Burt Gummer’s Rec Room – January and February 2013 Archive

A gathering place for paranoid survivalists and those who worship at the Church of Chang 

January 2013, Looks like the Mayans were wrong. Damned if I’m decommissioning my arsenal though.

Disclaimer: This is the part of the Church that is the most no holds barred. None of it is intended with malice, and although it can on occasion seem a little bit fraught, it is banter rather than venom. So, be warned that this is like taking a naked swim in a piranha tank and not recommended for the faint of heart.

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1,211 responses to “Burt Gummer’s Rec Room – January and February 2013 Archive”

  1. tombando says :

    Amadeus puts me to sleep. Each to their own, ya know? I can sit thru 3 hours of most David Lean stuff so it’s what you like. Gandhi was a Snoozer.

    • Echo the Bunnyman says :

      Bando, I too like Amadeus but I know exactly what you mean, and the kind of ‘important’ epic you are talking about from the 80s. Ironically, one of the films that represents this period well is IS a David Lean film, his last, A Passage to India. That one has about the same feel as most of the movies you mentioned. Lean films from a previous era are, however,more engrossing.

      • Continentalop says :

        I think the 80s is the era when Oscar bait really started to develop (Gandhi, Amadeus, Chariots of Fire, Out of Africa, Driving Miss Daisy, etc.).

      • koutchboom says :

        Hehehe and in some manner Cloud Atlas tried to transcend it (even though its following the Crash formula a little) and was shut down. I wonder if Cloud had been a hit if it would’ve gotten further in the Oscar race.

      • Judge Droid says :

        I haven’t seen Atlas yet, but it’s not a simple, straightforward, back slapping, self-congratulatory crowd pleaser. So it never stood a chance.

      • koutchboom says :

        I bet if it hadn’t been a flop it would’ve had a decent Oscar run. It’s almost as Oscar baity as Life Of Pi, if you find that movie Oscar bait. They are both about the celebration of life and ones self and how human nature and emotion is not confined to any sort of religion or time.

        It’s just like if Bond had not been a massive hit it wouldn’t have gotten any Oscar noms.

      • koutchboom says :

        And it follows the basic Crash story line structure/formula, something I guess initially came in vogue with Pulp Fiction…..which I guess can be sort of traced back to Rushomon? Idk whatever movie QT stole that style from and made it popular again reaching its apex with Crash.

      • Continentalop says :

        I always saw Pulp Fiction as just a variant of anthology movies, especially ones like Dead of Night, where all the characters interact at one point or another.

        I guess the Killing was another inspiration.

      • koutchboom says :

        Yeah I can see that. I knew there was a better answer than Rushomon.

      • Echo the Bunnyman says :

        Agree with Koutch. Pi does have Oscar bait DNA but is somewhat different. Beasts is fairy bizarre for a Best pic nom, but in its indie way it’s a success story too. I think CA would have been nominated if it hadnt been sort of commercially and critically dismissed. It would have been one of those ‘its the nomination that is the prize’ sort of noms likely, but I think it could have.

        It’s not Rshomon really–thats the multiple viewpoints of the same story routine. The DNA is most recently from Altman? The slice of life, interlocking story format. It was most commonly a device of playwrights.

        I think Cloud Atlas stands a chance of being a Dark City like film where it gathers itself after a few years and becomes a cult hit.

      • Judge Droid says :

        Dark City is appreciated by most who see it. Problem is, no fuckers seen it. Outside of nerds and cinephiles.

      • koutchboom says :

        I saw Dark City in a filled to capacity theater.

      • Judge Droid says :

        I saw DC in a theatre with me, my mate, his girlfriend, and about two other people. That was opening weekend.

  2. tombando says :

    I like Dark City, own it.

    Gandhi had a terrific central performance, then it was spot the name british lion of stage time: John Mills, Geilgud, Trevor Howard, etc.

    • Judge Droid says :

      Yep. I mean the general public when I say no fuckers seen it.

    • Continentalop says :

      I like Gandhi too but I also think a lot of other films that year should have won best picture.

      • Toadkillerdog says :

        Who Killed Roger Rabbit is on TCM.
        I love that flick! I have seen it countless times, my girls are a bit over it by now, but i dont care and Joanna cassidy rocks almost as hard as j.rabbit!
        speaking of rockin hard, dame Shirley killed Goldfinger at 76! I was a bit worried for her, but she belted it out and that is a truly accurate word she hit that last note with all she was worth

      • koutchboom says :

        Was it!!!! Fawk! I’ve been dying to see that movie again for some time and TCM HD is really fucking nice.

      • koutchboom says :

        Hehehe yeah her performance then Buffetfall gets an Oscar? Hehehehehe I wonder how many people tried to change their vote last second.

      • Judge Droid says :

        Roger Rabbit is a 4 chang movie. Just brilliant on a number of levels.

  3. Continentalop says :

    I must find this movie.

    This fight scene is even more awesome than Undefeatable.

  4. Just Pillow Talk says :

    So I caught Stallone’s Dredd last night. Knowing nothing about Dredd…it is a very meh movie. There is nothing any good in that movie…except Diane.

    • Toadkillerdog says :

      Demolition Man was on AMC, I rarely to watch AMC because of commercials, however i did watch up until first break as Wesley kicked the crap out of the cops

      • Judge Droid says :

        DM is quite enjoyable. Very silly, but it’s fairly good humoured. You can take this job and shovel it.

      • Toadkillerdog says :

        Yes, it is a guilty pleasure and sandy was lovely and Wesley kicked ass

      • Judge Droid says :

        Mellow greetings TKD. What seems to be your boggle?

        (It’s got quite an amusing script)

      • Toadkillerdog says :

        Hola R2, yeah I do like it and the funny thing was that the part i watched last night on amc had the some kind of sub title info, explaining how this was sandys first major movie, how the director used names from sci fi and other genres for the characters, one of them was named alfredo garcia!

      • koutchboom says :

        Daniel Waters baby one of the best. And brother to the director of Mean Girls and Spiderwick. Also Demo Man was directed by some Matthew Barney type visual artist weirdo.

      • Echo the Bunnyman says :

        Demolition Man=Sly’s Judge Dredd but with humor and entertainment value. DM is quite fun for what it is. Pity that someone out there thought it was a good idea to upgrade Schneider’s cameo to a co-star role for the next go-round.

    • koutchboom says :

      Eat recycled food, its good for the planet and OK for you.

  5. tombando says :

    Roger Rabbit is fun. I still wish they’d have made a couple Zemeckis followups to it, good stuff! How Bob Hoskins avoided being nominated for that–

  6. Echo the Bunnyman says :

    well, the John Carter ‘bad marketing’ of the year award goes to the Jack the Giant Slayer campaign. Just saw the movie. Useless 3D (bit of an oxymoron), and too much cgi, but nowhere the train wreck the trailers made it out to be. In fact, it’s kind of a fun matinee movie that’s more straight forward fairy tale adventure like an old Harryhausen movie. In fact, it’s more Harryhausen than either of the two Titans movies. McGregor is fun in it, and Hoult and the girl are ok, and Tucci is chewing the scenery viciously

    At best it’s just OK, but I liked it better than any of Singer’s X-Men movies and Superman Stalks.

    Recommendation wise, I think it’s probably right up Bando’s alley, and Toad and the kids will get a kick out of it. Koutch might like it too.

    Again, not something to rave about, but not as horrendous as the marketing let on.

    • koutchboom says :

      But they delayed it to give it better marketing!!!!

      • Echo the Bunnyman says :

        I know…and if you are gonna take your generic CGI trinket movie and move it off the summer, why put it one week in front of the other big generic CGI trinket movie?

        I have serious doubts Oz will be good, but I dont have any doubts it will be big.

    • Toadkillerdog says :

      Thanks for the review,
      the girls want to see this movie more than they do Oz, which is strange to me,
      I just watched Juan of the Dead. It was good. Nice seeing a slice of Cuban life – even in a zombie comedy, from the point of view of a Cuban. Well made flick too

      • Echo the Bunnyman says :

        well the good news Toad, is that it isn’t going to be a painful sit for you.

        Juan of the Dead was amusing to me. I think Im done with zombies though. I cant think of a single interesting thing to do with them now.

  7. Continentalop says :

    Started watching Green Lantern. Gave up 10 minutes in.

    I’ll try again tomorrow. Maybe.

  8. Just Pillow Talk says :

    Got cozy with Liam last night and watched Taken 2.

    While I didn’t think it was a bad movie, it certainly didn’t match up to the first. Action wise it was vastly inferior and it took me off guard when the movie was winding down and I felt a bit cheated in the action department.

    What I think this movie did better was the initial setup of normalcy in their lives. Maybe because we had the advantage of the first under our belts…

  9. Jarv says :

    Fuckssakes.

    Cloud Atlas is out, and I didn’t even know until today.

    Shitty fucking Marketing.

    Agree with K about GL. Skip all the daddy issues/ slightly gayer Top Gun stuff from the first 40 minutes and I bet the rest of GL is OK.

    Also agree with Droid. It’s nowhere near as bad as ASM

    Disagree about John Carter. It’s a bad film with bad marketing.

    • Judge Droid says :

      Yeah I’m trying to see Atlas and Die Hard this week. On at shitty times though (ie. not straight after work).

      • Echo the Bunnyman says :

        see CA before Die Hard. Personally, I wouldn’t waste theater cash on DH5–the action scenes are so erratic and haphazard I imagine the big screen only amplifies their faults, but even if you hate Cloud Atlas (and I suppose you might) it’s worth seeing in a theater.

      • Judge Droid says :

        I have an unlimited card (which I’m frequently too lazy to use to its full potential), so I don’t need to worry about wasting cash on it. It’s more the fact that I currently struggle to get to the cinema more than once per week (if I’m lucky) so I’ve got to pick and choose what to see.

    • Echo the Bunnyman says :

      No, we agree it had bad marketing.

      As for GL, it may improve after the first twenty minutes, but it doesn’t become a good movie. Like I said, I dont hate it–it’s meh at best–but for anyone who read the GL comics (that’s not me, but I thought COnti did)it’s got to be frustrating. GL was fun in spots, but it feels like a tease. Every time it flirts with something interesting, it becomes earthbound again. I mean, daddy issues need to go, sure, but its not like after the intro he jets off to Oa and the whole film becomes some big crazy adventure. Which, realistically, is exactly what should have happened.

      • Judge Droid says :

        GL is okay. I think Jarv watched the extended edition, because he saw it on dvd. Because of that, he caught the full brunt of the shithouse opening daddy issues scenes. The theatrical cut didn’t have that. I’ve seen both versions, and it is still fairly enjoyable after the early scenes. The problems with it are all story, and a couple of key casting choices. The movie doesn’t really flow, and the big fart cloud was definitely the wrong choice for the bad guy in the opening movie. It probably needed to scale back somewhat. Have a bad guy who’s at least a humanoid, who can hold a conversation and has a straightforward purpose for being evil. That was the biggest problem with it. That and Ryan Reynolds working overtime trying to romance a plank of wood.

      • Jarv says :

        I did indeed. And hence why I think it was arrant toss. Although I also agree about the giant fart cloud.

  10. Jarv says :

    The wife has started Battlestar Galactica.

    MEH MEH MEH MEH MEH MEH MEH.

    Does it get better? Because it’s a bit boring so far. Also, Hansel and Gretal is apparently out as well.

    • Continentalop says :

      I’m on season 2, so I can tell you it gets better.

      It does not, however, get as good as it should have.

    • Echo the Bunnyman says :

      BSG does get better, but I never thought it was worth all the accolades it got. A bit too dreary to have much fun with, and too conceptually daffy to really take too seriously.

      Skip Hansel and Gretel. It’s junk. A few decent moments–very very few–but overall it’s Brothers Grimm all over again.

      • Jarv says :

        That’s good to know. Because after three series of Sons of Anarchy, I’m not sure I can take 4 of this if it keeps up in this vein.

        It is fucking dreary. I (vaguely) remember the 70’s one being much more fun, and Starbuck not being a cunt.

      • Continentalop says :

        The problem with Starbuck is she suffers from Batman/Wolverine syndrome. They throw in everything including the kitchen sink with her.

        She’s the best pilot, best sniper, toughest hand-to-hand fighter, best card player, biggest stud, smartest strategist (but no officer material because she’s such a loner/strategist), is able to think outside the box, is a good artist, could have been a pro “triangle” player and can still hold her own against a star player, and is the toughest and a wise ass…

        all while also being the one with the most baggage and troubled history and reasons to have Wagnerian rage and anger.

        Chief, Boomer and Col. Tigh are way more interesting characters.

      • Continentalop says :

        Col. Tigh-Fighter being even more interesting than any of them.

      • Echo the Bunnyman says :

        It unfortunately starts to unravel as it moves closer to the last season. And the ‘guess the Cylon’ crap gets old fast.

      • koutchboom says :

        I tried to watch an episode of BSG and I couldn’t get past the use of the word frak it was just too lame and took me out of any interest I may have had in it.

      • Echo the Bunnyman says :

        It sort of sounds petty when stated like that, but at some level that IS a large part of what’s wrong with the show; its need to constantly be perceived as ‘cool’ to a geek audience.

        Stuff like that is constantly distracting from investment in the story.

      • Jarv says :

        Got to agree. It’s every other word out of Starbuck’s trap.

      • Jarv says :

        Also- I’m already bored with spot the cylon.

      • Echo the Bunnyman says :

        that aspect gets much worse as it goes along. and the ending, I suspect, will right piss you off. In fact, knowing your tastes you may want to bin it now unless you have real curiosity for it or the missus is hooked. You’d be better just picking Fringe back up and finishing it.

      • Jarv says :

        It’s chariots of the gods rubbish. Clearly.

        Fucking nerds. Can they ever rave about something actually good?

      • Toadkillerdog says :

        Hola Jarvik!
        Yeah BSG just did not work for me, i tried. Did not hate it, but i truly do not think the writers knew what direction to take and were winging it.
        Starbuck never worked for me either. What Conti said about the character nails it

      • Jarv says :

        Hola TKD.

        Missus is hooked. Damn it

  11. tombando says :

    Okay watching some Tcm stuff..

    *Dodsworth ’36 w Walter Huston and Mary Astor. Decent if stiff midlife crisis soaper. Has its moments.

    *Wuthering Heights-’39. Olivier, oberun, David Niven! Another soaper, Victorian era love triangle out in the Moors. Name cast best part.

    *The Westerner-’40. Gary Cooper, Walter Brennan, Paul Hurst. Judge Roy Bean, rangewar, Chill Wills. Walter as Bean is great.

    • Continentalop says :

      The Westerner is an awesome movie. You ever see The Life and Times of Judge Roy Bean?

    • Toadkillerdog says :

      I loved Dodsworth. For its time it was a daring flick and still holds up extermely well today.
      Wuthering heights the flick is damn good, but does not hold a candle to the book.
      The Westerner is great

  12. tombando says :

    One more:

    Ball of Fire-’41, Stanwyck, Dana Andrews, Cooper, SZ Szakall, Clarence the Angel, etc. Sillyness involving the mob, their burlesque queen Moll, 7 dwarfish profs and ‘research’. Cast is great fun.

    • Echo the Bunnyman says :

      Bando, I think you are the person on here watching the most consistently interesting stuff. Well, you and There with his golden trashy scifi.

      I need to start watching older stuff again.

      • tombando says :

        Well thank you Jonah Bart, all it consists of is turning on TCM and watching a few oldies I haven’t seen before or in a long time. I do like what they put on. I hadn’t even heard of ‘Ball of Fire’ or knew that David Niven was in ‘Wuthering Heights’. Good stuff.

      • tombando says :

        Well thank you Jonah Bart, all it consists of is turning on TCM and watching a few oldies I haven’t seen before or in a long time. I do like what they put on. I hadn’t even heard of ‘Ball of Fire’ or knew that David Niven was in ‘Wuthering Heights’. Good stuff.

  13. tombando says :

    Dodsworth WAS quite daring, yes, it left me a bit flat but it was not lacking in any way. I always like Walter Huston.

    The Westerner is great. I always like spotting familiar faces ala a young Forrest Tucker–‘hey, that guy I know-he went onto being famous later on, now who is he-?!–and Paul Hurst. Look for the chunky guy w/ Pat Buchanon’s face. Hard to miss.

    They also ran the Jungle Book w/ Sabu, John Qualen and Joseph Calleia. Some good stuff there too-the work w/ animals, F/X, etc. pretty great considering it was ’42 when that was made.

    Ball of Fire has this great cast of Very well used older character guys in it-Szakall, Oscar Homolka, ‘Clarence’, Leonid Kinskey, etc. It’s pretty fun to see them all trying to out-mug each other, they serve as the 7 Dwarves around fellow nebbish prof. Gary Cooper(!), some good stuff there. Dan Duryea makes his usual Snidely Whiplash gunman app. and you get a quick cameo of Elisha Cook Jr. as a waiter. Pretty good.

    Wuthering Heights was fine, but I wasn’t finding myself drawn into it that far. I liked Niven, Oberon, Olivier, etc.

  14. tombando says :

    I never bothered much w/ the new Battlestar, the old one was just okay and doesn’t hold up well, the new one had a *MEH* air about it.

  15. Continentalop says :

    Ok. It’s official.

    Green Lantern is worse than ASM.

    • koutchboom says :

      I felt that way when I first saw GL. But having reseen it missing that first 20 it has such an oddness about it, that I think if I ever rewatch Ass2Mouth again that movie will have this lame stale cornyness to it.

      • Continentalop says :

        I think GL is the bigger travesty.

        But I will say GL and ASM almost follow the exact same formula. It’s like they got the same template.

      • koutchboom says :

        Ohhhh shit yeah Conti forgot to mention the new Green Lantern: The Animated Series. It’s pretty awesome. Seems all you have to do to make a DC cartoon good is put The Animated Series after it. It’s probably the best cartoon on right now. It totally makes up for the movie (and note it has absolutely nothing to do with the movie. )

        The animation style does take an episode or two to get used to, but I’ve grown to really like it now.

      • koutchboom says :

        They just did a Larfleeze episode it was cool, but a little Gollum esque.

  16. Xiphos0311 says :

    Mega post to cover a variety of topics:

    1. Skyfall: what a waste. Started off reasonably well, a nice chase through Istanbul then over the rooftops of the Grand Bazaar. a totally goofy and gleeful destruction of a moving train then dumb set in. A fight on the roof of the train which has been a seen a million times before but Ok whatever. Then the trouble really start. Moneypenny pulls out an M4 to take a shot over 300 yards at two dudes fighting on a moving train, ummmm no. Then she holds the rifle like she didn’t know which end was the important part or what she was doing with it The of course Bond gets dropped, Then that wailing English cow starts murderized that poor song that never did a thing to her. A bunch of other dopey shit happens. Parental issues galore, a dumb fuck Bond back story with a Scottish Alfred and apparently Bond is mega rich and Scottish Laird. A bad guy that is a slimy mess of every gay cliche there is and no real reason to do what was doing except that he views M as Mum or Mommy or Mom; and he’s equipped with a stupid plan to accomplish his nebulous goals.

    On the plus the Eurasian chick was smoking hot maybe the best looking Bond dame ever. There were some interesting ideas like a broken a Bond that they didn’t really explore and I guess some other things that I can’t remember. All in all sad waste of time.

    BSG: Another feather in the nerd cap of picking MEH things as the best show EVER!!!!!!!! the final season and half were just dire and the finale was LOST level of insulting stupid. Starbuck jesus was she a chore and somehow, like Conti noted, the best at everything. The first few season were decent with a few truly outstanding episodes(33, Water, Exodus Pt. 2 with the low atmosphere jump and the Sacrifice of the Pegasus.) but over all it was just OK with the last season and half sucking harder then politician at a fund raiser.

    There were a couple of other points I wanted to cover but I forget what they were and I’m too lazy to go look them up.

    • Continentalop says :

      Have yet to see Skyfall.

      As for BSG, one thing I really hate about that show, and not to sound like I’m kissing up to you and toad, is how they depict the marines. I mean, in that galaxy the colonial marine corps must be as incompetent as fuck because they need Starbuck or Apollo or fucking whomever to do everything. You’d think a marine (or a soldier who happened to be aboard one of the civilian crafts) would be the best sniper, the best at H2H and/or the best at CQ tactics. Nope. It’s always a pilot.

      The only marines they ever focus on are the dumbfucks who panic and shoot civilians, the traitorous guard of Pres. Rosalin who helps her escape, or Lt. Throne and the guys from Pegasus who try to rape Sharon. Grunts are treated like shit on that show.

      I suspect sailors made BSG.

      • coltighfighter says :

        You are correct. Ron Moore used to be a Navy reserve, and based a lot of the minuate on life on Navy ship.

        I still love BSG warts and all, so I shall decline from commenting on this thread any further lol

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        Actually Moore was on an Naval ROTC scholarship but then failed out of University. He did one summer float on a ship and from that he extrapolated many wrong things on how the Navy and Marine Corps work. So my point is this, he was never really a sailor.

  17. Continentalop says :

    George Lucas’s daughter, Amanda, 5-1 as an MMA fighter.

    No, she’s not a looker. No, she’s not that good. And yes, she is chubby. But damnit, I tip my hat to her. At least she is doing her own thing instead of relying on nepotism and having daddy buy her a production company or help her make her $20 million “independent” feature film.

  18. koutchboom says :

    Well I hope your happy now, brought to you buy Orca and Kurtzman respectfully:

    Len Wiseman:

    http://www.imdb.com/title/tt2345759/combined

    Brad Anderson:
    http://www.imdb.com/title/tt2647544/combined

    Cruise and The Snow White Fuck (this actually could be solid):
    http://www.imdb.com/title/tt2388803/combined

  19. Jarv says :

    I’ve been thinking more and more about Skyfall, and if you take Bardem out of it (mummy issues aside), it’s actually a pretty shitty film.

    Bond is meant to be wealthy upper middle class, so the old house thing isn’t out of the question. Didn’t mind that.

    Just totally underwhelming. Again.

    And Adele is a fat cunt who needs to fuck off forever. Shirley Bassey is still going, so if you want a bond theme that sounds like her, just fucking hire her. Don’t hire the porky impersonator.

    • Just Pillow Talk says :

      I did like Skyfall…because I felt it was a step up from Quantum. But yes, it still felt incomplete as a movie let alone a Bond movie. I agree…it should have been larger in nature.

    • Continentalop says :

      What does here obesity have to do with it? She’s a singer, you hear her , you don’t look at her. I mean Aretha Franklin’s fat and it doesn’t change that she’s got a voice.

      (Although it was a blatant Bassey rip off).

      • Toadkillerdog says :

        I did not think Adele was ripping off Bassey, if so it was a pale imitation. Bassey showed what she could do even at 76! It was amazing and when she hit that last note, dayum!

      • Judge Droid says :

        What does here obesity have to do with it?

        Jarv hates many things. Porkers being just one of them.

      • Continentalop says :

        Jarv doesn’t hate many things. Jarv haves everything.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        being a fat pig is like being a druggie or rummy, it show a lack of character and backbone. its weakness.

      • Continentalop says :

        Yeah it shows weakness, but so what? She was hired for her song and her voice, which is what should be judged for (and if you hate those, ok, legitimate opinion). But she isn’t a model nor a candidate to be a Green Lantern.

      • Continentalop says :

        I guess my point is at least Adele has actual singing chops, which I can respect, unlike the auto-tuned pin up dolls we have playing pop music here in the States.

        Katy Perry, Avril Lavigne, that girl rom Pussy Cat Dolls all might be good looking, but but both their music is vapid and horrendous. At least Adele has some talent, despite looking like a beached whale.

      • Judge Droid says :

        I won’t pretend I know a lot about her, but from the little I do, I think the dislike for Adele may stem from the fact that she’s overplayed (I don’t listen to the radio very often, but whenever I do, a song of hers will come on) and she comes across as a lower class trash bag who can sing a bit. Personally, I think the latter is the biggest reason why Jarv doesn’t like her. The fact that she’s chubby is just an easy (and cheap) way to express a dislike for her in general.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        Skyfall is an awful Bond theme, it might be one of the worst ones because the song is terrible, busting on her for being a large Marge is just gravy on the cake.

      • Continentalop says :

        Ok, that’s legit criticism.

        But I actually thought the song Skyfall was an improvement from last movie’s theme by Jack White and Alicia Keys, which isn’t sayin’ much.

      • Judge Droid says :

        Of the recent Bond songs, I liked Chris Cornells for Casino Royale. But I like Soundgarden so that may be somewhat biased.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        It’s also legit to call her a fat pig since she’s you know a fat pig.

      • Continentalop says :

        I’m not even a big Sound Garden fan and I thought that one of the better modern Bond themes.

      • Continentalop says :

        Ah, but is it legit when it isn’t the issue?

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        Sure it is every time I’ve seen her she looks like an extra large sumo wrestler that just ate a smaller Sumo.

      • Continentalop says :

        I will say now that she has money there is no excuse for being that fat.

        You don’t even have to exercise much. You can hire someone to pick your meals and food, so you don’t even tax your willpower.

      • just pillow talk says :

        I concur with Droid on the Cornell song and on Soundgarden…which I believe are coming out with a new album.

      • koutchboom says :

        Sound Garden just released a new cd. They vomited out the theme song for Vengers as well, god that was pathetic. I hear the cd though isn’t as terrible as that fucking thing was.

      • kloipy says :

        I liked Adele’s song for Bond. To me it sounded like Bond. Like if I heard it without seeing the movie I would automatically think ‘that’s a James Bond theme’. I don’t love her stuff, but I think she has a great singing voice (not so much a talking voice). Honestly thought the song was the best part of the movie which was (other than Deakins’s work) just blah

      • Jarv says :

        a lower class trash bag who can sing a bit. Personally, I think the latter is the biggest reason why Jarv doesn’t like her

        She’s a fucking greedy Tax dodging lower class trash bag.

        That she weighs the same as the QE2 is just making it an easy target.

        I detest her music for basically being lift music in waiting, and there’s not one redeeming feature to her. She’s the musical equivalent of Richard Curtis films: Music for people that don’t like music. The mock-tudor gulag inhabiting cretins of our middle classes lap her up, but she’s basically fucking dreadful on every conceivable level.

        Skyfall was a shit bond theme, because it was a blatant Shirley Bassey rip off. It was better than Madonna’s, which isn’t saying much, but let’s try to have a bit of originality.

      • Judge Droid says :

        greedy Tax dodging

        Which makes her no different to anyone else with money in this country.

  20. Jarv says :

    Mummy? Meh.
    Van Helsing? Meh

    Jesus. Are there no original ideas?

  21. Just Pillow Talk says :

    Caught most of Faster last night….which I do like quite a bit. But the assassin really is a bit worthless. I think he gets more annoying on repeat viewings. I completely forgot it’s Liam taken daughter in there.

  22. Judge Droid says :

    I haven’t really watched any movies lately. I was watching Police Squad last night. I haven’t seen them for a while, but they play like a highlights reel of the Naked Gun series. Very funny (and more than a little silly).

    Capt. Ed Hocken: Frank, I know you got Sally’s arrest record from R & I, but how did you ever figure out she was the one behind the loan office heist?
    Det. Frank Drebin: Just a little hunch back at the office.
    Capt. Ed Hocken: I thought so. Because I brought that little hunchback with me. Charlie, come out here!

    hehehe

  23. Judge Droid says :

    The bastard child of WALL-E and Portal.

  24. Just Pillow Talk says :

    Whoa…did the site change a bit or was it my phone?

  25. Judge Droid says :

    Apart from Hugh Dancy, this actually looks like it could be good.

  26. tombando says :

    I liked Skyfall ok, ditto Adele. She wants to be Dusty Springfield.

  27. tombando says :

    True about the auto-tuned stuff. Rihanna’s prob. the main offender.

  28. tombando says :

    So, Speaking of Bond–what is the general feeling here towards The Living Daylights??? from ’87, Dalton’s first foray into same.

    • just pillow talk says :

      I would say better than all but one of pussy Bronson’s….better than some of Moore’s. Better than Quantum too.

    • coltighfighter says :

      The Living Daylights is one of my all time favourite Bonds. Dalton was a fantastic, dark Bond in this.

      Great cast with Joe Don Baker and Art Malik. Loved the whole milkman taking out a secret MI6 stately home, and loved the whole car on ice/skiing on a cello case stuff.

      Cool opening on Gibralter too. All in all, a very good Bond.

      Now let the ripping begin 🙂

  29. Judge Droid says :

    Watched DeepStar Six. They managed to rip off The Abyss and Leviathan wholesale, yet still be unfathomably (see what I did there!?) boring. What a waste of time. Damn you Jarv.

    • Xiphos0311 says :

      If it’s unfathomably boring then they did rip off The Abyss.

      • Jarv says :

        Deep Star Six has some goodness to it. The exploding douchebag in the tank for example.

        Leviathan is much better.

      • Judge Droid says :

        That was the only highlight in an otherwise dull as dogshit movie. That and Ferrer, because he’s never not entertaining. It takes forever to get to the monster, and when it does it’s just an early graboid prototype. And it’s some sort of prehistoric sea monster who has lived at the bottom of the ocean for a millenia, and it just swims to the surface to pursue two boring douchebags? Bah!

  30. Continentalop says :

    Fuck. I don’t even think she’s six and she already gets slipping and bobbing & weaving, and snap on her jab.

    • Xiphos0311 says :

      how come most adult boxers, especially heavy weights, can’t learn the basic like that? Fucking tomato cans

      • Continentalop says :

        Well, here in the states I think it is because most heavyweights don’t get into boxing when their young any more. It seems like the fall back sport for big guys who just aren’t good enough be in football or basketball.

        Outside of the US I have no explanation.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        Fat lazy slobs that give the division a bad name.

      • Jarv says :

        We’ve just exported Tyson Fury to go and fight in the states. Fat fucking Pikey.

        He’s run away from Britain because of “racism” against him for being a fucking gippo.

        Not that he’s probably the 3rd best British Heaveyweight (if that prick Hayes comes back). He’ll go and beat up 3rd rate bums in the states and pick up a dodgy title of some description.

  31. koutchboom says :

    FUCK!!! Like I need more things to watch on TV. Red Widow starts this weekend and History channel releases it’s GoT killer and the start of some cool looking Bible miniseries with Keith David. AND All Star Celebrity Apprentice starts this weekend as well.

    • Toadkillerdog says :

      Boomer, did you catch Vikings? It was shockingly good.

      • koutchboom says :

        I got it recorded will watch tonight. Good to hear that its good, that trailer looked good. I also recorded The Bible.

      • Toadkillerdog says :

        I was impressed. The violence and sex are at pg-13 levels, but the are done in such a way that it looks like soft R, if such a thing existed. The locations and sets are great and the acting is very good

  32. Just Pillow Talk says :

    Demolition man is not good…slightly better than dredd.

    On plus side…the magnificent seven.

  33. Continentalop says :

    Wlast week and this weekends viewings:

    The Social Network: not sure how accurate it is (probably not very) but nevertheless I enjoyed it. No really like able characters but in truth that’s what a group of uber-nerds would be like, a bunch of angry and petty assholes. The movie reminds me I made the right move to quit Facebook.

    The Green Lantern: I already mentioned this, absolute shit. And, no, it didn’t have to be. There is a kernel of a good idea in the concept, they just blew it by being lazy and incompetent.

    We Need to Talk About Kevin: Good movie that was over-directed and had an incongruent sound track. I thought it would have been better considering how much I liked Lynne Ramsay’s Movern Callar.

    The Descendents: Alexander Paine’s movies are starting to become a predictable genre in itself. ELECTION is still his best movie and, unfortunately, the outlier. Call me when you go back in that direction.

    Sweeney Todd: nice visuals, paper thin plots. Broadway Musicals make horrible material for movies. Completely different mediums. The twain should not meet.

    Trollhunter: Dumb but fun. I don’t like found footage movies, but this was enjoyable.

    The Tall Blonde Man With One Black Shoe: classic French comedy remade in the states as the pedestrian The Man With One Ref Shoe. Francis Verber wrote it but not as good as his later stuff which he directed. Still has one of the funniest and sexiest scenes where they reveal half-an-ass crack.

    The Train: It’s John Frankenhiemer directing Burt Lancaster. Has one of the most graceful stunts by Lancaster ever. Good movie.

    Moon: Very impressed. Obviously inspired by 2001, BLADE RUNNER and, especially, SILENT RUNNING. Also reminded me of THE DISAPEARANCE OF ALICE CREED in its ability to tell a complex, character driven story with effeciancy and minimal locations or characters. Highly recommend.

  34. Jarv says :

    Weekend viewing:

    Desperado. Mint.

    Club Dread. Awful- Jay whatever his name is has a horrible fake English accent and I wanted to pummel him into dust.

    More BSG. Just endured a whole episodes of unsubtle political allegory masquerading as “spot the cylon”. Also, who gives a fuck about this cunt stuck on Caprica? Fuck him. Get on with the story. Oh, and flashbacks officially blow.

    Detention. Not sure how to go on this one. It’s terrible, obviously, and is kind of like the bastard lovechild of Easy A, Kuffs, and Scream, but there are good things to it. Review coming.

    Casa Di Mi Padre: Brilliant. Stunning, actually. Nails Telenovellas right to the fucking wall, from the dialogue, acting, and, superbly, shot composition. Also has a couple of legitimate laugh out loud moments. And I hate Will Ferrell. Supremely underrated, and review coming. Also, Genesis whatshername who was also in Man on a Ledge is ridiculously hot.

    Lethal Weapon 1 and 2. I like them.

  35. Jarv says :

    Australia being gubbed in the cricket.

    And seen that Fast-Track Aussie nationalisation so they can cap that 31 year old Pakistani? At least England made the likes of Trott play in the counties for 5 years.

    He’s been in Australia fuck all time.

  36. Jarv says :

    I’m really worried about Phil Hughes playing himself out of the Aussie side. 19 off 57 in the first innings, following on from his wretched failure in the first test.

    Also, feeling very, very sorry for Pattinson and Fugly. They’re working their tits off in typically Indian conditions to see Maxwell and Doherty throw pies at the other end.

    India have just dropped both Warner and Cowan. If Warner gets away, the Aussies could put a dent in this deficit (which is huge)

    • Judge Droid says :

      Cowan and Warner fucking NEED to score runs. Both have been dismal with an occasional blip of tolerable for ages. Phil Hughes will destroy England! DESTROY THEM I SAY!

      Fuck I hate the Indian cricket team.

      • Jarv says :

        I too hate the Indian cricket team. And they’re shit.

        Hughes is an enigma, when he was poo earlier, it was “well at least he scores quickly.

        Now he’s poo and scoring slowly.

        Leave the poor lad alone to learn his game, and stop jamming him in. Play Watto at 3.

        Fixed.

      • Judge Droid says :

        Actually, I’d open with Warner and Watson. Cowan at 3. Clarke at 4. Someone who doesn’t exist yet at 5. Wade at 6. etc etc

        A Warner/Watson opening partnership just makes me think of Desmond Haynes and Gordon Greenidge. Oh happy days.

  37. Jarv says :

    Which makes her no different to anyone else with money in this country.

    Most of them aren’t stupid enough to come out and complain about how they’re being fleeced by the tax man while dodging 90% of it.

    And being a hypocrite about it as well.

    • Judge Droid says :

      Your secret identity has been revealed (again).

      • Jarv says :

        Fuckssakes.

        It’s because this shitty work computer automatically fills out all the boxes even if I’m logged in (I can’t use the comment stream).

        Deleted it.

        Best be off. Got new Website to populate.

        Will drop in later.

        PS- Warner and Cowan both been dropped, but now put on 50 partnership. Slowly, though, which is about right, given the hole they’re in.

    • Judge Droid says :

      Yes, most do it and pretend they don’t. Not sure which is better here.

    • Xiphos0311 says :

      Wait hungry hungry hippo is a tax dodger? OK now I’m starting to like her. It’s the duty of all high earning patriots to find a way to fuck the bureaucrats and oligarchs out of as much filthy ill gotten and stolen lucre the scumbags forcibly extract via the tax code.

      • Jarv says :

        I thought she’d ducked it, but was wrong. She paid it- too stupid to avoid it like most people. She just whined about it and was astonishingly graceless.

        The thing is, this is what the moaning cow said:

        I’m mortified to have to pay 50 percent! [While] I use the NHS…I’ve gotta give you, like, four million quid — are you having a laugh?

        and

        When I got my tax bill in from ’19’ [her debut album], I was ready to go and buy a gun and randomly open fire

        She’s a fat fucking moron.

      • Judge Droid says :

        If I was her, I’d be more concerned the the size of her pie bill.

  38. Jarv says :

    Warner gone.

    You around on the 16th? It’s the last weekend of the 6 Nations, so is a massive All Day session in the making.

    England go second, so I can ignore the first game, but the Grand Slam should be on. Except it’s fucking Wales in Cardiff.

    Bah.

    • Jarv says :

      Hughes gone for a miserable duck off 9 balls.

      Since recall he’s had 5 tests, 9 innings, 258 runs at a strike rate of 50.68.

      Top score 87 at home v Sri Lanka.

      Out 4 times bowled, 1 run out, 1 LBW and 3 catches, which does at least suggest he’s not hanging his bat outside off stump any more.

      Feel really sorry for that poor fucker they dropped to accommodate this shitness.

  39. kloipy says :

    Watch List

    Escape from Planet Earth- the kloipette seemed to enjoy it. i fell asleep in the theater for the first time ever. Predicatable kids film, has a few funny moments, but if you don’t have kids, there is nothing to see here

    Gasland- interesting doc about fracking in my home state.

    Ken Burns’s doc about the Lewis and Clark expidition- facisnating and entertaining look at the journey with great narration and structure as all of Burns’s docs are

    Argo- Highly enjoyed this one. Definitely cements Afflecks status as a good director. I still don’t think he’s done his best work yet, but this was a really enjoyable film handled extremely well

  40. Judge Droid says :

    hehehehe Bats is a wee bit out of shape, but still getting the job done.

    http://www.guardian.co.uk/uk/2013/mar/04/batman-delivers-suspect-bradford-police

  41. Continentalop says :

    Yeah, Casa de mi Padre is surprisingly good, even if it is pretty much a one joke movie.

    The “missing reel” part was one of the funniest things I’ve ever seen.

    • Jarv says :

      That missing reel is absolute genius.

      One of the three best jokes in the film- the other one being the wedding sequence, and the “dirty rancher” song.

      I also like Raul’s death.

      So much of that film is absolutely bang on the Telenovellas. It’s inspired.

    • Jarv says :

      Can’t take much more of Battlestar Galatcica.

      Orangutan of Doom.

      It’s terrible. Luckily the most recent “who’s the cylon” episode pissed Mrs. Jarv off so much that she’s almost ready to bin it.

      There was a good one with a space battle afterwards, but I’m bored of Starbuck being the best pilot, the best tactician, the best interrogator, the best marksman and so on and so forth.

      The crap Islam analogies can fuck off as well.

  42. tombando says :

    Weekend Viewing:

    *The Lion King. The Missus isn’t a toon fan but hadn’t seen it before, was sold on the Hakuna Matatta stuff. Enjoyable.

    *Elmer Gantry–I caught 75% of it save for last half hour. Was quite good thru there–Lancaster and Simmons and Jones all at their best. Well done.

    *Legend of the Superheroes–1978 live Action Super Friends Hanna Barbara Caper/Roast abomination w/ Adam West, Burt Ward, Ed McMahon(!), Frank Gorshin. I have a vague idea I’ve seen some of it, very very bad. Do Not Watch. Garret Morris best part of this.

    *Godzilla vs. Megalon-they reuse all the combat footage from other, Better Kaiju movies. Jeg Jaguar for the Win! Sorta. Awful.

    *The Return of Captn Invincible. Holy shit–Alan Arkin and Christopher Lee in VERY bad, painful Aussie Superman spoof from ’83, it’s a blasted MUSICAL of all things. Don’t watch unless you like Trainwrecks. Arkin in this?! I know Lee will do anything for a buck, but whoa.

    I know I saw something else, but for the time being that’ll do.

    • Continentalop says :

      Hahaha. Legends of the Superheroes and Captain Invincible? Haven’t seen either since I was a kid. I know Legends sucks – although it did have Huntress and Dr. Silvani, which I thought was cool as a kid – but I hoped Capt. Invincible, the Man of Magnetism, would hold up. Funny thing is, I don’t remember it being a musical.

  43. tombando says :

    Oh I also saw the Astro Zombies w/ Wendall Corey and John Carradine. Wow. Bad.

    Captain Invincible was filmed and set in Sydney.

  44. Jarv says :

    Talking about Australia- absolutely humiliated by India.

    They’re pathetic, an utter shambles. This is terrible for a number of reasons:

    1) I never want India to win.
    2) They may drop half the crap clogging up the team and pick decent players for the Ashes.
    3) If Clarke is using up his bad run now, he’ll be on fire for the summer.
    4) India will be unbearably arrogant again.

  45. Jarv says :

    If I were an Aussie selector, I’d be looking at the likes of Jacques for the Ashes. Badly need to shore up this shitty batting side, and I’d want players that know the conditions.

    Shouldn’t have shunted Mr. Cricket off into retirement. Or Katich for that matter. Need a steady hand in the order somewhere, as it looks like if Clarke doesn’t score then they’re fecked.

    • Judge Droid says :

      Quite fucking embarrassing really. I hope we’ve not turned into a side that can’t travel.

      I’d like to reiterate… I hate the Indian cricket team!

      • Jarv says :

        Quite fucking embarrassing is an understatement. Lost by 9 wickets in the first test and an innings and a shit load of runs in the second. To a piss poor Indian side that England just beat in India.

        I don’t even have the heart to take the piss out of you for it. I should, really, but you’re that bad it seems pointless.

        Anyway, you free on the 16th?

      • Judge Droid says :

        Possibly. I’ll have to get back to you on it.

  46. Jarv says :

    40th Anniversary of The Rocky Horror Picture Show this year.

    It’s touring again, as a result.

    Only place I can find that’s not stupid is Richmond in May. Do you fancy going?

  47. Jarv says :

    With the missus, obviously. It’s weird to go to that in a group of blokes.

  48. Continentalop says :

    Damn. While men’s skills in boxing deteriorate, women’s skills are drastically improving.

  49. Continentalop says :

    http://www.youtube.com/embed/S5zfx5zCUwQ?feature=player_embedded” frameborder=”0″ allowfullscreen>

  50. Judge Droid says :

    If it wasn’t for the oppressively loud music overpowering this trailer, I’d actually be pretty impressed.

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