Burt Gummer’s Rec Room January 2011 Archive
A gathering place for firearms enthusiasts, paranoid survivalists and those who worship at the Church of Chang.
Welcome to 2011. Apparently we’re less than 12 months from the Mayan Apocalypse. Best stock up on weapons and other essential survival gear.
Disclaimer: This is the part of the Church that is the most no holds barred. None of it is intended with malice, and although it can on occasion seem a little bit fraught, it is banter rather than venom.
Barfy
kloipy
Echo the Bunnyman
Judge Droid
Jarv
ThereWolf
Xiphos0311
Werewolves On The Moon 
Two words, Frank:
BLACK HELICOPTERS.
Apparently the secret government that rules the world and hides all evidence of the existence of extra-terrestrials also has absolutely silent helicopters that chase after UFOs. It says so on AboveTopSecret.com, and everything they say is the truth
I thought that was a joke- but that site is totally real, and indeed mentions silent Helicopters-
http://www.abovetopsecret.com/forum/thread482402/pg1
Wow.
I’m really curious as to what is the “New World Order” now.
Scary.
Ok Jerry Fletcher.
Depending on your point of view, the NWO is either a secretive of cabal of rich folks who are actually space lizards or a gang of burly wrestlers lead by Hulk Hogan.
Both are equally daft.
Could it be both?
A secret cabal of burly wrestlers who are actually space lizards. Led by Hulk Hogan, natch. Hulk for President!
I may review all the Hulk Hogan films. That would be some challenge, because as I recall they all, without exception, suck like a dyson.
Who’s Jerry Fletcher?
Learn your Mel Gibson roles god damnit. I don’t know how many times I need to tell you people that.
Thanks for the hint. I now know that you’re talking about Conspiracy Theory, which brings me to 3 important points as to why I shouldn’t remember it:
1)It has Julia Roberts in it
2)Mel is fucking terrible in it.
3)It’s a terrible and annoying film that I will never see again.
I fucking LOVE AboveTopSecret.com. I used to enjoy Rense.com, but it got so anti-Semitic it became a kind of hate site with UFO afterthoughts. At least ATS hasn’t gone full retard… yet. And as a site that stimulates the imagination, it can’t be beat.
UFOWatchdog.com was the best of them all. Totally sceptical, dedicated to exposing the charlatans fleecing the faithful, and in the end it kind of shut down (kind of because it’s still up, but only as an archive site) because the owner got so pissed off with how subjective and gullible UFO believers are with new stories that he just quit trying to be the smart, scientific site because no-one wanted ot hear it. Chalk one up for the tinfoil-hatted nutjobs…
Caught Secretariat last night. It was ok, I was hoping the non horse racing stuff would be better. Outside of the two horse races it has a very DTV feel about it. The acting isn’t that great and the melodrama is weak. But those two horse races were a lot of fun. In the end I liked The Fighter, and probably Seabuiscuit more. I need to see Seabuiscuit again but I remember really liking it. Seabiscuit has a much more dramatic story to him. I’d say Secretariat was more fun, but some of the acting was pretty cheesy.
Also I was hoping for a more engaged John Malkovich, he just sort of bumbles around and speaks some random French, like he couldn’t wait to be done for the day to go cash his check.
A quick catch up…
Transporter 1 – Entertaining
Transporters 2 and 3 – Crap, and I canned the third one about halfway through.
Name of the King – Unseen
Crank and Crank 2 – Crank blows. No interest in Crank 2: Crank Harder
Bank Job – Unseen
Expendables – Okay. The Stath is probably the best thing about it.
Death Race – Utter shit.
Stuff in movies that annoy me…
Alcohol – I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone do a tequila/whisky shot and not grimace even slightly. The shit does not taste nice when you shot them. But boozy scenes in films show people downing shot after shot with no visible reaction. Also, I’ve seen many times when a character repeatedly drinks directly from a bottle (usually whisky) in swigs large enough to kill a rhino. Now I’ve only seen this done twice in real life, and both times the individual responsible was a complete fucking mess in about 30 minutes and useless for at least 24 hours afterwards. Which brings me to hangovers. After a massive night on the tiles, you cannot simply “freshen up” and feel 100%. It takes a ritual of painkillers, water, coffee, english breakfast, couch and hair of the dog to do so. If movies even bother to address a hangover, it’s a momentary “character appears tired, with crazy hair” scene after which they’re completely fine.
Animal Kingdom – I can understand the reaction to the performance of James Frecheville, but I see it as this. He’s a cub being introduced to a pack of wolves. He’s unsure, intimidated, and has to learn to fend for himself to ensure his survival. The pack of wolves on the other hand see him as a tool for their survival. He’s someone they can manipulate into doing things like stealing a car, by a) reinforcing “family loyalty” and b) reminding him that they’re all he’s got. He’s a 17 year old kid. Awkward around much stronger personalities. His journey is one of a boy to manhood. If he doesn’t stand up and be his own man he’ll end up like Darren, the weak brother who gets pushed around. The reason you’ve identified the end as his strongest moment is that the film, and the performance, was designed that way.
More of you should see The Bank Job, but make sure you have a DVD with the deleated scenes on it. Its Roger fucking Donaldson for fucks sake Droid.
I’ve always meant to see it. Never got around to it though.
Eh its ok, I’m just saying. Probably my least favorite Statham film, feels like you lot would like it though. BUT DON’T MISS THE DELEATED SCENES!
Wait no its better than Transporter 3/War/Crank 1. And probably Name of The King.
Apart from Die Hard with a Vengeance where McClane (only so he could solve the weakest clue in Action Movie History) had a hangover that lasted all day.
I thought about DH3 while writing that. But to be honest, his hangover comes and goes.
It does, but it’s there- and at least it is addressed.
It’s tequila that bugs me, I have had shots of whisky and not grimaced, but I have NEVER (particularly without limes) seen someone drink Tequila and not pull a face.
I think all Transporter movies have some entertainment value in them, but the first is clearly the best.
Name of the King should be kept on the unwatched list.
I don’t like the Crank films either…
Bank Job – good movie.
Expendables – I enjoyed this a hell of a lot.
Death Race – I thought it was okay.
And very true about the whole alcohol in movies, since the consequences are never actually realized. Fuck, in Going the Distance, Justin Long should have missed a day of work after all the shots he was knocking back after he was pissed off at Barrymore.
I’ve had hangovers where I was pretty fucked and forced to wake up at 6AM the next day to go to military shit. I wasn’t “fine” but I got my shit done. And I didn’t take pills, and maybe got breakfast. I’ve gone into work hungover as shit before as well.
I used to be able to do that, back when I was 19-20 years old. Maybe it’s just because it’s getting harder and harder after a big night that I find it more annoying.
Yeah that was back in my early 20s.
Now its more getting up and hanging around the house pretending to my wife that I’m not as hungover as she thinks. I wonder if thats why she always is able to find outside work that needs to be done for some reason after a night of heavy drinking.
You think?
Actually, I’m lucky in that I don’t really get them (or didn’t when I was younger) as badly as most. Mrs. Jarv thinks it is both intensely annoying and grossly unfair. Many was the time I’d turn up at the Label having had precisely 45 minutes sleep.
I would pretend I had a big export order going out and go for a pleasant nap in the Warehouse for a few hours.
Nowadays, sadly, if I do get a hangover, it fucks me for at least a day.
The only thing in all the hangovers I’ve had, that I’ve learned is that they are gone by 5PM. So usually ALL fucking day I’m just waiting for 5PM to roll around and I know I’ll be fine. Its odd, but its like 5PM on the dot and I’m good. I know thats pretty much ALL fucking day, but at least that means I can drink again that night is the circumstances call for it.
Yes, we all have at some point, but you feel and looked horrible. In most cases, that isn’t what happens in the movies. Droid is right, they just bounce right back like nothing happened. Sorry, but the really bad hangovers stick with you.
I’ve had to get up at 6 before too, and this was back when I worked at a printing company, I would help the warehouse guys on Saturdays driving the forklift around. I was lucky (a) I didn’t run over someone and (b) throw up all over the forklift. My boss of course completely knew I was all banged up from the night before.
Droid, I am in 100% agreement with you on the tequila/whiskey face that movies never show. I have known some heavy drinkers in my life – one of them is passed out right about now on his pillow – paws in the air, empty bottle of jack dangling from his flippy lips – but I have never known anyone who can take a giant swig from a bottle of whiskey without a noticeable facial reaction.
Tequila is the sneaky bastard of hard alcohol. I have buds that can take 20 shots or more and seem as lucid as your teetotaler grandma myrtle, but the moment they stand up! All hell breaks loose!
From vomiting to defecating to urinating to passing – and some all at once!
I shit you not.
Hollywood does not know how to show the real drunk
I can drink anything that isn’t tequila. I still grimace with any neat spirit.
That’s just what people do. It is a poison after all
Apart from Tequila, funnily enough. Which makes me sick.
Instantly.
Tequila has a weird effect on me. I can knock back several shots while sitting, be completely fine, then get up to go and dance or whatever – wham. Spud on floor. Legs are pissed to the point of passing out, everything above the waist is compos mentis. Completely mental.
The most evil shot these days is the Jagerbomb – lethal stuff. I’ve never had Jagermeister straight, so have no idea WTF it is, but mixed with Red Bull to make a Jagerbomb, you get a shot that makes you very pissed very quickly (3 JBs and I’m out, friends) but has so much energy drink in it that you are forced by the caffeine hit to stay awake and suffer every hideous stage of the inevitable vicious hangover.
Yes, Jagerbombs are evil…
I’ve only done a sesh on Jaeger (no RB, just shots) once and it didn’t really affect me that much. I used to use Jagerbombs as either a pick me up, or a catch up. Haven’t done one in ages. Probably since I went to Greece 18 months ago.
As a rule I can hold my booze well under the condition that I stick to the same thing. If I chop and change from beer to wine to spirits then it’s all over red rover.
Jaeger, jager whatever – just godawful.
Tastes like fermented black licorice with cheap whiskey added for effect.
This may be apocryphal – but I was told that Germans laugh the heines off at Americans for drinking and paying for what they consider garbage liquor.
I totally agree.
But it does get people wasted.
I went through a jaeger phase for a while. My mom is German and she thought it was weird, because she knows it as like Deer Blood and something as an after meal liquor, not something to chug and get drunk to. She thought it was gross.
In my early 20s I went through all sorts of alcohol. Now a days I stick mostly with rum. Mainly because you can mix anything with it and it works.
White or dark rum?
white rum, because its slighty better for you. But I’ll get spiced rum every now and then. I got a run a couple months back called the Krakken. Mainly so everytime I had some of it I could say I’m released the Krakken.
FUCK I really wanna try that Sink the Bismark beer. Have any of you guys tried it? Man I found a beer the other week, you’ll probably laugh at it, FUCK i think its called Murphys Irish Red Ale. FUCK its good. Its the cloestest I’ve tasted to a bottle beer that taste like it came from a tap.
I will say this about England, you guys know how to bar. Like in England/Scotland you have real bars, like the ones you see in fucking Cheers. In America bars are usually just loud as fuck for some reason and full of college kids, or they are places where you probably shouldn’t be and I usually filled with smoke. Sure there are some bars in the bigger cities that are more quite, but in England they are everywhere.
I’ve only come across a couple of dark rums that are drinkable. But they are delicious. Spiced rum is an occasional short lived treat. But there not much on a hot summers day that beats a white rum (like Bacardi), in a tall glass with ice, lemonade, and fresh lemon and lime crushed. It’s fucking delicious and refreshing. Yum.
Yeah you sound pretty gay about your drinks. Sounds nice, but I’m a lot more primitive when it comes to hard alcohol. RUM/ICE/MIXTURE….no MIXTURE then RUM AND ICE, stir with my finger. Well wait, my wife bought a bag of 500 straws a year ago, so I do now drink my mix drinks with a straw.
Its always funny going to the bar with my wife, she always has to have these fucking fruit explosions of drinks and I’m always just…RUM AND COKE. She always wants me to taste her shit. Ugh can’t do fucking sweet drinks.
ONE girly drink I like, and laugh all you want because I saw this on the Jersey Shore, is a fucking margarita with a beer dumped into it, that shits good.
Says the guy who drinks white rum because it’s “slightly better for you”.
HUZZAH! I made a “says the guy” funny.
HEY! HEY! HEY! If I wanna make it to 40 and not watch what I eat, I at least have to pay attention to something I put in my body.
Like my wife has all this fucking alcohol around the house but its all shit I won’t drink because it’s mainly stuff you need to make mixed drinks. We go to the liquor store and I’ll just got a bottle of rum and she’s like what will you mix it with? I’m like, we got water at home right?
My buddy did get me into straight whiskey, this week feels like I may need to pick up a bottle of it. Gotta sip that though. Like last time I was at a family reuion all my uncles were just doing whisky and some water and I was like FUCK, I’ll stick with beer.
Rum and water. You’re a sophisticated guy, koutch.
I got a bottle of champs at the seminar last weekend. Fuck knows when the hell I’ll drink that.
As a genuine suggestion: England v Sri Lanka at Lords in May. I think it’s at Lords anyway. There’ll be a cheap day like with Bangladesh.
Drinking isn’t about sophistication its about vomiting.
Poof.
I was like 15?
And?
Talking about whisky, I need to go and buy a bottle of The Black Grouse.
That just makes you a 15 year old poof.
Why The Black Grouse?
I need a bottle of something. Starting to feel like shit. Overworked and beginning to feel ill. Bastards.
It’s nice and is on Special offer for £13 in Morrisons.
As good a reason as any I suppose.
Everyones a poof at 15.
HA! Is that what he told you?
That was what Droid said on the stand. The jury didn’t buy it then either.
Bastard. Beat me to it.
I’ve only known one dude that wasn’t a poof at 15, and he’s a mercenary now, and has become strangely religious. Last time I hung out with him we were driving on the outskirts of DC in his car and he magically pulled out 5 guns hidden around his vehicle. We had to park it before we went into DC because of the gun laws there.
I’m severely concerned with this tendency of yours to hang around with 15 year old homosexuals. It’s deeply wrong.
If you could see Koutch right now he’d be doing this to you…
Hrmmm between your vast Dido knowledge and your ability to have that picture at the drop of a hat, and your choice of a fancy alcohol drinks and love of the sport of women’s basketball and love of the movie Black Swan. I’m pretty sure your a fat lesbian.
Well, I am getting a bit fat and I do like women, so I guess you’re right.
Well I lived in England when I was 15, it was the norm there.
It isn’t. We just tell naive Americans that the really cool bars are ones frequented by ring pirates and that it’s OK to experiment.
It keeps them out of pubs we want to go to.
Yeah in the land where bender on a bun is a family meal, and spotted dick is a everyday dessert. England is all about 45% or greater poof. Droid at least can say he was born in Australia, where prison rape is just a way of life.
I’ve never heard of Bender on a Bun.
I can’t argue about spotted dick, though, except point out that these kind of charming anachronisms are very common in places with history and culture. However, the best anachronism ever is that there used to be a street in London called “Gropecunt Lane”.
There’s also a hill outside Glasgow called The Bastard and brilliantly a town called “Twat” in the north somewhere. You grow up tough if you’re from there.
Yeah in the land where bender on a bun is a family meal, and spotted dick is a everyday desserts. You know England is all about 45% or greater poof. Droid at least can say he was born in Australia, where prison rape is just a way of life.
I’ve only known one dude that wasn’t a poof at 15, and he’s a mercenary now, and has become stragly religious. Last time I hung out with him we were driving on the outskirts of DC in his car and he magically pulled out 5 guns hidden around his vehicle. We had to park it before we went into DC because of the gun laws there.
white rum, because its slighty better for you. But I’ll get spiced rum every now and then. I got a run a couple months back called the Krakken. Mainly so everytime I had some of it I could say I’m released the Krakken.
FUCK I really wanna try that Sink the Bismark beer. Have any of you guys tried it? Man I found a beer the other week, you’ll probably laugh at it, FUCK i think its called Murphys Irish Red Ale. FUCK its good. Its the cloestest I’ve tasted to a bottle beer that taste like it came from a tap.
I will say this about England, you guys know how to bar. Like in England/Scotland you have real bars, like the ones you see in fucking Cheers. In America bars are usually just loud as fuck for some reason and full of college kids, or they are places where you probably shouldn’t be and I usually filled with smoke. Sure there are some bars in the bigger cities that are more quite, but in England they are everywhere.
white run, because its slighty better for you. But I’ll get spiced rum every now and then. I got a run a couple months back called the Krakken. Mainly so everytime I had some of it I could say I’m released the Krakken.
FUCK I really wanna try that Sink the Bismark beer. Have any of you guys tried it? Man I found a beer the other week, you’ll probably laugh at it, FUCK i think its called Murphys Irish Red Ale. FUCK its good. Its the cloestest I’ve tasted to a bottle beer that taste like it came from a tap.
I will say this about England, you guys know how to bar. Like in England/Scotland you have real bars, like the ones you see in fucking Cheers. In America bars are usually just loud as fuck for some reason and full of college kids, or they are places where you probably shouldn’t be and I usually filled with smoke. Sure there are some bars in the bigger cities that are more quite, but in England they are everywhere.
My wife and I travel to the BVI quite often, so we have imbibed more than a few Rums.
It is hard to pin down my absolute favorite, but I would say a true aged Rum Like Cruzan or Centenario are my top choices.
The most popular rum in the BVI is Pussers – they have a very long English navy tradition, as well as some great stores.
Pussers is the most popular rum in the most popular drink the Painkiller – oh yeah!
But Pussers is garbage without the coco lopez.
Is Pussers Rum like a stright rum? It looks like beer?
Koutch’s most favouritist rum.
HEYO! Knew that joke was coming. I’ve had it, its really good actually. But I prefer my run to come in plastic bottles and under $10 for a gallon.
Yeah, I was weighing up whether to use it or not. I thought why not. I’ve actually had it as well. It’s pretty decent.
I did think it was called Mt. Grey for the longest time. I never actually read the bottle, that or that word doesn’t read in my vocab. At the liquor store before christmas I saw that they came out with like a primium bottle of rum and I told my wife if she didn’t know what to get me get me a big ole bottle of gay.
You guys tried the Crystal Skull Dan Aykroyd vodka yet?
Mt Grey is from, erm, I think Grenada. or Barbados. Fuck somewhere like that. I seem to remember it being quite nice when I was in there
No it isn’t. It’s straight rum.
You know what I mean. Is it just RUM are is it some rum mixture?
Eh I guess looking at those pictures again it was just a weird perspective. I thought the bottles looked like beer bottles but I’ve found other pictures where it’s clearly just rum.
Mount Gay Rum really is quite good. I would put it in my top ten.
Pussers is not a spiced rum- it is a single malt garbage rum, but they make good rum cake, and cheap painkillers, and they have an awesome store.
Damn, without a doubt I will be brewing up a batch of painkillers for the superbowl!
I hope i can make it through the game!
You going for the Steelers TKD?
Doctor prescribes one Jagerbomb per quarter to keep you awake.
Steelers vs Packers. I’m snoring already.
Ohh yeah thats another thing about Jager, is that its meant to put you to sleep. My mom’s like why would you mix that or drink that? You have a sip before you go to bed.
Jager is basically a tonic wine like Buckfast etc. The nearest to it in taste is Sambucca, but as a rule Jager is NOT meant to be drunk like this.
Funnily enough, drinks like Galliano, or Goldschlager ARE meant to be drunk like this.
I thought Buckfast was come caffined tonic?
No. It’s a tonic wine made by monks beloved by Glasweigen alcoholics.
Fucking lethal stuff. It’s like Benedictine. Horrible but deadly.
Droid, thou does not knowest thy American Football.
The Steelers and Packers played the single greatest game of last season, and incredible back and forth aerial circus over 900 yards in offense.
No, i doubt it will be anything like that this time – but we can hope, but these two teams will get it on.
The last time the Steelers played in Superbowl against the cardinals (sorry Xi) it was one of the greatest games ever.
When Carolina played the Patriots it was supposed to be the snore bowl, turned into one pf the best ever.
Same with Titans and Rams.
I expect a great game, but i will say that the Steelers played in one of the dullest superbowls ever against the seahawks, so i will still have some painkillers just in case
Thats probably true there, toad. It’s just that I couldn’t give two hoots about either the packers or the steelers. And EliRothturdburger is a cunt.
If it were the Cowboys, Pats, Titans or hell even the Jets because we’ve got a couple of fans here I’d be interested.
I won’t be interested in Football untill it resembles whatever they fucking played in Starship Troopers.
Jarv, The Steelers and Packers are my tow favorite teams after my hometown Jints.
I will be happy if either wins, I just want an entertaining game.
Both teams are banged up though, but I give Steelers the slight edge – not because of experience, but because I think the D is superior and will impose their will.
Green Bay D is great though, and will defintely have a huge impact.
Rodgers is a tremendous talent, but he can be slowed and neutralized by a great D. The bears did it twice – if only the had an offense.
The Eagles are by no means a great D but they had a chance to win late.
I think Big Ben give Steelers the edge with game on the line.
It will be close
Bring on the Painkillers!
I may need to have ‘practice’ run this weekend just to make sure my skillz have not diminished
Can’t stand cryboys Droid, just can’t stand them.
The most hated team in NFL – maybe only the Pats come close.
I hate Jerry Jones. I hate the cryboys .
hehe
They’re my two fav teams! I also really like the Titans because of Steve McNair. Blood guts and glory! Shame what happened to him.
My last comment is awaiting moderation -what I say?
Itty Bitty Titty Committee has finished downloading.
Tonight, I take my first tentative steps into the brave new world of lesbian drama. And I don’t mean the kind of lesbian drama where Cindy and Candy are bored one day and decide to take their skimpy clothes off and explore one another’s genital geography.
Yeah your fucked movies awful. Time to download The Rocket.
After that celebration of crew cut, plaid shirt, cargo pants lesbians you can man up and watch Commando.
“What are you expecting?”
“World War III!”
Godspeed son.
So I finally watched Defendor last night, which was pretty good. I have to agree, Woody was very good. I much perfer this over say Zombieland, which I wasn’t crazy about.
Check out the movie Special. Its a similar idea, I liked it better.
Oh, well that’s convenient, it’s on instant play.
Duly added.
haha cool. Hey if you are interested I think Enter The Void just came out on instant play yesterday. We are talking Netflix right?
Yeah, and I’ve had it on instant for a while now, just haven’t gotten around to it.
Cheesy films generally win out on instant viewing.
So……….did any of you fucks go see the new Tron movie?
Yep. Loved it. Totally ripped off the MATRIX movies (all philosophy after the initial burst of action) but gave the movies an added dimension of depth (and I don’t mean the 3D) it didn’t have before. The score is a thing of beauty (and I fucking HATED Daft Punk before), and so is olivia Wilde. All in all, it’s not the movie I expected, and God knows the action sequence at the end made no sense whatsoever, and certain plot points aren’t covered in nearly enough depth for us to give a shit about (so why are ISOs so important again? And WTF would happen if the bad guy army managed to get through the I/O tower, anyway?), but it’s pretty, it looks and sounds great, it’s blatantly obviously Act I of a three-act trilogy that could be AWESOME (seriously – where LEGACY ends, the story could go in ANY direction), and Jeff Bridges is having fun playing a hippie caught living in cyberspace.
It’s not the instant modern classic it was trumpeted to be, but TRON: LEGACY is still a great way to while away two hours. The 3D isn’t all that, though.
Philosophy in the Matrix? Leave it out.
This is the most inane comment that’s bandied about about that film. One of the reasons that the Matrix is such a failure (outside of the action) is that they pose the question “is it better to be aware of the real situation”, and then categorically point out that it is obviously better to not know. They paint “reality” as being so fucking awful compared to being asleep in a pod in The Matrix that the answer is so fucking blatant (i.e. Ignorance is bliss), and then they have one of the fucking characters spell it out.
The philosophy in it would embarrass an A-Level student.
AWESOME! Glad you love it to. I did as well.
When I first saw it it was Thursday evening and I was tired as fuck, and I knew I really liked it but was too tried to really get into it. So I knew i had to see it again. I saw it like a week later, better rested and this time in 2D. I liked it better in 2D. I want to see it one more time in 3D and less tired, its only showing in 3D now. I loved that score as well still can’t believe that it wasn’t nominated. Because even if you DIDN’T like the score, why not have fucking either two french dudes are two dudes in giant robot helmets sitting in the Oscar audience the whole time! GOD! Complete fail on the academy voters, just a total lack of sense of fun on their part.
I have no problem if they never make another Tron movie, sure its the start of a story but it also stands on its own as a complete story which a few loose threads.
Ah, Jarv. Some of us would rather deal with a miserable truth than a beautiful lie. That’s kind of what the Matrix was REALLY getting at – yes, the sleeping masses THOUGHT they were happy, but they weren’t REALLY living – they were just dreaming. This dovetails nicely with DREAM A LITTLE DREAM that I mentioned in THE LOST BOYS thread – if you could go and leavfe this life to live forever in a dream, would you? STAR TREK – GENERATIONS also had this dilemma – Kirk was living in the Nexus with the dream of his wife, but he knew she was really dead – so that knowledge was what drove him out of the Nexus and back into real life. We’re only truly human when we’re dealing with reality, no matter what reality it is – anything is better than a lie. Yes, the Matrix seemed to make people like Cypher happier – but he was a shit anyway. Psychologically it seems almost masochistic, but I think a larger proportion of humanity than you think would want to be free of the Matrix than stay living in it.
When I hear the viewing figures for THE X FACTOR, then my belief in what I just said is the most shaken – but I still believe more people would choose to live in the real world. I have to – the other way lies madness…
Started watching the Dead Space movie last night. Its hand drawn not CGI. Jarv you care if you add to your video game series?
I’ll add it, after I get through EARTHWORM JIM!!! (and a whole bunch of other shit)
What’s it like?
hehehe I turned it on at like 2AM I only made it 5 mins. I’ll let you know tonight.
Ohh wait they did show a bunch of previews for the new movie coming out and the new game before the movie. And I remember thinking to myself: in the future I need to make sure NEVER to sign up to be part of some “mining” exploration in space because thats the basis for 99% of all space horror films. Even fucking Moon.
It’s not a mining mission.
It’s a rescue mission to go and save the guys that fucked up on the mining mission.
Still, though, don’t sign up for those either, because if it isn’t a mining mission (Alien) that get toasted, then it’s the poor bastards sent in to rescue them (Aliens).
Say that again now? Remember the movie is the prequel to the game. And the second movie is about going to mine for the left overs of the giant staute thingy (don’t remember what they called it).
I didn’t know it was a prequel.
The second movie takes place between Game 1 and Game 2? Retrieving the marker from the colony and bringing it to the Sprawl?
Could be quite good that.
Well it starts of as a mining mission/to get the marker, which sounds very Alien to me. Then the game is the rescue mission, then the second movie is a discovery/more mining to get the maker again (I’m surprised that Lance isn’t a voice in these things), and I guess game two is another rescue mission?
Its just a visious cycle really. Hrmm I wonder if there is anyway to make some sort of corelation between that aspect of space movies and the initial voyages to find the western passage to india? Possibly not because the Native American’s were’t as powerful as Europeans.
Oh yeah also even in films like Armegedon, its drilling which is pretty much mining. Same difference. So all horror space films involve either ELE’s or mining/rescue of the miners.
It is heavily dependant on Alien. I can spoil it if you want. Game 2 is getting off The Sprawl. Isaac apparently doesn’t want to rescue anyone- he just wants to kill necromorphs and escape.
Event Horizon- no miners. Mind you, that was rescue/ salvage.
Yeah i was trying to rememeber what Event was. I thought it may have been an ELE event (Thats what Pandorum was) then i remember they were just rescuing test pilots….which was probably to set up a space route for mining! Sunshine is ELE.
No it isn’t. It only starts going wrong when they go to the other ship to salvage the payload- it’s rescue. Sort of.
Pandorum is ELE.
Well the whole point of Sunshine is because of an ELE, if they don’t get the pay load done the worlds fuck, the people on the first mission went space crazy because of their mission.
No it isn’t. They have a big debate about whether they should get the payload as it may be risky. Cillian Murphy could have said “fuck it, we’ve got enough” and just trucked on to restart the Sun.
Wouldn’t have been much of a film though
Well thats what I’m saying the WHOLE reason they are in space to begin with is because of an ELE. They didn’t just go to space to rescue the guys, it was because the world was going to die unless they did something. I mean sure its a bit of both, but the initial reason was because of an ELE.
A bit of both.
Point being, profession wise, they’re in space because they’re botanists and physicists or whatnot. It’s when they become salvagers that they get in shit.
Right but none the less the whole reason they are in space to begin with is because of an ELE, they weren’t just sent up there to study shit.
This is getting weird now- Let’s go back to the start:
“in the future I need to make sure NEVER to sign up to be part of some “mining” exploration in space because thats the basis for 99% of all space horror films. Even fucking Moon.”
To which I responded with either mining OR Rescue.
Sunshine is Rescue- they’re rescuing the planet, and then it all goes terribly wrong because they then go to rescue/ salvage from the ship.
Even Alien, actually, is miners who get fucked over because they answer a distress call. (That later turns out to be a warning)
This is, now I think about it, a golden rule for any movie, Space or otherwise: Never answer a distress call. As soon as you do, you’re fucked.
Sorry I came in half way through and said pretty much all films were either mining are they were in space because of a ELE. And they are in space in Sunshine because of an ELE…which then goes into rescue. I think we are saying the same thing just differently.
Still though. On this depth of analysis- basically never do the following things in space:
1) work for a mining company/ have anything to do with mining.
2) try to salvage/ rescue something
3) ever answer a distress call.
Any time you fulfill one of these criteria, that’s it, you’re fucked. The crew of the Nostromo were triply fucked because they did all 3.
It was just funny when I was watching the stuff about Deadspace last night I was thinking….jesus is all we want to do in Space is mine for shit? I guess thats how its gotta start. Even Avatar they are mining for shit. What the fuck were they doing in Jason X? Or that Hellraiser in Space? Or Lep in Space?
Lep in Space they were deliberately trying to kill the Leprechaun
Hellraiser in Space, well most of it is done in Flashback anyway to the 19th Century, but is building the trap for the Cenobites.
Jason X is a salvage crew returning to earth on an Archaelogical dig.
I really like the way they do mining in Dead Space- basically crack a big fucking chunk off the planet and then use the vacuum to filter off the bits you don’t want.
The thing is, Mining is a plausible reason to be messing around on Pandora before taking your R&R in Hell. Nobody is going to bother travelling to another planet to do paperwork etc. You’re not going to go there if you have nothing to gain from it.
Alien, actually, is slightly different in that they’re just mugs that answer a distress call that happen to be miners. They could have been anything.
FUCK! OUTLANDER, they are miners in that as well aren’t they?
Colonists.
Not specifically mining. However, you can bet that mining will be involved. I think the Outlander himself is a farmer.
Actually, don’t be a colonist either- Dead Space has a triple whammy-
Mining ship goes to colony, discovers marker that has wreaked havoc on said colony. Things go tits up for Mining ship, so the Ishimura sends distress signal that attracts rescue party.
We’ve got Colonists getting fucked, then Miners getting fucked, then a distress call, then rescuers getting fucked.
They need to make a space film where they’ve already landed and mind a planet and are just living there and shit goes down. Is there something like that?
You think there would be.
Some thing like where the Colony is just working as per normal (people doing office work and shit) and then some big fucking monster comes in and twats them, forcing a lowly admin temp to tool up and save the day by killing the Big Fucking Monster with office supplies.
Awesome. I’ll work a way to get tits into that premise as well.
Make sure this movie features big guns. BIG FUCKING GUNS!
Yeah. Maybe we need lots of little monsters first that can be despatched with things such as staplers, before he eventually busts open an armament kit containing a REALLY FUCKING BIG FUCKING GUN that he uses to kill mummy monster.
And boobs. There must be a way to get boobs involved. We need boobs.
Could’ve avoided the Danny Boyle Third Act MeltdownTM though.
True
Hip-hip-hooray! More fucking snow today!
Should be a completely enjoyable commute home today!
Well, I just found out today that the project I’ve been busting my gut doing for the past week and a half is going apeshit and I’ll be responsible for a large portion of it to be delivered in less than two weeks. Which means I do not have the reprieve I expected and my days will continue to be far too fucking long.
When you come home does your mum ask:
“What happened to my sweet Droid?”
My mum isn’t delusional. She knows I was never sweet.
The only person standing in your way is you.
Fuck speaking of work. I had some missed thing on this big account I have. And like always all the other members on the account sat around WONDERING what was going on, but didn’t say anything until the day it was due. And I was like….ehhh I didn’t do it? They do this shit all the time, its odd. Like I work in a pretty much non consequential job, so me fucking up and not getting my thing done doesn’t really have any adverse effect on me. But other members on the account, such as the project managers and sales members THINK it does, and they are ALWAYS ready to pass blame. I mean its hard to explain, but they always go crazy and give me these long speeches about how the customer NEEDS THIS DONE! WHY ISN’T IT DONE! Then wonder why I’m not more concerned about getting it done? Or haven’t done more to get it done? Usually I just say “Yes” and agree with them, and then they are just confused and not sure what to do. Because I never get emotional about my job now. Its just funny, because I think these other people on the account maybe work in a more cut throat sector of this buisness than me and don’t realize that I’m not in the same position as them.
No.
They aren’t aware that you exist until you do something that stops the smooth sailing of their worlds. It’s a combination of arrogance and stupidity commonly found in people in sales and whatnot.
No no no. I can totally do something that fucks up the bosses day. And I don’t get in trouble for it. Like I tell everyone pretty much the most important aspect of my job is that I clock in and out on time.
I mean yeah if I was fucking up day in day out maybe something would happen? But like once/twice a month? Eh everyone here is to busy to even fucking notice that. It’s calmed down a bit recently, but for a while we were all working on just moving from fire to fire to put out. So it wasn’t a big deal if shit was fucked.
I guess you didn’t get the memo. It’s just we’re putting new coversheets on all the TPS reports before they go out now. So if you could go ahead and try to remember to do that from now on, that’d be great.
hehe
Nice.
You’ve managed to use that twice in two days for various work related whinges.
Aren’t you heavily exposed to that kind of management douchebaggery what with spreadsheets and whatnot being your thing?
Yeah the longer I work here I’m not sure if Office Space gets funnier or sadder.
Sadder.
It’s so accurate. Particularly the 5 Bosses thing.
I have 4 bosses, and each of them is basically concerned with protecting their position. Not to mention that I’m directly answerable to head office. It’s a fucking mare, and I spend half my time in meetings explaining that the reason I haven’t done such and such was because I was, er, in a meeting with one of the other ones. To which I always get told that they’ll “sort it out” before the next day I’m called in to an emergency crisis meeting of some description about nothing in particular (certainly nothing that could count as a crisis) and have to answer the same fucking question to the next manager. It’s so annoying. Piss off and leave me alone to do clever things with the website, it’s why you hired me after all.
What pisses me off right. Is that I have a job as I like to call it, thats in a position with all of the power but none of control. Like everything has to filter through me for this shit to work, but I have no ability to make it happen faster/better. I’m stuck following these set in place policies. BUT my boss and his boss they have the ability to just e-mail somepeople and shit gets done. BUT! For that to happen I have to have gone through all my stupid processes. But say an account manager/customer gets pissy and doesn’t want to wait for me to work through my processes, even though I tell them WE HAVE TO DO THAT! They can just call up the chain of command, and then the higher ups ALWAYS fucking cave in.
I had this same problem with my last job, and I get its part of how jobs work. That the lower level people are forced to put pressure on the clients/customers to sit around and deal with our policies, but the second that client/account manager whatever starts acting up everyone bends to their will. So in the end I just look like some asshole, but I was never in a position of power to grant anything to begin with. The only issue with my job now as compared to before, people here don’t seem to make a real distinction between me and my boss. At least with my last job people knew that there was a difference. Here the second people get mad they’ll send e-mails to my boss/his boss/her boss and like five other bosses. Then I’m just like…fuck it someone else who can actually do something will take care of it jesus.
What the hell? That sounds horrendous.
Yeah the problem is that my job is easy, so I sort of got sucked in. And I make enough money to get buy so I got lazy. I’ve got two degrees and you don’t even need a degree to work here. I just got fucking sick of applying for jobs. There isn’t a bigger pain in the world then applying for a fucking job.
I know. I jumped at the chance to use it again.
I do deal every now and then, but for the most part I decide shit pertaining to my specific role, what and how I distribute things.
Still, though.
Management always are petty bureaucratic wankers. Doesn’t matter what industry.
I think we can all safely say that all our jobs blow.
I received an email from a terrible magazine asking if they could do a feature on us in return for some ad space. This is the same magazine that I got rinsed out for not booking us in to back in October. So, I saw a chance to score some points (being all proactive and whatnot) and took it to the boss, who said “I don’t really care about them, and they’re not the right audience” to which I replied genuinely astonished- “but you wanted us in that in October”.
Could not believe it. I work for complete fools.
Your job sounds like it revolves around incompetence (not yours, management).
The problem I have is that I simply have too much to do and there’s no one else that can do it.
Not to mention the fact that I’m grossly underpaid by these cunts.
ahhh…home for snow. delightful.
Let the Lynching continues.
Son of a bitch.
Anyway- did you see the Dumplings review? I think you’re the only person apart from me that’s seen it.
Just responded Jarv.
Has anyone here seen the series ‘On the Air’?
Sigh..everytime I see someone mention Sunshine, it makes me sad. Damn you blurry crispy burnt man!
To top off todays work discussion. Right now I can here someone fucking snoring. And earlier today someone in my row of cubes had there fucking head down on their desk for the better part of the morning.
I fell asleep at work a bit ago. Mind you, I did have swine flu
Just leaving work now. Yay. Ain’t life a blast!
Shit man.
My job blows, but yours takes the piss.
And I’m home!
Now to whip up something to eat and celebrate the last few hours of Australia Day by watching Animal Kingdom again.
Jarv, single file link if you wish to acquire the Dead Space animated movie.
http://tinyurl.com/6azvsqp
HA! The ship is called the USG O’Bannon. Nice little homage to Alien there.
Also is this pre-Ishimura?
Outstanding. I’ve got the last part of The Roost downloading now. I shall procure that straight afterwards
Plans changed. Its my favourite comedy of all time. The Aussie classic The Castle.
FUCK! I recorded that a while back based off your recomendation of it, need to watch it. Hrmmmm wifes going out this weekend. I’m thinking a comedy marathon:
The Castle
The Party
Angles and Idiots
Role Models
and when I’m nice and drunk Dance Movie.
Sound good? Or should I finish Rubicon?
I vote for the comedy marathon. And then you can do some more of your adventure reviews. Although most of those are good. Haven’t seen Angels and Idiots.
Angels and Idiots is the new Bill Plympton movie. Its showing at the art theater. I’ve read some stuff about it, he said its not totally funny, but I know Bill so I’m assuming it’ll have a dark humor to it.
Oh cool Angles and Idiots is a TERRY GILLIAM presents movie.
THE CASTLE FTW!!!
Damn I love that movie. Makes me grin like an idiot. I’ve seen it a million times and I still laugh out loud all the way through.
Not for any particular reason, aside from that I’m in a pretty evil mood, but I’ve been thinking about something: I really hate Dido.
There are so many things that I hate about her, from that her parents were deluded and pretentious enough to name her after the legendary queen of Carthage, or the fact that she’s a minor aristo that only got her break in music because her brother was part of Faithless (and the useless part of it), to the fact that she looks and sounds like a very annoying home counties twat, to that she sued Eminem because she didn’t think he gave her enough money for sampling her dismal “Thank you” in Stan.
However, what really gets to me is that she warbles away in the most dull and uninteresting music for middle class lawyer types to listen to at dinner parties. It’s unspeakable, really, and the very fact that she has managed to sell x-million albums of music that makes Nora Jones sound edgy makes me want to kick a puppy.
So, fuck you Dido, you’re talentless and need to bugger off and do some gardening like Kim Wilde.
So, what you’re saying is that you don’t want to Take My Hand and wave the White Flag? Is it because you Don’t Believe In Love? Or is that One Step Too Far? I’m guessing All You Want are Quiet Times because it Feels Like Fire and you have Everything To Lose so instead you get Stoned and Don’t Leave Home.
hehe
I’m distressed that you can cycle off that many Dido tracks.
Have you ever seen the spoof Dido video which has her killing herself in various different ways the chorus is “I’m just not a happy bunny”.
Dido= The Smiths but female.
My good friend Wikipedia helped me a lot with that. I knew White Flag, Stan and Thankyou.
I quite liked Norah Jones’ first album (the only one I’ve heard).
Hey, wait a second, why is Jarv hating Dido?
Have we all been launched back in time to the year 2000?
Does this mean I’m ten years younger? Have I been given the opportunity to avoid getting married and, even better, skip watching two out of three Star Wars prequels?
What the eff is going on? Does anyone here know about science, specifically as it relates to time travel?
I’ve been listening to Faithless “To all new arrivals” and she appears on about 4 of the tracks.
I’ve changed my mind again, as albums go, it is in fact, quite poo. I think I was confused by two tracks that are OK.
You got married?
I knew that. I think Frankie mentioned it way back in Twitch days.
It’s the word “Avoid” that suggests that it didn’t go so well. And that he talks about “significant lady friend” as well.
Yes, I got married, way back in the before time, in the long long ago. I don’t recommend it.
A tiny monkey cannot function if he’s forced to drag around a ball and chain.
I’ll tell Mrs. Jarv you said that about wives= ball and chain.
Fine by me. Just be prepared for me sitting on your couch wearing this.
HAW Jarv made a Kim Wilde reference!! Kids in America!!! that’s a riot. Oh and there was that ’87 biggie ‘You Keep Me Hanging On’ remake as well. Dido Hulk>Kim Wilde Hulk.
Is Dildo still a fucking live? I haven’t heard that bitch since the M&M Stan song.
This upcoming Twilight film in which Bella and Edward fuck, will Kristen Stewart be showing boob?
I only ask because I’d like to see her boob.
No.
They will not.
Does Kristen Stewart only have one boob? Don’t they usually come in pairs?
Watched Itty Bitty Titty Committee last night.
It’s a very rough around the edges indie film – along similar lines to the earlier stuff Richard Linklater and Kevin Smith did – but about lesbians. It’s alright, I suppose. I liked seeing one of these indie things from a lesbian perspective and it had some charm to it.
I am, however, reasonably confident no one here would like this film. Because you’re all so extremely virile and manly and spend your days eating raw steak and breaking rocks with your bare, manly hands and so on. This film is simply not manly enough for the likes of you.
Any gratuitous acts of lesbian sex?
Curious minds must know!
Brief gratuitous acts of lesbian sex, some boob. Not enough to make the film worth your while, though.
Pah. I shall avoid it then.
Any violence, sweary words or BIG FUCKING GUNS? Because if not, then I’ll certainly duck it.
More importantly, does anyone call a rottweiler “dickhead”?
Awesome.
I suppose I could let them all pass, provided that the angry dykes are being angry at a rat monster that may or may not be satan, and if it is the Devil, then “he’s in deep shit”.
The postman just arrived with Supernatural season 4, which I got off Amazon for the bargain price of £11.93. Good timing, too, because I only have one episode of season 3 left.
So far, season 3 is my favourite, although I was very disappointed they killed off Bela. I liked her, she was evil, sexy and posh, which is an excellent combination. Apparently, she was killed off because fans didn’t like her, but I do not remember anyone asking me about that. I demand to be consulted about these things!
On the season 4 extras there are commentarys (at least there are on the bluray) and they talk a little about how they had to speed up the story and drop/delay other things in season 3 because of the writers strike.
They also talk about how much the “online community” hate pretty much any female character in the show. They were apparently particularly harsh towards the second iteration of Ruby. Which I think probably stems from jealousy from viewers (both male and female) who want to bone Jared Padelecki.
Really? In that case, the online community can kiss my ass.
Damn you, online community! Some of us like to look at attractive women on television programmes!
I’m with the monkey. I liked Bela too–arguably the best female character on the show outside of Ellen and her daughter. At least she has a poignant/tragic wrapup, but it seems like a waste of a character. It’s obvious that she was brought in and the fans hated her and then she was disposed of.
Droid is right about those fans. I was reading an article regarding Jim Beaver–who plays Bobby–a few months back and the comments section under the article had nothing to say about Jim or Jensen’s directed episode, but was all about how Jensen and Jared’s new wives must be chilly, conniving whores.
Odd and a bit unsettling. You aren’t there yet Frank, but the ‘online fanbase’ gets roasted on Supernatural as well.
Jonah, I’ve got no plans for Sunday at this stage so if you wanted to attempt a Dingo review thingamajig then I’m around.
What female characters are left on Supernatural?
I’m pretty sure Meg 2 is still around, but Ruby 1 and Ruby 2 are gone, Bela is gone, the bar woman and her cute daughter are gone. Did they kill off Dean’s toothy girlfriend yet?
Clearly, it is not safe to have a vagina on this programme. They murdered two women in the pilot!
Deans girlfriend is still alive and that story has pretty much been backburnered. The reaper made another appearance recently. Apart from that…
Listening to the audio commentaries over the seasons, the two things they joked about all through was that killer children (particularly girls) are almost a running gag now, and the short life span of any female character. They say when an actress gets cast in a recurring role in SN they don’t get too excited because they know it’ll be shortlived.
Frank, forigve my confusion here…
Have you watched supernatural before? You have knowledge of all the female characters who have left the show? You found this by looking at cast list, reading IMDB, or you have seen it before?
I wasn’t mentioning very many details because I was under impression you hadn’t seen it before.
My fave bit involving female cast members is that both Ginger Snaps girls have been on the show now. K Isabelle in season 2 and E Perkins in season 4/5 (just 5?)
I’m fully up to date with Supernatural, but over the past month or so I’ve been re-watching it from the start. It holds up really well, too. I recommend binging on Supernatural to everyone.
My favourite thing involving female cast members is spotting various actresses off Buffy. Amy Acker, Julie Benz, Amber Benson. They even had an episode where Mercedes McNab (Harmony off Buffy and Angel) played a vampire, which was almost like seeing the worlds of Buffy and Supernatural crossover with each other.
I’ll do all of Supernatural once the rest of you have watched The Rocket.
Oh yea, Acker was the gal with the kid next to the lake…Benson was the reluctant vamp…Benz was–hmm–was Benz in the ep about the revivalist who had trapped a reaper? And McNab was a vamp who got toasted right near the beginning, I think.
Too bad we couldn’t have Charisma as Jensen’s returning squeeze.
In other news, The Rite is actually a decent movie.
Also, I suggest an Emma Caufield Supernatural cameo.
Somewhere in the midst of all those itty bitty titties you have been gazing at, you need to check out Timer.
Droid, I might be able to pull that off for Sunday. As far as Dingos, what movie you want to do?
I’ve recently seen The Reef, Samson and Delilah, Tomorrow When the War Began. I’d also be up for doing Lake Mungo if you like. Or The Castle as you just watched it.
so. quick update.
home cause of snow again. Up to Mulholland Drive on the Lynchathon. Wow, Lost Highway kind of sucks doesn’t it?
Straight Story is even more impressive seen in the context of his other work.
The bad news is I only have the following left:
Hotel Story
On the Air
and……..
Inland Empire
Maybe I can postpone this by hitting up his short films first.
I will say this Jarv. So far, it’s been easier than I expected. None of the films–Eraserhead included– are worthless and there are great scenes at least in all of them. No true blue abortions.
Lost Highway did start to irritate me a bit though.
I quite like the first half of Lost Highway. It just paints itself into a corner and then Lynch effectively cheats to get out.
Eraserhead, while not worthless, is still a terrible and boring abortion of a film.
I wouldn’t have made it.
Im not through yet….and I should put my Lost Highway comments into perspective.
I saw in 97 at a theater–first Lynch movie outside of Dune and Elephant man– that I had seen. I really liked it then.
By comparison, it’s not really that great. It’s like you say it’s half a good movie and then from there, who the hell knows. Like Frank says, I tihnk most Lynch films E-head included operate off dream logic.
I think LH is the one that effectively has a hole by trying to apply real logic–need for twist/explanation–and I think it might actually bungle even any sense of dream logic.
Strange, because I think you might actually be easier on Lynch than I am. I don’t agrily hate E-head but I didnt think FWWM and LH were successfuld espite having successful parts.
Lynch, once you get into a rhythm isnt hard to endure. However, I’ve still got Inland left to endure.
Writing these things up is gonna be the hard part. Will try my hand at Eraserhead today.
Frankie, Im sure the boobs in MD didnt help at all, huh?
I think MD might be my favorite ‘pure lynch’ movie. EM and SS are not much like his other stuff, but in that wierdo-delusional odd dream universe he occupies I think MD is the most entertaining.
What I hate about MD, and no one will ever admit this BECAUSE ITS LYNCH WHEEWWWW!!! Whatever. Is that the movie was at first a pilot for a new TV show….no one wanted it. SOO Lynch tacked on this fucking nutty ass last half hour which makes minimal sense. So for the first 2 hours it works, then it just spirals into nonsense. And I was thinking that Lynch just made a bunch of shit up to end this pilot episode he had. I liked the first part of it, but then hated like the last half hour.
THAT’s my remebering of the film back from like 2001. I’d need to watch it again to see if I still feel the same way about it.
Koutch… it was a pilot and then it was reworked. The problem is that no one could tell. Tacking on an ending that makes no sense and doesn’t deliver on the earlier sections is basically what Lynch always does.
MD in particular is guilty of that, but I think there’s some dream logic supporting it. The first time I saw the miniparents come crawling out of the bag chittering like a malfunctioning RZD2 I was pretty fed-up with it. Im watching it agin today so we will see where it fits in the resume.
Yeah thats what I’m saying that ending is just nothing. BUT Lynch fans will never buy it and give you some round about explination about shit and act like the movie makes TOTAL sense. Trust me I got some boner Lynch buddies, fuckos that like ‘My Son My Son What Have Ye Done’ just because Lynch put his dick in it. It’s just funny.
Also I like how on the Muholland Drive dvd he didn’t put SCENES for the movie because he doesn’t want to ‘cut the movie up’ or some bullshit like that. You know he didn’t want to do that because then dudes would just fast forward to the dyke scene all the time.
Lost Highway never did much for me, mainly because I don’t have a clue the hell is going on in that film. Mulholland Drive is confusing, but it sort of makes sense (or, at least, my tiny brain has made some sort of sense of it), but Lost Highway goes completely over my head.
What I like about The Straight Story is it’s almost Lynch giving the finger to anyone who thinks he can only spew out a bunch of weird crap. It’s just a simple, effective story, kind of moving (especially when it gets to the end) without going over the top, and it doesn’t have a single dancing midget in it.
Yeah Lost Highway is just boring for the most part, thats its biggest problem. Also a wasted use of Perfect Drug.
The strange thing about Itty Bitty Titty Committee is there were no itty bitty titties in it. They all had perfectly normal boobs, even the main character who was supposedly insecure about her chest.
This is, I should point out, not a complaint.
Also, okay, I will watch Timer tonight.
But it better be good, sir, or there will be trouble!
I like Lost Highway. I loathe Mulholland Drive.
It’s funny, but I don’t think any of us like the same combination of Lynch films.
Look at this chat about Lost Highway, me and you like it, Frank and Jonah don’t.
I don’t think Koutch does either.
I need to see The Straight Story.
Yeah me to.
Jonah, maybe The Reef? I saw it available the other day and was planning on acquiring it. May as well do that. You said it was pretty good didn’t you?
ATTENTION ALL UK BLURAY ENTHUSIASTS!!!
THE THIN RED LINE IS RELEASED ON MAY 16 2011.
This has been a public service announcement brought to you by a very impatient bucket of bolts.
FUCK! They are showing Kung Fu Dunk at the art theater tonight but I can’t go because I’m busy.
It’s got Jay Chou (from Green Hornet) I wonder if its any good. I keep forgetting about it at home so I haven’t seen a trailer for it.
They are also showing Tiny Furniture right before Angles and Idiots this weekend. Thats one of those new dick suck movies that William Ferrel and Apatoad have been going on and on about. The last time they did that was The Foot Fist Way, which was….ok, pretty funny. But that movie looks fucking annoying.
I watched TFFW a few months ago because I realised that Danny McBride makes me laugh in pretty much anything. So anyway, I was a bit let down by TFFW. I was expecting hilarity and all I got was mild amusement. I much prefer Eastbound and Down.
Yeah Eastbound seems like a more honed version of that same character. Footfist has its moments.
Julio, will you answer the FUCKING phone!
Awesome the YOU TUBE movie starts streaming today.
There’s a YOUTUBE movie? A sequel to the Facebook movie perhaps?
Hahah naw. Its a Tony and Ridley Scott Present: Directed by the Guy who directed the smash hit The Eagle.
Back in July I think, they asked everyone to post videos of their life, they gave a few general hints as to what sort of videos they are looking for. And they’ve turned it into a movie. Its sounds interesting, and I trust those guys.
Fassbenders in the new Ridley scifi movie. That’s good news!
I like Fassbender. Excellent in Eden Lake and Centurion.
Yeah I like Fassbender too. And I also like that Ridleys doing an original scifi movie, not prequel nonsense. Even though he’s quoted as saying it has “Alien DNA” and Fassbenders playing an android.
Yeah I like Fassbender in Hunger and I am excited to see him play Magneto!!!!….no not really on that last one.
Fassbender is cool, but he’s trying very hard to be the next Christian Bale.
How is he doing that?
Well first off the whole body weight lose thing. He sort of looks like Bale. He acts like bale. He beats up his family members like Bale. He’s desperate to get a superhero gig. He looks like an uglier version of Bale.
Really he’s fucked though, because his hair is no where near as immaculate as Bale’s.
*groan*
He’s determined to make me hate it in advance
Anyone else here seen ‘The Merry Gentlemen’? I really liked that film.
Never heard of it. Who’s in it?
Batman and that chick from Trainspotting/Old Man Country. Batman directed it as well.
Christ, Soderberghs new movie ‘Haywire’ has a great cast.
Antonio Banderas, Michael Douglas, Bill Paxton, Ewan McGregor, Michael Fassbender, Channing Tatum.
I thought Steven was done with films are some shit? Are studio films? I read something about him recently sounding very twatish.
Well wiki says this is an action movie with a budget of 25m. Which sounds like an independently financed movie to me.
You guys got Blue Bloods over there yet? I suspect none of you will like it, but I really enjoy it. I’m American so I’m predisposed to enjoy all things Selleck, I even watched the last season of Las Vegas because of the stache.
But fucking last night (YEAH THEY MOVED IT OFF OF FRIDAYS! SO I HOPE THAT MEANS SEASON 2!) Droid’s best sport fucking cut into the first 20 minutes of the show. The same shit happened last week (only the first 10 though). I don’t know why they have the need to fucking show women’s basketball I guess they have some tournament going now? But like I’ve never seen it on TV before, let alone during primetime.
But anyways I deleated the second half and will watch it online next week when CBS puts it up. This happened to me earlier this week, the last 15 minutes of House got cut because of low dvr space. And I was thinking, jesus how the fuck did people watch TV before the invention of the DVR/TV shows website combo? Its fucking crazy.
Even kids shows you can go on and catch up on missed episodes. Imagine telling your ten your old self that.
Nah, my favourite sport is womens golf. Closely followed by womens tennis. Then it’s an third place tie between womens basketball and womens softball.
I said BEST, not British spelling of favorite.
What do you mean by best sport then?
Like your best sport, the sport you are best at. Like Micheal Jordan’s best sport would be basketball. Mine would be sitting.
Oh, okay. No wonder I didn’t understand what you were on about.
Don’t put yourself down. I hear you’re a dab hand at eating as well, and nearly made the pole in last years Rascal Nascar division.
Actually, I would pay good money to watch a group of chubbies driving in a circle crashing into each other at low speeds.
Out of interest, is there such a thing as “bad money”? I would contend that all money is good.
Suppose so- if you rob an orphan charity or something. That’s pretty bad money.
Whatever money goes into making Dr. Uwe Boll movies seem like it would be bad money.
That’s not bad money. That’s just money that’s hanging out with the wrong crowd.
Fuck a really interesting documentary would be ‘The Making of a Dr. Boll Movie’…well POTENTIALLY. Like start to finish how he comes up with the idea/gets the money/makes it, like just the slap dash way he has about making film could make for interesting stuff. Like is he surronded by ‘yes men’? Does he have people fighting him all the way? The sob stories of why these once semi famous actors are reduced to starring in his films? The tear jerker ending where the movie opens at number 15, and Boll just plows ahead on his next film. It COULD be interesting, or it could be totally boring because he’s gotten SOO good at making these movies its just like a process now.
Yeah I’d watch Rascal racing. Don’t know if I’d want it to be like normal slow ass rascals or souped up ones. I mean the souped up ones would be funnier, but the slow as ones would make betting and the race that much more intense and tight. If you kept the slow ones you’d have to make the track pretty fucking short though.
No, it’s got to be souped up. I want these fucking things with big ridiculous exhausts and nitros and shit. They’ll need it to counteract the massive drag.
Also, even souped up, the race is still going to be pretty long, so there’s still plenty of time for beer and gambling.
What’s wrong with you two? The best sport is clearly Women’s Beach Vollyball.
I was naming crap sports I would never watch. I enjoy watching womens beach volleyball.
Until someone told you that you’d go blind.
That didn’t stop me. No risk no reward.
You guys see this behind the scenes shot?
http://www.aintitcool.com/node/48236
Chewy’s feet sticking out amuses me.
While chewie sticking out the bottom is quite funny, that whole series is just indicative of how sad that site is now “We’ve got NOTHING so here’s an archive photo for you, aren’t we cutting edge and cool”
I like that series. The only thing AICN has BARELY after that site transition it’s been terrible but they’ve cleaned it up, is that you can still actually see the stories on there. Most other movie sites are SOO fucking littered with pop up ads and shit its just fucking awful trying to go there. Thats why getting movie news off of twitter is nicer.
Like the worst are the websites that feel like they have this sticky layer of glue over them and slogs your whole computer down when you go to them, and if you let your mouse sit for a second over anything some fucking BING pop up ad appears out of nowhere. Just awful awful stuff.
That are movie sites now are more like blogs, which is fine for wolves because we don’t report movie news, but say you got like 10 stories that day, these blog sites usually only have 5-10 on the front page then you have to go back through pages trying to find the story you want. At least AICN has like the past week of news there.
I’M NOT SAYING they are great are anything I’m just saying the state of movie news web sites are pretty much for shit all around.
Okay, I think is Koutchs favourite rum…
hahah what the fuck is that? Purfume or actually alcohol?
It’s aftershave for those very special dates.
Hahah someone just told the girl that was snoring yesterday that she was snoring really loud.
I don’t understand that-
How did nobody not throw things at her yesterday, and why is she not in trouble.
I’d be in deep shit if I did that.
Thats what I’m saying man, the most important aspect of my job is that I clock in and out correctly.
Fucking hell.
Depressing.
Mind you, I’m having a cunt of a week.
This is my favourite rum. Yummy.
Jarv, do they allow you to take a bottle of champs into Lords?
I don’t see why not. It’s a bottle of wine after all, and Lords is full of that type of person.
I know Droid, it really was a damn shame about McNair.
I liked him, he played through injury and pain.
It’s true, it does help that Mulholland Drive has gratuitous boob and lebianry. If only more films understood the importance of those things.
Mulholland Drive isn’t the easiest film to defend without coming off like an artsy Lynch apologist, which I don’t think I am, but I will try anyway.
People have said most of that film is meant to be a dream, but to me it’s about a delusion – a kind of fantasy world – that crumbles as the film progresses. First you see Naomi Watts’s life as she imagines it; a world where she’s innocent, full of hopes, has a great relationship with a sexy lesbian, and is a talented actress headed for success. And slowly but surely you see this fantasy world fall apart and the reality of her life – where she’s a failed actress who lives in a crappy apartment and has possibly (it’s been a while since I’ve seen it so I’m not 100% on this part) killed the woman who dumped her – creeps up on her and she shoots herself, the end.
That’s purely my interpretation, though, and I have no idea whether that’s what Lynch intended (to be honest, I don’t really care what he intended since he doesn’t have any interest in explaining himself). And it’s worth noting I’ve conveniently overlooked certain other aspects of the film (like what the hell does that scene where Mark Pellegrino keeps accidentally shooting people have to do with anything?) to make my interpretation work. It’s the kind of film where other interpretations are just as valid, and it’s also the kind of film where I don’t blame anyone who dismisses it as a bunch weirdo garbage.
It works for me, though. I enjoy that film, although ‘enjoy’ might not be the right word because it would easily go in my top ten list of most depressing films of all time.
See, that’s the one part I disagree with Koutch on a little. Someone claiming that theres a story there beyond singularly the literal on the screen isn’t wrong. I just think it isnt buried that deep. What you just descibed is also my understanding of the ‘plot’ such as it were.
She’s constructed a delusional world for herself and the film is it crumbling around here. I dont recall about the murder butits quite possible. Ill let you know when I rewatch it.
Those other odd plot bits are the indulgent bits Lynch adds in, and those characters like the dwarf and the creature behind the restaurant serve about the same purpose that the gods did in greek tragedy. Somewhere around Twin Peaks Lynch got hung up on those metaphyiscal/otherworldly beings and they show up in almost everything.
Did I say they were wrong?
I just meant they are fucking annoying. I just take Lynch films at face value, fuck that asshole if he doesn’t wanna explain himself. Because he fucking can’t.
Bartleby – I’ll be interested to hear your thoughts after you’ve watched it again. Actually, I wouldn’t mind watching it again myself now. Trouble is, I have already committed to seeing Timer, which is a film some bastard keeps insisting I watch. 😉
no, I wasnt singling you out exactly, but I know your douchebag friends have made you bitter over a couple different directors; Lynch being one of them.
Unlike Richard Kelly, who seemingly can’t tell a story in a cohesive manner, Lynch is actually skilled and talented and can easily make films that explain and provide reasonable solutions.
He did with Blue Velvet. He did it with Twin Peaks. As someone said above, Straight Story was like a slap in the face to those who thought he ‘f’in can’t’.
I do believe though that films aren’t necessarily required to ‘explain themselves’. Once Mulholland Drive establishes itself as a dream of sorts, can it be expected to explain itself?
If it works in its way–and the majority of Lynch’s films actually do–then it comes down to whether we personally like how it’s been done.
Yeah its funny I used to really dig Lynch before them. Well actually I think it was Inland Empire that did it for me with Lynch. I like him, I’ll still MAYBE check out his shit. But still if Lynch wants to be a man rather then just the character he’s created he’ll write a bio explaining his shit and thought process. Not give me some story about how well this one guy can drive because he uses both feet.
Yea, Im not looking forward to Inland Empire. I saw it once and hated it. Almost walked out of the theater and fell asleep finally after my brain could withstand no more. It’s like pure masturbation on the part of Lynch.
Im wondering how I will feel about having endured all the rest. Probably hate it more unless my brain has become unhinged and I join the Lynch Mob.
Koutch, you ever see Industrial Symphony? It’s Lynch doing some wierd stage-show thing that showcases the songs of the female singer from Twin Peaks. It actually works because it has no pretensions to a narrative. Just oddness for it’s own sake and in the proper venue.
The thing I hate most about Inland is that its fucking boring. At least the weirdness of his films can keep you interested but Inland feels like a fucking college film, or actor’s rehearsing for a Lynch film. Also it looks like shit.
Have you ever heard the argument about what a great visual eye Lynch has? How people think he’s one of the best. He’s fine, he’s got a decent eye, but I’ve never thought any of his films looked amazing. I wonder who DP’s his films, or if he does it himself. TO IMDB!
Hahah no wonder Loaded Weapon 1 looks so good, from the Cinematographer behind Evil Dead 2/Lost Highway/Muholland Dr/The Spy Who Shagged Me/Scream 2-4/Love Guru!
Yeah the one film Lynch if cited as being the Cinematographer for is Inland Empire. Movie’s garbaje.
I will say this about Lynch, he is sort of a career maker. A bunch of fucks got their start with him. That’s probably because he’s a good guy probably recomends people. He’s always seemed like a nice guy. Probably why straight story is one of his best films (so says ye).
Anyone here ever see Thief of Bagdad? Great little movie. Beats the heck out of Disney’s Aladdin. And obviously wipes the floor with Prince of Persia.
BOMBS OVER BAGHDAD!
Don’t Pull the thang out, unless you plan to bang!
Such a fucking liar Echo, because as we all know, this is an impossibility.
Snow day today..
Just finished shoveling, took me 3.5 hours. Yet another 1 1/2 foot of snow.
Fuck.
shoveled this morning. Thankfully we didnt get quite that much, but it was just shy of a foot. Had to help dig out a few neighbors too. Not great fun by any stretch.
Well, if you will insist on living in the antarctic, you have no one to blame but yourself.
A word of warning – Don’t let any Norwegian dogs into your home and if you see something interesting buried in the ice FOR GOD’S SAKE DON’T DIG IT UP!
Does that mean I shouldn’t have put an electric blanket on it since I brought it inside my basement?
Fucking hell. They can take this job and shovel it. There’s no way I’m staying past 6 tonight.
This upcoming Snow White film in which Kristen Stewart plays Snow White, will Kristen Stewart be showing boob?
I only ask because I’d like to see her boob.
She played a stipper in a movie with the masterbating guy from 8MM.
Would you be satisfied if it was the same boob as the one in the next Twilight movie? Or do you demand to see the other one.
Boob is boob. No is buildings. Is tomatoes, huh? Is boob, is dancing, is music, is potatoes. So, boob is boob. Okay?
You think tomatoes are boobs? I’d hate to see you in the fruit and veg section.
The robot is right. If she’s getting one out in twilight then it is only fair that she unleashes the other one in snow white
It would also set a pretty good challenge to nerds everywhere to try to photoshop the two together.
P.S. I don’t know why it occurred to me to take a quote from an awesome film and replace one word with the word ‘boob’, but it did so I did it.
P.P.S. One million internets to whoever knows which awesome film it’s from WITHOUT CHEATING.
Did anyone get my “take this job and shovel it” quote? I thought that was pretty easy.
ehhh i recognized the quote but can’t place the movie without cheating.
She won the oscar last year.
FUCK!!! THAT DOESN’T HELP EITHER! LAST YEARS OSCAR = most forgettable in fucking history.
Demolition MAN! Whew! Ok. And I managed to figure out it was her without looking it up. I knew it was some movie were people or someone said shit just slightly fucked up. I was thinking more fish out of water alien story, like What Planet Are You From.
HUZZAH!
Think of the most undeserving oscar winner since… well, Crash. And she was in that too!
Steady on.
There’s many an undeserving Oscar. Our Nic has one, Julia Roberts has one
Fuck, even Sean Connery has one
Well I said “since”.
Wasn’t million dollar baby after it.
Whatever you think about MDB, it’s a much better and more deserving film than Crash. Crash is shit. And I think Koutch has a great opinion of Crash. This won’t happen many times Koutch, but remind me what you said about Crash. And I’m not talking about the one where you think Spaders not trying to fuck an open wound.
What that Crash assumes that everyone is racist?
Yes, but last time you said it I laughed. Which means it was funny.
This is funny.
Hey jarv, how much does your average bottle of champs cost? Cause I just looked this one up on the interweb and it goes for around £35.
Roughly £30 Ish depending
Franklin T Marmoset, you are hereby requested to view and comment on this film.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1679235/
You have no idea how conflicted I’ve been over that film.
When I saw it had become available for acquirement, I just sat there for about ten minutes, mouse pointer hovering back and forth, trying to decide whether it was a good idea or not. On the one hand, it’s Mean Girls, and I like Mean Girls very much. It’s also a DTV sequel, and I can’t resist a DTV sequel. But on the other hand, I’m pretty confident watching it will be like pouring a bucket of pink-coloured poop all over myself.
Do I really want or need to have that experience?
Yes. You really do.
I’ve been thinking about doing a Mean Girls/Easy A double feature, but what I could do instead is make it a triple feature of Mean Girls/Mean Girls 2/Easy A. That way, it’s a shit film surrounded by two good films, which might lessen the impact.
Trouble is, that would have to wait until the weekend, which means convincing special lady friend to watch them with me. And I’m not sure convincing her to watch a triple feature of films about teenage girls is such a good idea.
I watched both films over christmas. Not a double bill, but in the same week. They make a good double bill. I can recommend that at the very least. Although I’d prefer you completed the trifecta. If anyone can do it you can.
Once you’ve downgraded your manhood with a Mean Girls 2 shit sandwhich there is only one way to power back up….The Rocket.
It is a terrible idea. Opening up a world of hurt for yourself
Mean Girls 2 is stting on the stack here. Maybe I’ll tackle it tonight. DId a ton of writing today. Did Rite and Mechanic reviews, Ip Man 2, Eraserhead, Outcast, Thief of Bagdad, Gargoyles, Timer and Vanishing on Seventh St.
Will put some up tonight and some up tomorrow. Finsihing up the Top 20 SyFy Originals right now.
You wrote all those today? Damn. Thats a hell of an effort.
Hey, I just finished Timer. Actually not half bad. It didn’t annoy me at all, which films about women looking for love usually do. And Emma Caulfield was good, it was nice to see her in a decent part.
Interestingly (depending on your point of view, I suppose) Timer co-starred Kali Rocha, who played Halfrek on Buffy, meaning Timer features not one but two former vengeance demons. Kneel in awe of my nerdliness!
How was The Rite? I’ve heard it was boring, but boring Hopkins is usually good for me. I could watch that dude read the phone book.
I’ve even got time to watch something else, so I think I’ll go with Welcome To The Rileys, in which Kristen Stewart plays a filthy whore and may potentially be showing boob.
I only mention this because I’d like to see her boob.
At least you’re moderating your expectations. A more adventurous man might hope for boobs, and end end up twice as disappointed.
So no ones checking out Stipper Bella with Masterbating 8MM guy movie?? Also with the most Oscar Nominated Actress of recent outside of Meryl Streep.
I think you see a wee bit of bum bum. Granted it takes a man to handle a stripper, so Franks not there in his life yet, he can wait for true teen love to finally blossom.
So Franks checking out Stipper Bella with Masterbating 8MM guy movie?? Also with the most Oscar Nominated Actress of recent outside of Meryl Streep.
i know I’m going to regret this but… Who’s “masturbating 8MM guy” and why do you remember him?
Eh its the fuck from The Mexican and the Sopranos. I just call him that because I never spell his name right nor Sopranos. Well I was going to put the proper spelling of sopranos here, but I guess I did fucking spell it right.
I read an interview a while back in EW for ‘The Mexican’ and they asked the three stars what they were most embarressed about in their movie career. Can’t remember what Pitt and Roberts said, but Gandof fucking says “eh…I wish I hadn’t done 8MM because theres a scene with me masterbating in it which I regret” I think he also said that the movie sucked. And I’ve always found that funny.
Gandolfini was in that movie? Fucking hell. I loathe that movie and have forgotten pretty much everything. It’s stricken from the record.
Yeah I know I think most people had, thats probably why I thought it was funny for Gandof to bring it up. I don’t think anyone had been calling him out on it.
I think everyone regrets that movie.
Eh its the fuck from The Mexican and the Sopranos. I just call him that because I never spell his name right nor Sopranos. Well I was going to put the proper spelling of sopranos here, but I guess I did fucking spell it right.
I read an interview a while back in EW for ‘The Mexican’ and they asked the three stars what they were most embarressed about in their movie career. Can’t remember what Pitt and Roberts said, but Gandof fucking says “eh…I wish I hadn’t done 8MM because theres a scene with me masterbating in it which I regret”. And I’ve always found that funny.
Fringe update.
It has got a lot better.
Porcupine Man episode was ok. Videodrome episode wasn’t. However slaphead kid was and the fact that slaphead kids are grown underground and then become evil slaphead adults was a storming idea
Anna Torv needs to lay off the Botox. Her head weirds me out
You need to stop concentrating on Torvs forehead. Have you got to the killer cold bug yet? I really liked that episode.
That one was quite good. What with Walter injecting catterpiller’s with LSD.
We’re on Disc 3 at the moment, I think. It is noticably better though at the minute.
A little shout out to the gentleman and scholar Spud. I just watched DREAM A LITTLE DREAM (all caps of course). I loved it. Great performances for Robards and the two coreys, particularly Feldman. A sweet, funny and quite emotionally involving film. It’s greatest asset was that it took teenagers seriously, instead of trivialising their problems like so many teen films do. Reminded me of the best John Hughes films. Thanks for recommending the movie to me, mate.
Aw, cheers, Droid. Glad to spread the love for such a little-known but exceptional movie.
“Why do we have to take something so far that it can’ be taken back? I’ll tell you why. Because we’re young. And when you’re young, every little thing seems so big!”
I love Feldman’s speech as Coleman in that tense scene where Joel loses it towards the end of the movie – like you say, very reminiscent of John Hughes. And it does feature FUTURE’S SO BRIGHT, I GOTTA WEAR SHADES by Timbuk 3, and that alone would have got me watching this movie. LOVE that song. It also opens the movie KUFFS, which like DALD is a mojorluy under-appreciated movie – especially if, like me, you spent most of the early 90s wishing you were Christian Slater. He was so fucking COOL…
Glad you liked it, Droid. Now you have the screwball greatness that is LICENCE TO DRIVE to come too! Mmmm… Teen Heather Graham…
Yeah, I really liked that speech by Feldman. Felt right on the money. A lot of truth to it and he sold it well. Really good performance from him. And I also really liked the soundtrack. Lots of great songs on there. Some early REM, which is always good. I love Kuffs. That was the instigation for my Slaterthon which I had early on in my AICN career. Included the likes of Heathers and Pump up the Volume. Love early Slater. Kuffs is also responsible for my unreasonable forgiveness of Tony Goldwyn. For some reason I really like the guy.
I just completed the Two Coreys Double Bill with Licence to Drive. I wasn’t as enamoured with LTD as you. It was an enjoyable little film, but very middle of the road 80’s teen movie. A few good laughs but nothing too memorable. Great to see Richard Masur though. I really like that actor. Great in Deadly Pursuit (the crappier title Shoot to Kill for the yanks) with Tom Berenger, Sidney Poitier and Kirstie Alley. A childhood fav of mine. It also features the great Clancy Brown. Great flick.
Cheers Spud.
I just got Mrs Spud-To-Be to watch KUFFS all the way through for the first time on TCM a couple of weeks back. She couldn’t believe how funny it was, thought the tied-up-near-a-bomb sequence was brilliant (mainly because on VHS the scumbags forgot to add the subtitles, but on the TCM version they showed them!) and thoroughly enjoyed the movie. She had real trouble believing that the girl was Milla Jovovich in a VERY early role, though.
KUFFS is one of my favourite movies of the 90s. Add HEATHERS and PUMP UP THE VOLUME, and you have a definitive Christian Slaterthon, as you say. Great, great movies 😀
Heathers is a great film.
I like Kuffs and Pump up the Volume, but they aren’t on the same level:
“I love you my dead gay son!”
“You believed it because you wanted to believe it. Your true feelings were too gross and icky for you to face.”
It’ll be a long time until Hollywood gets the balls to make a movie like HEATHERS again. Absolutely great movie.
KUFFS is squarely aimed at the Slater fans, and PUMP UP THE VOLUME has an almost embarrassing level of “You’re not the boss of me!” teen angst rebellion, but if you bear in mind the movie is aimed from the perspective of a teenager, all the over-the-top antics suddenly make sense. It’s completely ridiculous, but totally worth it for those great monologues Slater does so well.
Allan Moyle then went on to make EMPIRE RECORDS after PUMP UP THE VOLUME, thereby proving he can only make movies aimed at teens, from a teen perspective, despite being a bloke in his 50s. Great movies, though…
Not really a fan of Empire Records. It’s all a bit crap if you ask me. And you didn’t.
Spud if you liked Heathers you way wanna check out the sex comedy, Sex and Death 101. Its written by the same guy and I think he directed it. Its pretty funny. Has Winonna and the bloke from the Mentalist in it.