillance bran-style. So totally effing insane.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        Grey Worm should’ve run Jun Snuw through and been done with it. Everything else was Garbage writing. Well actually Drogon should’ve melted the shit out of Plot Armor boy but what evs.

      • M. Blitz says :

        There is no question in my mind that that is exactly what would have happened. Without a moment’s hesitation from Grey Worm.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        It was his Queen the one that freed him from bandage and lifted up the Unsullied and treated them like human beings. he would’ve cut down Dumbo in exactly zero point zero seconds. Buuuut the finale was written by the Double Douches so they said fuck all to good writing, like have from nearly the start. Star Wars is so very much more screwed with those two taking over.

  15. Xiphos0311 says :

    I have to hand it to the DC Streaming service they are, so far, three for three in funny book adaptations. I watched Swamp Thing this morning, and for a pilot, it was really good. ST leaned into the absolute weirdness of the premise hard and its body horror was top notch.

  16. tombando says :

    *What did I see lately…

    *Legends of the Fall–you know, 1995 Brad Pitt, Julia Ormond, Hannibal Lector and lots of the Montana plains. Has Henry Thomas from ET too. I had not seen this in many years. Just a few things–my memory was that the WW1 section went for quite a lot of the movie, I was Very surprised to see that it kept on going, and going, and Going, stopping at about 3 logical ending points–Brad Pitt comes back, sees his GF married to the Older Brother in her garden at their estate, waves to her thru the fence, leaves. Or-Brad Pitt is married now to the 19 year old Indian girl, they have kids, as a family they run into the GF and older brother at the County Fair. Everyone’s sorta awkward but where they are in life. FIne. Roll credits. Nope, they don’t do that. They Instead throw in this extraneaous bootlegger plotline that gets stupid, takes another life and you just want them to get it done with already. I donno. It was like that whole Cuba trip from Bad Boys Too. You know that was thrown in after the rewrite. If not it shoulda been.

    I still like the movie, just—it suffers from Peter Jackson syndrome. Here’s the ending. Take it.

    Mr Mom-83. Fun Mike Keaton/Teri Garr/Ann Jillian guy loses job, wife takes a job, guy does the slobout routine with his kids etc. Wife does well but has complications with boss Martin Mull hitting on her bad, ditto for Keaton as neighbor Ann Jillian does the same. That’d be hard to pass up yes. Anyways–it has lotsa fun faces show–Jeffrey Tambor, Christopher Lloyd, Exidor from Mork, etc. Good stuff. Plays like an extended sitcom but the cast is winning and you will find yourself enjoying yourself more than you’d expect, esp. if its been some time since you saw it.

    GODZILLA KING OF MONSTERS! Out now. It has to be done in all caps to match the Kaiju fest. It’s fun. It’s great. IT’s–Dumb. It’s–got weirdness. It has a Giant Mammoth-that makes a cameo. Ditto the Big Spider. And the Muto. The others aren’t really shown. You get Godzilla, Mothra, Ghidorah-3 headed dragon thingy–and Rodan going at it. And a Shield Super Jet type thing the good guys fly round in called the Argo. It has the Scarlet Witch, Gedde Watanabe, urmmm the Early Edition guy and a flattened Fenway Park. It has destruction on a massive scale. It also shows the Monsters, right there, in front of the camera, for long destructive periods of time. You aren’t shorted on this at all.

    Is it any good? Uhhh, sure! We all saw it and had a blast. A friend of mine who is a HUGE Godzilla fan said that was the movie he’d been wanting to see since he was a kid, more or less. So yeah if it worked for him, it will likely work for you if you are a fan of Kaiju stuff. The plot-what plot? 17 buried ‘Titans’ are woke up by an electronic Doohickey mis-used by the Scarlet Witch and they start flattening cities. Godzilla goes after Ghidorah because Ghidorah is the new threat to his reign as Apex Beast. He loses, they have a draw, then he wins. Mothra is fun. Rodan flattens a Mexican city. The military does what it does. DC is flattened too.

    I think you’ll have a good time. Watch it in at the movies to get the best effect. I don’t think it’d play as well otherwise.

    Oh Kong makes a cameo you Will be seeing him and Godzilla go at it next film.

    So that’s what I saw for what it’s worth.

    • Xiphos0311 says :

      Mr. Mom is great. Full stop. I still use lines from that movies like

      I like Legends of the Fall. The cinematography is superb and the story and acting was engaging.

      i don’t have any interest in Kajira movies.

      • Jarv says :

        I hate Legends of the Fall. OH MY GOD THE BOREDOM.

        I do concede that it’s shot nicely.

        BUT OH MY GOD THE BOREDOM

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        I can see that. For me, maybe if I watch it again, it will be that way. Its been a very long time since I’ve seen it so It could be that at the time the movie ‘spoke” to me because of whatever was going on.

      • Jarv says :

        I have it in the same class as a River Runs Through It and other films that are big on ‘Merican scenery.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        I love River Runs Through It but that’s because I am a huge fan of the short story and like to fly fish. I guess i’m into big Merican scenery porn.

      • Judge Droid says :

        This. I’ve seen it once. Never again.

        Pitt also made that Tibet movie that I canned half way through. And Joe Black. He’s got a few turkeys on his resume.

      • Jarv says :

        All of those are also really, really fucking boring. Particularly Joe Black.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        The Tibet movie was particularly egregious since it was a about a NAZI and they total skipped that little fact.

      • Jarv says :

        It’s a monumentally boring book, IIRC. And he wasn’t a “real” nazi cos desertion. Or something.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        I thought he was a true blue believer? I could be wrong though.

      • Jarv says :

        That’s my fault. He was, but they justified it by saying he wasn’t a real Nazi because he deserted and ran away to Tibet.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        desertion disqualifies you as being a nazi? I guess Himmler has been vindicated.

      • tombando says :

        Yeah I was thinking of River Runs Through It while watching this, and Last of the Mohicans with Daniel Day Lewis. I don’t Dislike Legends of the Fall, it’s just–too long. I would have preferred more WW1 stuff, there just aren’t that many movies that do the Trenches or whatever justice seems to me.

        One thing that I Do appreciate, though it was kinda bandwagoning by Hollywood after Dances with Wolves-Indians were ‘in’ for about half the decade–Mohicans, Legends of the Fall, Northern Exposure, Geronimo, etc. You know-Graham Greene, West Studi, the guy in Legends there, we got to see Tantoo Cardinal etc in a lotsa things. Which is one reason Longmire appealed–they did a good job with the whole Reservation angle and you don’t see that so much.

        Geronimo is the one with Matt Damon in the US Cavalry and he looks like he’s 16.

  17. Judge Droid says :

    What happened, Jarv? The Poms lost to Pakistan? The same team that got demolished by the Windies a few days ago?

    I’m starting to get concerned about our match against the Windies on Thursday. That said, I do want them to be good again. Cricket could really use the West Indies of old.

  18. Jarv says :

    Recently watched- Good Omens (all bar the last episode). It’s OK. Comfortably the best Pratchett adaptation so far, but rarely great. 2 out of 4 Changs.

    Annie Hall

    I haven’t seen this in 20 years, and I have to say, I think it’s kind of shit now. It’s not funny, particularly, he’s an annoying prick, and loads of it is both boring and irritating. It’s dated as fuck, but this isn’t helped by the fact that almost all the really famous bits have been used everywhere.

    Manhattan

    I am never watching another Woody Allen film after this. I hadn’t seen it before, but it’s fucking creepy as fuck seeing it now knowing it after all his dirty paedo laundry came to light. He’s dating Mariel Hemmingway’s character- a 16 year old.

    Annie Hall is riddled with shit about banging teens as well. Both of them really suffer in the light of 2019.

    • Just Pillow Talk says :

      Never seen either of those, and probably never will. No interest in Woody Allen flicks, never understood the love for his movies.

      • Jarv says :

        I think they’re of their time, to be honest. The hard core Noo Yawk Jewish comedy hasn’t aged well, and he’s a creepy little fuck who comes across as really, really irritating.

      • Judge Droid says :

        The one Woody Allen movie I love is Bullets Over Broadway. Hilarious, great cast and Woody Allen isn’t in it.

      • Jarv says :

        He’s not in Mighty Aphrodite either, is he? Midnight in Paris wasn’t too bad either.

        Also, one of the things that fucked me off about Vicky Christina Barcelona was the voice over, which wasn’t Woody Allen, but may as well have been.

    • Xiphos0311 says :

      Those movies are definitely of there time and place. that being said they still suck. I’m like Pillow I never got the love for Woody Allen. I find his screen persona hugely irritating.

      • Jarv says :

        1000 times this. And they’re creepy as fuck watching them now.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        Annie Hall was NYC circa mid 70’s. That place wascreepy. Plus Woody Allen.

      • Jarv says :

        Oh sure, but it’s legitimately cringey listening to him talking about boning 16 year olds and travelling to LA to stalk/ harass her into coming back to New York with him (and weird considering he’s spent all film to that point bitching about New York too).

        Manhattan is even creepier.

        It doesn’t help that he basically looked like a 75 year old pederast back then. And still looks like one now.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        I never understood the love of Woody Allen but then again there is love for Polanski so the problem lies with Hollywood. Yes i went there.

      • Jarv says :

        Polanski at least, before he was a known pervert, made some classic films (Rosemary’s Baby and Chinatown). I struggle to watch anything he’s made since Chinatown.

        Which reminds me, was reading a big article and I think they’ve nearly got enough to take Singer down, finally.

      • Jarv says :

        Also, we’ve done this before, but Polanski didn’t/ doesn’t work through his issues on Camera like Allen, Salva and Singer do. This is what makes the latter three overwhelmingly more creepy than him, even if he is the only *actual* rapist of this horrifying rogues gallery.

        Also read a good piece on Corey Feldman- he’s got the money together to do his reveal all on the Hollywood perverts that passed him and Haim around like a party favour.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        Hollywood has weird double and triple and maybe even quadruple standards when it comes to these issues, its terrible if somebody isn’t considered a good actor or director but if you are lauded or gay you get a pass. It should be one standard, if you are a scumbag kiddie fiddler you are done. Gay straight whatever if you are a pervert fuck you you’re going away to prison and booted from the industry. I know it will never happen but a boy can dream.

      • Jarv says :

        I think it has got better, I’d also add pervert rapist (of either gender) to that too, so that the likes of Weinstein can’t slime away.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        its gotten somewhat better but you still have people, like Meryl Streep, that defend these ass holes for reasons I can’t figure out.

      • Jarv says :

        Streep is all in. These people “made” her career, given that she ain’t that good looking and wasn’t (back then) that recognised for her talent. Without Woody Allen casting her in Manhattan and so forth she’d probably be Susan Sarandon now.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        I get the loyalty factor but in the face of overwhelming evidence you have to stop or at least shut up about it.

      • Jarv says :

        Oh no doubt. And there’s a fair few of them like her too.

      • Judge Droid says :

        Aubrey Plaza? If she gave a Safety Not Guaranteed performance.

      • Jarv says :

        That’s a great call.

      • Continentalop says :

        Call me an idiot, but while i can admire aspects of Woody Allen’s films, never really liked them. The Woody Allen films I always liked the most was his early screwball ones, like Bananas, Sleeper, Everything You Wanted to Know About Sex, and Take the Money And Run. Always preferred those to his later “masterpieces” like Annie Hall, Manhattan, etc.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        You’re an idiot. I don’t really think so but you told me to call you that.

      • Continentalop says :

        The Hollywood elites exist in an isolated, insular world.

        Although I think there is a generation gap – previous generations didn’t want to know about what horrible shit other filmmakers and actors were doing, because in the past everyone was probably doing something that the public would frown upon (I am not talking about just pedo & rape shit, but being a homosexual, drug user or affairs). It was kind of a code of silence.

        The modern MeToo era is kind of turned against this, but while I got no problem with Polanski, Weinstein and Allen being “cancelled”, I do think the MeToo stuff is pretty much rich white “feminist” bullshit. None of them give a shit that their nannies or maids, or the extras or female crew members or PAs, are treated like shit.

        Hollywood MeToo is that you can’t harass females who are or will become big stars, but the nobodies and people at the bottom? Go ahead, keep making their life shit.

      • Jarv says :

        I think there’s a lot of truth to that. Also, it’s been disheartening the way that male victims have for the most part been sidelined. I’m willing to bet that the likes of Feldman have had a far far worse time than the McGowans of the world.

        I get that Feldman is a bit eccentric but the way he tells it there’s still a conspiracy to silence him.

      • Continentalop says :

        I have a friend who was a child actor who was molested by a casting agent as a kid.

        I think what happened to McGowan sucks, but I do think that there is way worse things going on with children, male and female. Think The Godfather deleted scene with the movie producer and the child actress.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        Kiddie fiddlers make me mental. I have had way to many friends growing up having to live with that shit. It leaves a mark forever.

      • tombando says :

        Yeah agreement. Woody Allen’s been massively into 16 yr olds forever, some model has been interviewed about moving in w him and Mia in 70s, all that threeway stuff and etc was him through and through. I cannot watch him either.

        Only thing about Mark Evanier I hate is his blindspot always defending Allen. Ffs just Stop. It’s like Joe Posnanski ditto Paterno. Drop it.

  19. Jarv says :

    Oh, and the Boxing was fucking hilarious. Go on Fat Man.

    Thought AJ was overrated for a while. Think Wilder is actively shit with a massive right hand. Fury is the best of the “big 3” but that’s not saying much as he lacks power.

    Hope the fat lad wins the rematch

    • Xiphos0311 says :

      I sort of think fat boy will pull a buster douglas and get his ass handed to him in the rematch.

      • Jarv says :

        It was that first Knock down in the third. Dinged AJ right on the ear. Fucked up his balance and all sorts.

        This is why the phrase “Puncher’s chance” exists. The odds of him landing that blow again are pretty tiny.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        I think AJ was looking past this tomato can and paid the price.

      • Jarv says :

        I do too. But I still think he’d have beaten chubby on a normal day.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        agreed.

  20. Just Pillow Talk says :

    The Umbrella Academy…

    Finished the first season (as the second has been announced), and all in all I liked it. It’s a bit quirky, pieces of “the seven” are revealed each episode, as is “dad”. Not familiar with the comics, I do not know the backstory, but it seems like their dad ain’t from around these parts, which of course none of the kids are aware of.

    No. 5 has the best backstory setup, but Klaus is the character that amuses me. See through Ben I would expect to become visible to the rest next season on a consistent basis. The rest of the characters are sort of there, including Page’s character who has her Phoenix moments, certainly the way she took out someone was pretty cool.

    I will give the next season a shot, whenever that comes out.

    • Jarv says :

      Thought it was fundamentally OK apart from Page who was actively fucking terrible. To be fair, it’s in part because the character was sedated, but she really sank it when on screen.

    • Xiphos0311 says :

      I thoroughly enjoyed The Umbrella Academy. I liked how it pissed all over the concept of the super team. I also enjoyed trying figure out which super hero and powers they were giving to the characters.
      I thought Klaus was by far the best most entertaining member of the UA with the best most heart breaking arc, the two assassins were also excellent. The Batman/Punisher character was also very interesting considering he didn’t want to be the way he was. The one thing that really sold me on the show was that goofy dance scene set that that Tiffany song. it was just so random.

      • Jarv says :

        Sheehan (played Klaus) was Nathan in Misfits back in the day. It’s exactly the same performance from him- not that it’s a bad performance. He’s entertaining. My only criticism of it is how badly fivehead sucked. And how boring she was.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        I think some of Five heads” boringness” was intentional. Her character was supposed to be marginalized and be a after thought a ghost if you will compared to the others.. She came on as she was manipulated into her Dark Phoenix moment.

      • Jarv says :

        I do concede that she spent the whole series sedated, so it wasn’t totally her fault.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        I don’t think Ellen Page is a terribly strong actress so some of it was her fault. Considering how large the others got to play their characters she was was stuck with what she was given and what she could do.

      • Jarv says :

        It was unfortunate that she got the sedated character. Her best asset is her chirpiness, but she was forced to do dour and sedated all film and she does not do that well.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        No not at all dour isn’t in her wheel house.

      • Jarv says :

        I struggle to think who you would cast in that role and it go well. She has to be an everywoman type, and so you can’t go expressly gothy. I was thinking Neve Campbell when watching it, for some unknown reason.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        Campbell circa Scream era would’ve been a good choice.

      • Jarv says :

        Isn’t she meant to be in her thirties? There must be someone.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        Isn’t Campbell in her mid 40’s now? I think they were all supposed to be born in like 83-4 maybe.

      • Jarv says :

        Would make them 36. Campbell is 45. Too old.

        Paige is 32.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        and she looks younger.

      • Jarv says :

        I thought that too.

        It’s actually hard casting. You need someone plain without a lot of work that can then put on dark eyeliner and become sort of hot in an evil way that can carry dour. Paige, in theory, does tick a lot of those boxes, but she can’t do dour and as she only really gets to chew some scenery in the last episode they should’ve gone with an actress that can carry dour.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        I looked it up all the kids were born in 1989. There are a few actress that do dour well however I can’t think of their names at the moment.

      • Jarv says :

        30 on the button. That gives a realistic age range of late 20’s-mid 30’s.

        I’m also struggling to think who could do it. Wosshername that plays Jessica Jones? Kristen Ritter? Or is she too obviously hot?

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        Ritter is a good call. she can be toned down like in Breaking Bad.

      • Jarv says :

        The problem is you can’t cast Ritter in that story, as she’s already JJ, so is intrinsically associated with being superpowered. Blows the surprise. (Not that it was that much of a surprise)

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        I agree about casting her. I was just saying she was a good idea for casting..

      • Jarv says :

        Oh sure. I was just pointing out the very obvious downside of casting her in that role.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        Another issue with Ritter is her being tall. Page is so tiny and can almost disappear in a scene while Ritter takes up some real estate.

      • Jarv says :

        She’s thin though, and can kind of scrunch up when required. But yeah, that’s a good point too.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        The lead actress on fear the walking dead does dour well but she might be way to hot for the role.

      • M. Blitz says :

        Wait, who was born in 1989? Do you mean the characters were born in 89??

        I liked the show. Also liked Klaus the best and found Page underwhelming. That Tiffany song was my motherfucking jam when i was in elementary school. Love it to this day. Legit excellent cover. Just confused now why babies born in 89 would have an attachment to the exquisite jams of Our Lady of the Mall (blessed be her name).

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        yeah all the characters were born on the same day in October of 89 along with a bunch of other kids. Mr Monocle bought the seven of them to raise as the super group.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        Not sure why they chose the song but it worked great.

      • M. Blitz says :

        It worked fabulously….until this very moment. Tiffany’s songs were not getting played in the 90s. I was gonna draw a comparison to some songs that came out a few years before I was born, but a quick examination of the hits revealed that I’ve known them all my entire life and still hear them endlessly everytime I get in my car. The radio stays playing some 70s rock. Tiffany? Once in a blue moon.

        This is also some patently absurd nit-picking. And for that I do apologize lol

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        she usually got played on like one hit wonder weekends and the like.

      • M. Blitz says :

        Yep one hit wonders or now if they do an 80s flashback weekend or such. Not anywhere near often enough and i will belt that shit out every time.

        Meanwhile, I hear Journey and Foreigner’s greatest hits at least 3 times a day. I need some 80s playback parity dammit. Somebody alert the guardian.

    • Judge Droid says :

      UA was okay. But too familiar. Pretty much the Dark Phoenix story. At least, the way X-Men 3 told the Dark Phoenix story. It had a very good pilot episode. Didn’t really live up to that promise.

  21. Jarv says :

    Pity the weather’s shit. Afghanistan have a proper chance to do a Test Nation here. Sri Lanka have been abject.

  22. Jarv says :

    The Guardian is such a shitrag nowadays:

    https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2019/jun/04/gender-equality-world-system-parity-2030

    For fuckssakes. So much drivel. The hate crime paragraph is particularly fucking stupid.

    • Xiphos0311 says :

      The Guardian has to know that most of the world outside of The UK, Western Europe, 2/3rds of North America and Australia and NZ doesn’t subscribe to those ideals in any way? They know this right?

      • Jarv says :

        The UK doesn’t either. The Fucking Wage Gap- in like for like comparisons women actually earn more for the same role. Where it divulges is childcare. If you want to really promote gender equality, then you fix paternity leave. Almost all the issues she’s imagining on that front disappear if you do that.

      • Judge Droid says :

        The Guardian’s philosophical policy is…
        1. Clicks
        2. Clicks
        3. Clicks

      • Jarv says :

        It’s getting worse. They give bandwidth to the worst writers nowadays.

    • M. Blitz says :

      Hahah that one got you riled up? I found it pretty mild for the Guardian, and I write as one who regularly has her blood pressure tweaked by the guardian’s counterproductive clicks-driven hijinks. Full of drivel and polemical assertions but a bit light on details/proposals? But of course. Just wait until you’re treated to a whole column on what other *concepts* should be declared hate crimes. Enforcement of which should be fun. But why get into details. It’s the polemic that counts.

      But yeah, the majority of the writing is terrible, and sooo many of the writers are incredibly annoying. I sort of regard it as a tabloid at this point. One I continue reading despite often wanting to stab myself.

  23. M. Blitz says :

    Did anybody watch The Terror? I’m about halfway through and it has got me VERY hooked. I know nothing of the story other than that they found the ships a few years ago.

    The sailor’s life would not have been the life for me. When i was younger I could imagine (some completely ahistorical made up version of) it. But now? NOPE. Seriously, fuck alllllllll of that. No thanks.

    • Xiphos0311 says :

      Yeah i watched The Terror it was good.

      The age of sails is way overly romanticized. It was a brutal way to make a living.

      • M. Blitz says :

        I think I’d rather go to prison, than go out on the high seas. If the terms were comparable, yeah, prison for sure.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        naw you never want to get lock up.
        Modern sail boats have all the amenities of a home. If I ever build a boat you’ll see.

      • M. Blitz says :

        Very skeptical but willing to be proved wrong, should the stars align and with a pristine long range forecast.

        Last time I was on a boat was over 20 years ago. Not a sailboat. It was like a tiny fishing boat and was getting tossed like a toy when a minor storm hit the Chesapeake bay. My grandfather’s ashes were flying all over and we were holding on for dear life. That bay can really lurch.

      • Jarv says :

        Having done both, I’ll take the sea over the slammer.

      • M. Blitz says :

        I don’t know….theoretically at least, you can escape from prison, or be evacuated or something. On a ship…nowhere to go!

        Admittedly, this whole ship vs prison scenario involves (unstated and totally in my head) being in some way conscripted or employed. Not like freely aboard (but even then….oof). Also in-mind, a mid-18th century ship, though not strictly required. How long do ships stay at sea without stopping anyway? I know nothing about all that. Looks horrific though. This show certainly doesnt make it seem appealing. And they’re not even on ships anymore.

      • M. Blitz says :

        That should’ve been mid 19th century. Argh. As if that ramble wasnt already an obvious product of a stoned flight of fancy.

  24. tombando says :

    Oh I have been meaning to put this link here about Angelica Huston. https://www.vulture.com/2019/05/anjelica-huston-in-conversation.html Good fucking Christ Jack Nicholson just comes off as being a total assbag back there a ways. You scratch the surface this guy was hanging around with fucking Polanski by the sounds? I don’t like him. Not talking his acting, just…Him…

  25. Just Pillow Talk says :

    Just finished watching the last episode of Chernobyl…I am just shaking my head. Fucked up. The court scenes interspersed with the flashbacks at the plant were so well done. Cannot recommend this mini series enough.

    • M. Blitz says :

      Havent watched the final one yet (today!). But last week’s sure was grim. All the vodka in the world wouldnt have been enough….Shit, all the dope in the world would not have been enough to get over being put on pet patrol. Got to be one of the worst jobs ever.

  26. Jarv says :

    A moment’s silence if you please.

    Right wing nutjob, Based Amy, who was previously only noteworthy for being banned from going 50ft near the sea (for fuckssakes) stabbed the Trump Baby Balloon to death today.

    I am deeply saddened at the passing of one of the funnier things we’ve come up with in recent times.

    • M. Blitz says :

      Noooooooo not baby trump balloon!

      So typical…..once it’s an actual baby, the knives come out. Inflatable trump fetus for next time?

      • Jarv says :

        This woman is completely mental. Like seriously should’ve been Sectioned mental (Sectioned is named after Section 8 of the Mental Health Act where you can be looked up for treatment if you are a risk to yourself and others).

        She’s a menace.

      • M. Blitz says :

        Is there video of the stabbing? And what’d she do to get banned from the sea?? Def sounds quite unhinged.

      • Jarv says :

        Yup there is a video.

        Also, the restraining order from the ocean- I think it was taken out by the Coast Guard after she managed to rack up over £1m in rescue bills after repeated suicide attempts.

        http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/wales/6962633.stm

      • M. Blitz says :

        Oh my. Yeah, that would seem to be a clear case for at least short term sectioning.

        Does that happen often there?

      • Jarv says :

        Sectioning? Quite often.

      • M. Blitz says :

        How long do they hold people typically? Here it is quite the hurdle, proving that someone is an imminent danger. They just about need to have a gun to their head or a knife to somebody’s throat. At that very moment. A previous moment that has passed wouldn’t necessarily be enough.

      • Jarv says :

        Depends on the case. It won’t be for life

      • M. Blitz says :

        Tangentially related, but seriously, don’t let us anywhere NEAR your nhs.

  27. Jarv says :

    I think Season 2 of Happy is available in the UK today. I have the last Good Omens to watch tonight too.

    • Xiphos0311 says :

      The second season wasn’t as good as the first season IMO.

    • Jarv says :

      Well. The last episode of Good Omens was a colossal disappointment. They decided to move away from the novel by concluding the story really early in the episode.

      What followed was then shit. So bad, actually, it’s made me rethink the whole series.

  28. Continentalop says :

    Recent viewing:

    King of Comedy – masterpiece.

    Get Carter – Michael Caine version. Masterpiece.

    Wages of Fear – Masterpiece.

    Rim of the World – Just horrible. Which sucks because I kind of know the screenwriter and he is a nice dude. But just terrible.

    Game of Thrones (season 8) – what a car wreck.

    Ray Donavan (Season 1) – Really enjoyed it, wish I watched it from the beginning.

    Started Barry (season 1) and Cobra Kai (season 2). Trying to watch iZombie, but just not in the mood or something. Seattle becoming a zombie city didn’t really help the show.

    Also watched a show called Street Food on Netflix, which is just food porn but I enjoyed it.

    • Continentalop says :

      I’ve actually been reading way more than I have been watching stuff.

      But almost forget, rewatching The Rockford Files so I can be 100% Jim Rockford. God, that show really holds up and is awesome.

    • Xiphos0311 says :

      Get Carter i prefer the Stallone version…

      Ray Donovan is a schizophrenic show season to season, episodes to episode and even with in episodes. the later seasons get downright weird.

      Barry is funny season two is great.

      Cobra Kai S2 didn’t really work for me until the last three episodes.

    • Jarv says :

      I also watched a few episodes of Street Food. I kind of lose interest in these things after a couple.

      • Continentalop says :

        It just repeats itself, but I love travelogue food shows. It’s my fetish. Don’t kink shame.

  29. Jarv says :

    Happy Season 2- Beware Spoilers.

    Episode 1- massively strong opening with the exploding nuns. Starts to get a bit humdrum by the half way point, although Patton is still good as Happy, and there are still a few great visual gags, and the accidental slaughter is really well done.

    Episode 2: yuck. Torture Porn. Not pleased they bought back Smoothie, and disappointed to see Isabella die. Bits of it were great, but overall it’s tiring.

    General thoughts- the acting is as a rule really solid. In particular the kid is great, and Meloni is having a blast. I fancy cop turned realtor, so can give her a pass even though she’s the weakest.

    It’s been cancelled by Sciffy, which I think might be a good thing, because it’s already feeling tired and I’m only two episodes in.

  30. Jarv says :

    Aussies having a bit of a mare here. ‘mon the Windies.

    I’m actually torn as to whether I want the Windies to win the whole thing, including England.

    • Jarv says :

      Smith may have a broken finger…

      • Jarv says :

        Coulter-Nile (who I always thought was a bit shit, to be honest) digs Australia out of a hole and wallops 92.

      • Jarv says :

        Convicts come back really well here. Coulter Nile’s thrash looks match-winning now.

      • Judge Droid says :

        Didn’t see the Windies innings but looks like the umpiring was pretty shit. Windies had to challenge a few decisions. We were lucky to get the win. Needed a crazy knock from Coulter-Nile.

      • Jarv says :

        The umpiring was disgraceful. I’ve never seen that many reviews in a ODI- and Gayle shouldn’t have been out- Windies could well have won if he’d been in for longer.

        Still, you have to be pleased- banana skin avoided.

  31. M. Blitz says :

    I’ve been watching The Expanse. That makes 3, along with the Terror and Chernobyl, Jared Harris shows simultaneously! Man he really is everywhere lately.

    The Expanse is pretty entertaining. Earth and Mars hovering on the brink of war. Thomas Jane with a funny haircut and hammy mannerisms. Jared Harris doing space patois. Downtrodden “belters” and underground resistance/terrorist (depending on who you ask) organizations.

  32. Judge Droid says :

    WTF? DC have cancelled Swamp Thing after 1 episode! I haven’t even watched it yet!

    • Jarv says :

      Shit. That’s a pity because Titans was solid

      • Judge Droid says :

        Haven’t watched Titans, but Doom Patrol is good. Need to finish season 1.

      • Jarv says :

        I really liked Titans. Waiting for DPnto appear on U.K. Netflix.

        Quite liked Black Lightning.

      • Continentalop says :

        Black Lightning is like the only DC CW show I like.

        Of course, I have only watched season 1.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        It’s weird why the cancelled Swamp Thing. It was an error in paper work that doomed the show. North Carolina was supposed to give the production company a 40 million dollar tax rebate which would be half the production budget. Screwed up paper messed that all up so DC pulled the plug even after NC tried to get them 14 million prorated.

  33. Jarv says :

    Happy! update-

    Nearly finished it. Xi is right it’s nowhere near as good as the first series. Partially because it’s MORE insane- which is crazy as the first one was bugnuts.

    The real problem is that there are too many plotlines that it needs to pull together and this causes the early-mid episodes to really drag. From the top:

    1) Nick going straight and making an effort to not be a shit dad with Hailey-
    2) Meri trying to take down Sonny Shine
    3) Sonny Shine trying to get his Easter spectacular on the air
    4) All the background info for Sonny Shine
    5) Happy “growing up”.
    6) Smoothie indoctrinating Hailey
    7) Hailey’s PTSD problems
    8) Amanda’s disgusting impregnation
    9) Blue in prison
    10) Orcus.
    11) Sonny’s Easter Terrorism antics

    That is a shit load of major plot threads for a relatively short series. It feels totally overladen and a complete mess.

    I think they’d have been better off leaving all the Orcus stuff until the next series, to start with, and just done this one on Nick going straight, Hailey’s PTSD, Amanda’s impregnation, Sonny in the background and Blue going to prison.

    This would have kept all the pieces in play, but instead there feels like there are far too many moving parts, made worse by flashbacks and whatnot. All the Dayglo Doug stuff, for instance is just distraction- but really important to explain Sonny.

    This feels like the right place to leave it, as I have no idea how on earth they top Orcus and the Wishies in the next series.

    On the plus side:

    Meri and Hailey are both excellent and need more work, particularly Meri. Amanda’s Ripley moment with the Wishies and then her beating the shit out of the Smoothies was great. Meloni is really enjoying himself, and Patton Oswalt as Happy is still bang on note. It’s still entertainingly over the top (Happy’s rainbow orgasm has to be seen to be believed).

    2.5 out of 4, as opposed to the first series’ 3 out of 4.

  34. tombando says :

    What Have I seen lately?

    *Some Britbox stuff–

    Gil Mayo? from 2006. Caught 3 episodes. A sorta tongue in cheek investigative show, the English police use a black and white checked RV of sorts in this show, the lead guy does the Columbo bit with his Velma and Shaggy like minions and an ex-girl friend, a blonde who has the Daphne bit down. I liked it! The cases were rather Murder She Wrote, some of the baddies were out of left field, I def. want to see the rest of this. They only did 8 shows? Huh. It had potential. Never heard of it of course.

    Sharpes’ Rifles–Sean Bean and Brian Cox. First episode only. Pretty good! whole Peninsular War thingy against Napoleon. FIlmed in NW Spain/Portugal. I liked it. I will watch more. Heard the books were pretty good too.

    Can’t remember the name-starred the guy who was Tristan in the James Herriot series, Last Detective? from 2003 or so. Just the pilot episode. I enjoyed that too. He’s a good world weary type actor and this had possibilities.

    Was reading up on the old Andy Capp comic strip-don’t ask-I don things like that-and I was surprised to find out that the character lived in a Real town there, Hartlepool?? Not sure but it has a real Pittsburgh by the Sea look to it from the strip from my memory. Anyways that’s just trivia but thought it was neat.

    • Xiphos0311 says :

      I’ve read, I think, five of the Sharpe books. the first three and two from the later run of the series. They’re pretty decent but sort of repetitive much like The Hornblower or Jack Aubry stories are but instead of naval service its infantry. The book is chock full of historical battles, people and places.it also deep dives into what’s its like to serve as a rifleman in His Majesties service

    • Jarv says :

      Hartlepool is a shithole.

  35. tombando says :

    And a couple more–not britbox.

    *Stand by Me-1986. You all know this one. Holds up well! I used to own it, haven’t watched in years. I always forget that subplot involving the fat kid….

    *Forever After-1998 Drew Barrymore does the Cinderella thing with Angelica Houston and a bunch of French Castles. I liked it! Nice twist here on the old thing. This was a first viewing. Has a little ‘Princess Bride’ vibe to it. Good stuff.

  36. Xiphos0311 says :

    The Swamp Thing cancellation just keeps getting weirder. The State government of NC pushed back hard. The dude in charge of the tax department said NC only gives 12 million total in tax rebates and all the paper work is in order. There was never 40 million and they aren’t responsible in any way for the cancellation.
    It sounds like to me that DC wasn’t to high on the series after it went into production so they cut the order then said screw it and cancelled it then tried to blame NC for it.

  37. M. Blitz says :

    Whyyyyy do work people have to call? When email will suffice? Dude keeps calling me despite having had his little nothing of a question answered. Jesus christ he is calling again as I type this into my phone. Everytime I speak to him he goes on at length about how beautiful my voice is. I havent come up with a proper reply that strikes the proper tone, while still delivering the message.

    I scheduled some time off work and that shit can’t get here quick enough 😑

  38. Xiphos0311 says :

    I am off to Los Angeles for a job interview tomorrow. I will not be taking the job but they are putting me up in a major league hotel in the Mid Wilshire area and pouring expensive food down my gullet so what the hell. its a mini vacation. The next one will be in Miami. Won’t be taking that one either.

    • M. Blitz says :

      Damn Xi that is some good strategizing right there.

      When you get to Miami, visit socom and tell them to get their shit together lol they drive me up the wall and over the other side.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        SOCOM? I assume you mean Special Operations Command? that place is a clown car. I’ve had to deal with them for years. In Both Army and Marine Corps.

      • M. Blitz says :

        They are one of the few spots that have actually shocked me with how messy and jacked up they do things.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        You want messy? work directly for them, then you’ll really see it. The preening, the infighting, the budget and operational battles. Clown Car is apt.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        but to be fair, the jacked up part is probably from putting things together on the fly. The messy is just lazy.

      • M. Blitz says :

        The dude i deal with will just casually let slip the most egregious shit. From a policy perspective, ahahah holy SHIT. I can only imagine working for him….he kinda treats the whole program like his personal fiefdom, metes out punishments and works out personal shit via the program. It blows my mind. He just blatantly tells me all these crazy things about how he does shit.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        Is the dude a SEAL? Sounds like a SEAL or some staff weeny trying to sound cool, One of the two.

      • M. Blitz says :

        He aint a SEAL. Civilian former military, but I dont know specifics. He always sounds weirdly medicated and spacey when I talk to him. And brags about cutting peeps off for being “mean” to him. He’s a hot mess, as they say.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        Ohhhhhh, fuck, I discounted the civilian angle. They are the worst after SEALs but before staff weenys.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        and he probably is jacked up. everybody there is on something.

      • M. Blitz says :

        I have found straight up enlisted to be, on the whole, the best to work with. The civilian staff often seem borderline braindead, and a good few of the officers tempt me to exercise my own authority with their tone.

      • M. Blitz says :

        Caveat in defense of civilians. USACE. Organizationally on point for the most part, even if the personalities involved tend to leave a bit to be desired.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        NCO’s are usually the best to work with because they are they ones that know the actual nuts and bolts of how things work. Officers have an overview but most don’t actually do the work and aren’t in place as long as enlisted and NCOs.

      • M. Blitz says :

        And let’s not include nat’l guard in “enlisted is better” cuz they also love to test my patience.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        US Army Corps of Engineers? yeah those dudes are usually wired tight and tightly wound. I can she that their paper work is probably done right.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        Fine by me.

      • M. Blitz says :

        For sure. I get a lot of bluster from Officers and their tantrums almost without fail reveal that they do not grasp the most basic points of how the shit is supposed to function. And that bluster aint gonna work with me.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        doesn’t work with us either.

      • M. Blitz says :

        I am so ready for a break from them all. I got 2 other agencies. Almost 30,000 peeps in this program. And i have to do the contracts, the modifications, the funding advances, the data entry, the training, the policy stuff, the reporting, the individualized customer service. For all 30,000 of them. I am ready to stab myself lol

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        Man that sucks. i can’t wrap my head around it. I couldn’t do it.

      • M. Blitz says :

        The silver lining is that i telework a ton. Our utterly useless management had been looking for ways to get rid of telework, but our cba requires them to have a concrete reason. And everytime they ran the numbers, I ruined it for them by outworking everybody by a TON. And that is just what’s easily quantifiable.

        DC traffic had my commute at 2 hours each way. I work 10’s and start at 630 am. Just to sit in the office and be pestered for reporting and excel help all day long or advice on relationship problems? Not getting home til after 7 but needing to be up at 4? To do a job formerly done by 3 fulltime employees with additional assistance? Nah. Fuck that.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        Screw all that noise.

      • M. Blitz says :

        I may retreat to my natural habitat of 7-11 clerk when/if I hit my 10 year “here’s a teensy pension” point. A girl can dream…

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        ah the 7-11. Always a good stop because of the Coke Icee. I love that in summertime.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        in fact I think I just talked myself into getting one.

      • M. Blitz says :

        Coke slurpees kick ass. Even better if cherry is also available. Get some layers going on!

        You can celebrate your retirement with a free one on 07/11 too!

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        That layering of coke Icees sounds great. Thanks for telling me. It never occurred to me to try that.

    • tombando says :

      Don’t sell off the Hollywood sign while there without cutting us in on the take.

    • Continentalop says :

      Enjoy Hell-A.

      There is a decent soul food restaurant over there called My 2 Cents LA. They used to have a damn good brunch on Sunday.

      Yuko Kitchen is also pretty good. Japanese-fusion. Really good udon noodles.

      While you’re here see how many homeless you can spot. Tip: harder than you think because many are people who live in their cars while still holding down a job.

  39. Continentalop says :

    Ok, I am going to admit it – I am sick of peak TV. There is too many serial format series, and after about halfway thru each one I get bored and it becomes a chore to get thru the entire season. At least with a movie it is only 90-120 minutes and then I can make a judgement; with TV shows nowadays it is like 10 hours. That is like a huge time investment.

    Having said that, I started Dead to Me, and really enjoyed it so far (also enjoying Kim’s Convenience, but that is episodic).

    • Xiphos0311 says :

      you’ve got to really choose what you watch. Now if I have any inkling that the show its gong nowhere I dump it quick. Or I don’t start at all.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        I’ve actually started to appreciate shows like NCIS LA. It stupid it wraps everything up in a bow and it simple. however the actors have good chemistry and it doesn’t require me to invest in it in any way.

      • Continentalop says :

        I am pretty discriminate and brutal now, but a lot of shows like start out great then turn into crap or just sit on the edge until the end when they completely shit the bed.

        I’m beginning to watch more comedy shows, like Barry, Schitt’s Creek, Dead to Me and Kim’s Convenience. 30 minutes is more digestible and they are only like 10 episode long seasons.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        Yeah comedies are good and fast like 22 minuets for the shorter ones.

      • Continentalop says :

        What you appreciated about NCIS LA is what got me into watching Burn Notice. Later seasons sucked, but for the most part was a fun show that you really didn’t have to invest a lot of thought into (yeah, they had big season long arcs, but they weren’t complex arcs).

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        Burn Notice is a better show. A much better show.

      • Continentalop says :

        One show I am looking forward to is Veronica Mars. But I always have apprehensions – that show could very well be a disappointment.

        Hard to come back and strike lightning again.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        Oh man VM has ne both excited and scared. I know they are going off one of the books but they are gong to half to cut a ton of shit to make it work. I told myself I won’t binge it in one day but who am i kidding. i’m a giant fan of the series.

      • Continentalop says :

        Which book are they basing it on? I read The Thousand Dollar Tan and Mr. Kiss & Tell (not bad books either).

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        Thousand Dollar Tan Line looks like. I would be super surprised and impressed if they went ahead and Kiss and tell. That one was dark.

      • Continentalop says :

        BTW I seriously want a Terriers cameo in the Veronica Mars series.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        that would be great.

      • tombando says :

        I have first two years of Burn Notice. Holds up well. There’s a sense of FUN in it at the right spots that is missing in alot of these ‘peak TV’ thingies now.

    • Jarv says :

      Half my problem with TV series at the moment is that they all seem to require inordinate set up periods (GoT took 8 series…)- a prime example was the last season of the Good Place (which I love). Took about 4 episodes to set up properly and that left it with fuck all time.

      Seems to be happening more and more.

      Also, the outright wasting of decent source material is getting on my nerves. Good Omens was a decent attempt, but the really egregious one was Altered Carbon, which did monumental damage to the novel, and shat on the sequels for basically no good reason.

      • tombando says :

        I’m personally more happy with stuff like Fringe or Terriers where yes, you DO have common plotlines/threads thruout a season, but you Don’t need to have watched the prior 3 years to know wtf is going on.

        This is why I stopped with the Neftflix Marvel stuff a year plus ago. Just tired of the dog and pony stuff where 6 eps are good, 3 suck and 3 are hideous filler. Just stop.

    • Xiphos0311 says :

      Its who I usually blame along with conservatives. In fact its all fucking politicians since they are all fucking liars and thieves.

    • Jarv says :

      It’s not just the states that has this problem. London is now a pisstake- we’ve had to move out into the counties, because it was absolutely inconceivable that we could afford to live anywhere we’d actually want to live in London. Our stupid planning laws, NImbys, greedy BTL fuckers, and so on have totally gutted large areas of the city- Kensington is now a ghost town apparently.

    • tombando says :

      Gentrification is NOT your friend. They’ve made it too pricey for us peons to live close to work here too, and in S Maine.

      • Continentalop says :

        Gentrification is just killing the big coastal cities. And deindustrialization is killing the rest of the country.

        I hate to say it, but Hunger Games kind of nailed it with the impoverished Precincts and the annoyingly cosmopolitan & upper class Capital.

  40. Xiphos0311 says :

    Blitz thanks for cluing me in on the Icee swirl. it was great.

  41. Jarv says :

    Crims v Pakistan today. Australia need a win after the India thrashing. Pakistan are still the “fuck knows” side in the competition, and I want them to lose as a matter of general principle.

  42. Judge Droid says :

    This is why the Poms can’t have nice things. Every second match gets rained out.

    Summer in England. I do not miss it.

  43. Judge Droid says :

    I must admit, I am curious…

    • M. Blitz says :

      Me too. First thing I saw this morning when i picked up my phone this morning. I haven’t read the book (yet?)

    • Xiphos0311 says :

      This doesn’t look half bad. On the other hand how many shitty movies have there been that have good to great trailers? Personally I’ve lost count.

    • Anonymous says :

      The book is rancid, apparently

      • M. Blitz says :

        Who said this!

      • Jarv says :

        Me. Stupid iPhone wasn’t logged in

      • M. Blitz says :

        Is there any post-80s King that can be vouched for? I love his 70’s-80’s stuff (havent read it all), but i picked up a short story collection from the 90s and it seemed like the magic was gone.

      • Jarv says :

        Dark tower up to Wizard and Glass

      • Jarv says :

        Insomnia. Now I think about it.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        11-22-63 was good. i was surprised by Kings take on Kennedy’s assination

      • M. Blitz says :

        11-22-63….didnt they make a movie off this? I have a faint memory of adding it to my netflix queue.

        Maybe Dark Tower will be my Summer reading project.

      • Jarv says :

        I would not recommend it. The first three are gold. The fourth is good, but 5, 6 and 7 are fucking awful and actually retcon a load of his other books and make them shit.

        Do not touch Black House. It’s dreadful.

        And if this isn’t enough 7 actively insults the reader. Breaks the 4th wall to tell you to fuck off.

        It’s honestly one of the worst things I’ve read.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        I think Hulu or Amazon did a miniseries of it. It wasn’t good.

      • M. Blitz says :

        Ahhhh ok, yeah won’t be reading it. I can’t go reading a series and having it go to shit for thousands of pages, after reading how many pages already. I’ll feel compelled to continue.

        Not King, but either of you read Drood? A friend is pressuring me. And it sounds intriguing.

      • Jarv says :

        Oh it’s THOUSANDS of pages of utter shit. He writes himself into it as the author who saves the world at one point.

      • M. Blitz says :

        Oh fuck no. That is completely unacceptable. That is ‘throw the book across the room’ level unacceptable.

      • Jarv says :

        It’s awful. Honestly, and I’m not understating it.

        It’s a crying shame because the concept is gold.

  44. Continentalop says :

    Just started watching a show on Netflixs called DamNation. 3 episodes in. Not a masterpiece but pretty interesting. Pulpy but also about a serious subject:

    It’s about the farmer revolts/strikes in the Midwest during the Great Depression (1931). A fake preacher is in town trying to radicalize the farmers who are getting their farms foreclosed, while at the same time Hooverite dick bankers and rich people are sending in Pinkertons and strikebreakers to stop them. Also features the Black Legion.

    • Xiphos0311 says :

      I watched that show last year I think when it was USA Network maybe? It sort of petered out for me and I let the last few episodes linger until I got around to watching them. I think it was cancelled.

  45. M. Blitz says :

    Forgot to mention, saw Rocketman last weekend with my mom. It was really fun! I imagine it would be intolerable if one didnt like the music as it is very much a musical. Could be readily adapted to Broadway. But it was a good time and I dug it.

    • tombando says :

      Oh that’s cool I’m willing to watch it on Netflix or whatever, I like most of Elton’s stuff.

    • Judge Droid says :

      I’ve got no interest in this. Don’t like Elton, don’t like his music and I’ve got my musician-bio fill from the Queen movie. I love Queen and Freddie, but that is a bad movie saved by the music. Unless the Elton John movie is something special, I won’t be bothered.

    • Xiphos0311 says :

      I meant to go see that last weekend but for a variety of reason mostly centering on me being lazy I didn’t go. your mini review has renewed my interest so maybe I’ll check it out tomorrow.

  46. M. Blitz says :

    Has anyone seen this movie?? I vaguely remember that it existed but…..yeah, it sounds amazing.

    https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vibrations_(film)

    A boy whose hands are amputated gets plastic hands that help him ward off a rapist, and he gets rewarded by his new friends with metal hands that are amazing for playing “techno”?!?

  47. Xiphos0311 says :

    I’ve started working my way through the TV series Dr. S. Holmes a.k.a House MD. Its that Hugh Laurie show from the mid oughts. couple of observations upon second viewing while not in a war zone.

    1. Hugh Laurie is outstanding as House I mean he is absolutely watchable and magnetic in the role.

    2. The writing, in the early seasons at least, is superb and deep and tackles a lot of issues that they don’t wrap up easily in 40 minutes.Tthey make the lead character complex and don’t make many excused for his behavior. That is surprising from network TV.

    3. All the supporting characters are fleshed out and with maybe one exception, seem real and the acting is all pretty solid. The one i go back and fourth on id Dr. Cameron she seems a little writer wish fulfillment at times. Then other times she is really good. Maybe it took some time to get the character right in the writing room.

    • M. Blitz says :

      I dug House in the early seasons. After they changed out the docs, completely lost interest. This has NOTHING to do with that one cute doctor (Chase? Am i making that up?) disappearing from the show. Those other docs are annoying. Cameron was already semi-annoying but manageable.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        Yep Chase was the cute one.

        I agree the show lost a lot of its punch after everybody bailed. The early run is really good, however the show did succumb to late season TV disease.

      • M. Blitz says :

        Cutest blonde dude without a voice that makes me giggle (lookin’ at you skarsgard!) everrrr….

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        Chase is on a show now called Chicago FD on NBC. I’ve caught some repeats on TNT I think. He struggles nightly trying to cover up the Australian accent. it seeps through A LOT.

      • Judge Droid says :

        He’s the Aussie Taylor Kitsch. Can’t quite discard his accent. He was also a runner up for Anakin Skywalker, I think. Dodged a bullet there.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        He was in the Anakin sweepstakes? I did not know that.
        You can tell when he’s struggling because he strangles off the ends of words in a sort of rough growl. Thinking about it now makes me realize it would make a great drinking game. Take a shot every time he does it. You would be drunk off your ass by the first commercial break.

      • M. Blitz says :

        He should def keep the accent, it went so well with his face. And he definitely dodged a bullet not playing ol’ Ani.

      • M. Blitz says :

        Dammit I am tempted to watch the show now, to hear this quasi-aussie growl. The show looks extremely boring to me otherwise.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        Yeah its not a good show. Its a background show on TV if I’m at home doing other things. Its really really goofy.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        David Morse.

    • Judge Droid says :

      I binged watched all of House a couple of years ago. You are correct that in the early seasons the writing is great. However, it begins to struggle a bit when it leans on his painkiller addiction. There’s a “conscience” character, for example. And i don’t mean Wilson.

      Cameron is a bit of a wishy washy do-gooder character in the first couple of seasons. Her having a crush on House is a but unrealistic! It does change as it goes along though.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        Its never Lupus!

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        That’s a spot on assessment of House.I completely agree.

        It took them almost 2 seasons to get Cameron in the right direction. I wonder what the problem was. Maybe the actress?

      • M. Blitz says :

        What was that extremely drawn out storyline with the cop that was after House? God that was a slog.

      • Judge Droid says :

        That was season 3. They introduced a few characters specifically intended to antagonise House. Chi McBride in s1 was another. They rightly figured the better story was with House’s addiction and personal demons.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        house was rude to a patient in the clinic who turned out to be a narco detective . The cop got pissed and decided to mess with him a little by pulling him over. House acted like a jerk things escalated and he got arrested. During the shake down the cop found a small stash on House. That let him get a warrant and he found his even bigger stash at home so he hit him with holding mucho weight and dealing.

      • M. Blitz says :

        That storyline felt like it took forever. I cant think of the actor’s name, only his smug face. He’s been in a ton of stuff.

      • M. Blitz says :

        What was the deal with Chi McBride? That isnt ringing any bells.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        McBride character had a pharma company. he gave the hospital 100 million and took over running everything. It didn’t go well.

      • M. Blitz says :

        Ohhhhh yeah. That shit was annoying too. I think I just prefer for House to get his way, take his pills, go about his business, and be charmingly dickishly smarter than everybody. Everytime I recall them straying from that, it was annoying. Even when Cameron or Omar Epps try to get in his way. Tedious.

  48. Judge Droid says :

    Recent viewing (over the past year or two)…
    I’ve rewatched Breaking Bad. Such a great show start to finish. I’m not confident it “nails” the ending, but it generally gets the broad strokes right. And it’s ultimately satisfying. While Cranston occupies most of the space when it comes to acting plaudits, it deserves to be mentioned that Aaron Paul is fucking amazing as Jesse.

    Next is Better Call Saul. Rewatching the great first 2 seasons and then getting into season 3 and 4.

    Cheers – All 11 seasons. Admittedly I watched it mainly as background to doing other things, but as one of the most popular sitcoms of all time, it really wasn’t particularly likeable and only occasionally funny. Sam, Diane, Rebecca, Carla are all amusing but annoying people. Norm, Cliff and Frasier are okay. Coach was occasionally funny but also a victim of the annoying early seasons where they were overdoing the camaraderie a bit. The forced laughing!!! Painful. It was better when Woody came in.

    Frasier – I’ve watched 9+ seasons of Frasier, in the same (mostly background) way as Cheers. But I can say that Frasier is much funnier. David Hyde Pierce is genuinely hilarious as Niles. There’s a sequence in season 9 where the Crane boys are trying to learn how to ride a bike that is visual comedic genius. It’s laugh out loud funny. Niles is a consistently likeable, funny character. Something Cheers struggled with. Cheers made fun of the characters, and expected us to love Sam.

    Frasier finds amusement in the characters flaws.
    Finishing season 10 and 11 in the near future.

    • Jarv says :

      Recent viewing: Aquaman.

      It’s objectively fucking terrible and so so so stupid. But goddamnit it looks pretty and I had fun. Amber Heard is terrible.

      I’d say it’s the most enjoyable DC movie and I think I prefer it to Wonder Woman.

      • Jarv says :

        The other thing- it clearly understands that Aquaman is never, ever going to be cool. Even riding the kraken isn’t cool.

        So it embraced the camp. The suit reveal is a great case in point: “we’ve got to do this, and that suit is fucking ridiculous. Let’s just get it over with as fast as possible and never speak of this again”.
        Like banging a ginger chick when you’re at uni.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        That explains what happened to your soul….

      • Jarv says :

        Ha.

        2 additional things- the Pitbull cover of Africa is fucking painful, and what was the point of casting Nicole Kidman?

      • Judge Droid says :

        It was shot on the Gold Coast I think, so Kidman doesn’t really need to go very far. Especially when the special effects nerds responsible for making her look younger are under the pump.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        I shouldn’t cast stones. I had my soul harvested by a ginger in my teens. Any subsequent regrowth was snuffed out by later ones.

      • M. Blitz says :

        Every ginger chick I’ve known, with one exception, was drop dead gorgeous. Souls are overrated.

      • Jarv says :

        So wrong. I went to uni in Scotland.

      • Judge Droid says :

        It’s a false economy. Every pretty ginger chick is memorable.

        No one ever remembers the many, many forgettable gingers.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        I absolutely agree with that Blitz. Every ginger I’ve ever met except for two, have been amazing looking. Souls smouls not needed.

      • M. Blitz says :

        America must be hoarding the good’uns

    • Xiphos0311 says :

      I prefer BCS to BB just because I had a hard time with Walt being able to get over on the Cartel and DEA. Other then that both are great shows.

    • M. Blitz says :

      Couldn’t deal with Breaking Bad. Loathed Cranston’s character almost as much as I hated his wife and kid. Jesse was the only character I didn’t passionately loathe.

      Sam and Diane and whatever Kirstie Alley’s character’s name was were the worst. Carla, Woody and the various regulars including Frasier and Bebe were the best.

      Frasier is great. Extremely well written. Niles, the dad, Daphne….all great.

    • Xiphos0311 says :

      I too am on the Frasier is great bandwagon. Enjoyed the hell out of that show. I liked Cheers also but not quite as much.

      • Jarv says :

        Also loved Frasier. Hope they don’t bring it back.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        This might be a first, everybody agrees on something, namely Frasier is good.

      • Judge Droid says :

        Walter Chang just turned in his grave.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        I think in the Book of Revelations that means one of the seals has been broken. Better get the Winchesters on that, stat.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        Bringing Frasier back would be a mistake. I know Grammer is pushing hard for because some other reboots have done OK but most have not. Let the show live on as a happy memory. Plus the actor who played Martin is dead and you can’t recast him so that leaves a big hole in the show. His reactions to the Crane boys airs was priceless,

      • Judge Droid says :

        Martin’s reactions were great. He loved them, but really couldn’t believe these 2 were his kids.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        I remember one episode they floated the idea that somebody else might have fathered them but it turned out the potential donor was super super gay. It was a great episode if I remember correctly.

      • Judge Droid says :

        I couldn’t think of that ep, so I googled it. It’s ‘Fathers and Sons’ ep 22 of season 10. Not quite there yet.

        Something to look forward to.

      • Jarv says :

        Have you had the one with no dialogue and Niles ironing? I swear I nearly cried laughing in it.

      • Judge Droid says :

        Yes, that was season 5 or 6 I think. Niles is a hilarious character, and David Hyde Pierce is fantastic.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        yeah that’s the one. I hope remembered correctly that it was a good one.

      • M. Blitz says :

        His facial expressions for expressing disbelief were amazing.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        his face made you feel the exasperation he felt dealing with his upper crusty off spring

  49. Xiphos0311 says :

    Started on Jessica Jones final season this morning but I have no real interest because its already cancelled. I think since its summer I’ll use episodes to fill space, like one here and one there when not watching baseball or the few summer series there are.

    • M. Blitz says :

      That’s one of the only comic book shows I sometimes consider watching. Picked up a couple issues a few years ago and it was meh which prejudiced me against the show.

      I kind of want somebody to adapt Paper Girls. Seems obvious, as it would cash in on both Stranger Things and various cultural “girl power” trends.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        In my opinion its the best of the cancelled Netflix series. JJ has some serious issues which I like in my super folk. Krysten Ritter is really good in the role.
        I wonder which shows the Mouse House will do. They can’t do any of the cancelled ones for two years. I wonder if they will reboot any of them? Probably DareDevil. Maybe they could make a good Iron fist or better yet Heroes For Hire.

      • M. Blitz says :

        2 years was stipulated? It blows my mind how long this superhero movie/show stuff has been big. I’m sure they’ll reboot away.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        yeah Disney can’t use any characters used on any TV shows for two years. Its a non compete clause because Netflix’s has the broadcast rights for that time period.

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