Burt Gummer’s Rec Room- August 2012 Archive

A gathering place for firearms enthusiasts, paranoid survivalists and those who worship at the Church of Chang 

August. It’s high summer, and perfection is dustier than a camel’s shitter. We’re hemmed in here like a smorgasboard for the graboids. Best break out the Elephant Gun.

Disclaimer: This is the part of the Church that is the most no holds barred. None of it is intended with malice, and although it can on occasion seem a little bit fraught, it is banter rather than venom. So, be warned that this is like taking a naked swim in a piranha tank and not recommended for the faint of heart.

523 responses to “Burt Gummer’s Rec Room- August 2012 Archive”

  1. Jarv says :

    Writing an essay on Censorship, because I’ve never done anything like this before.

  2. koutchboom says :

    WHOA! He hasn’t blown his brains out yet!


  3. koutchboom says :

    FInally saw Cowboys & Aliens, and I finally get the title….Cowboys & Indians. Man the movie falls into that Tomb Raider films category where it’s like….IT’S ALL HERE…I SHOULD BE REALLY ENJOYING THIS! But it’s just sort of souless and humorless and in the end it was just there, it was nice but who gives a shit. The opening 5-10 minutes are probably the best thing Fatrow will ever film, lot of promise in that opening scene then it just sort of fizzles into nothing. Still Fat Row’s best film, save for maybe Elf?

    It’s odd how he presents himself as this sort of humor guy but then his movies are completely void of comedy (again save for Elf, which is really only funny because of Will), and RDJ being dickish in IM doesn’t count. I guess Fatrow wants to be some serious action director? I think had C&A had more fun it would’ve been pretty damn good. I think Bond was mis cast, he’s accent was fucking weird. Ford was miscast as well, sort of a useless role, much better suited for Elf star James Caan. IDK who would’ve done better in the lead, probably someone younger than Harrison Ford to start. And also all the side characters were worthless.

    The final thing I hated about the movie was it’s overuse of the orange and teel look, way way over done. At 2 hours and a million minutes it should’ve been funnier. Or if he wanted more stoic, broding stuff he should’ve gone shorter. I mean the movie only has 5-6 pages of dialog in the whole damn thing. It’s an interesting miss, and probably the closest Fatrow will get to a decent action film. He was also mis cast as the director and cameo, fuck someone like David Twohy would’ve done something fun with this at least.

    • Jarv says :

      That’s harsh on IM 1.

      I know that IM2 is horseshit, but IM1 is highly watchable.

      I don’t like Fatrow either.

      • koutchboom says :

        IM 1 took such a nose dive on repeat viewings, something I think has been agreed upon here, it was sad. I didn’t like it that much to begin with in theaters, but at home jesus was it worthless. It’s like all his films even fucking Made, just sort of ramble on into nothingness and boring. His movies are like a study of mediocrity.

        When people bitch about summer tent pole movies being nothing but noise and sound, I don’t think of Bay because at least Bay has style (love it or hate it), I think of Fatrow. Just these bland styless films that seem to just exist to show off their bland special effects. Even Elf bores the shit out of me, I don’t think I’ve ever managed to make it through a viewing of it without falling asleep, even when I saw it in theaters. IM1 when I saw it in theaters I almost came close to falling asleep. Dude just bores the shit out of life.

        Also thinking about it…Dax Sheeppard was in the Fatrow directed Zathura!

      • Jarv says :

        Yeah, saw that yesterday. Don’t remember him in it.

        It’s true, that IM1 really dives on second watch.

      • koutchboom says :

        He’s the astronaut, I think he gets frozen for half of the movie.

      • Jarv says :

        I barely remember that film, to be honest.

      • koutchboom says :

        Yeah I’m pretty sure no one does. I just happen to see a preview for it recently since HD Net is going to be showing it this month and was reminded that it even fucking existed.

      • Jarv says :

        Isn’t it basically a Jumanji rip off but in space (of all things)?

        That’s about as far as I remember.

      • koutchboom says :

        Well it’s the sequel to Jumanji, they were both books written by the same guy. I’ve never read the books so I don’t know if they are connected in anyway besides both being about board games. But they are kids books.

        I HAVE READ the novelization of Jumanji the movie though, that was really good. For some reason I find the novelization of movies fun. I’ve only read a couple though and Jumanji just happened to be one.

      • Jarv says :

        I remember reading the novelisation of Gremlins 2 when I was a kid. That was fun.

      • koutchboom says :

        Hehehe Jumanji the book came out in 1981, and at the end of the book Dunst and Guy throw the board game out the window and two boys pick it up and carry it home. SLAME CUT to 2002 when Zathura the book comes out and the two boys who found the board game in one FINALLY get home to play it, they get bored with Jumanji then go out and find another game called Zathura.

        OHHH it’s from the bloke who did the Polar Express. So the books are amazing then.

      • Jarv says :

        That is quite funny.

    • Bartleby says :

      I enjoyed cowboys and aliens, but I know what you mean. It isn’t a mash-up like it should be, it’s pretty much here’s a straight-forward western, and thn here’s a straight-forward 50s sci-fi. There’s some overlap, but it’s not some zany movie or really inventive comedy like it could have been.

      The idea called for something wacky, but it’s just sort of there. Same problem I had with Abe Lincoln. Too bland for the concept.

      • Jarv says :

        Try Strippers v Werewolves. It’s not award worthy, but it is fun.

      • koutchboom says :

        Abe succeeds in execution and style though. It’s inventive and fun and doesn’t drag. You’ll like it better when you actually see it. Also the casting is good on Abe, and you could tell they weren’t taking themselves all super serious lik C&A was.

      • Jarv says :

        I wish they’d done Pride and Prejudice and Zombies first.

      • Bartleby says :

        I hope you are right, but I doubt I’ll come around. It just felt bland to me. I will give it another shot on DVD.

        Have you seen Paranorman and Expendables 2 yet?

        Paranorman was terrific and Expendables 2 was the movie the first one should have been.

      • koutchboom says :

        Naw after Rises I’m pretty much done with cinema for the rest of ought twelve.

      • Jarv says :




      • koutchboom says :

        And I suspect I major flip flopping on Abe once it hits dvds just like Clash.

      • Bartleby says :

        that;’s really a shame, because I thought you’d have gone out to support Step-Up. Are you telling me then, that there is a step-up movie I’ve seen that koutch hasn’t?

      • Jarv says :



      • koutchboom says :

        Hehehe naw I saw Step Up, it was a blast, not as good as 3 though. You didn’t read my piece on AIBN?

        I mean I WANT to see Total Recall and EX2 and Paranorman (probably will see that soon since the wife wants to go), I just can’t muster any enthusiasm to go/pay for it. I have free tickets to Thunderstruck tonight, and I MAY have free tickets to that JGL Paperboy movie but I’d rather go see U2 Rattle and Hum outdoors tonight and then watch Waterworld or Rises on IMAX on thursday.

        I just can’t see myself PAYING to see another movie whilst Rises is still in IMAX, because I’ll just sit there knowing I’d rather be watching that. I was gonna see Rises again tonight but the IMAX is down today because some power outtage last night fucked it up. Kind of pissed about that, so it’s out door movie tonight. Which have been a blast wish they just did them year round or at least until it got MUCH MUCH colder, only tonight and next week left.

      • Bartleby says :

        I see what you are getting at. I don’t think I’ve often felt like that though. It sounds strange, but Dark City for its two weeks in theater was like that. I recall buying a ticket for Man in the Iron Mask or Lost in Space or some toss, and saying ‘screw it’ and just getting up and walking into the dark city theater and watching it again.

        See Expendables 2 over Total Recall, although the visuals in Recall do sort of qualify it for the big screen.

      • koutchboom says :

        Yeah I am surprised I’ve felt this way about Rises, mainly because I wasn’t a giant TDK fan. But I am glad I can still that way about a film.

        And yeah I know I’ll probably dig Total Recall and EX2, I just at least need to see Rises 1 more time…if not 2. Its in IMAX for like 1 1/2 more weeks before Indiana Jones 1 comes in…then maybe I can get back to caring about what’s in theaters.

      • Bartleby says :

        I think I just like the really visually extravagant films. I saw Tree of Life a couple of times, the Fall a few times in theaters, and Fifth Element like three times back in 1997. Anything like that just hooks me from the get-go usually. Which is again why Cloud Atlas holds so much interest.

      • koutchboom says :

        I’m with you on The Fall and Fifth Element, they are probably in my top ten…well I know they are. I watch them whenever they are on. Don’t know why I just don’t own The Fall?

        Tree Of Life….that was a one timer for me, just a tad too boring. I’ll trade you that for Tron Legacy, man that thing holds up well and that cartoon show is amazing. I do really like the Fountain though. I haven’t seen that since the theater I should check that out again.

      • Jarv says :

        I honestly don’t get the love for Fifth Element. It’s good and everything, but I wouldn’t blow my spuds over it.

      • Bartleby says :

        I have come to quite enjoyTron Legacy. I dont think it’s a really great movie, but I find myself watching it quite often in blu-ray,and I’ve made one of my young nephews a convert to it. It’s his fave movie, even over star wars, and his family is frustrated I gave him a copy because he just keeps watching it over and over again.

        There are many things I wish were different on it, but the combo of score and imagery is mostly good, floating bridges head aside.

      • Jarv says :

        No. Tron Legacy is mince. The soundtrack is incredible, and totally wasted.

      • Bartleby says :

        I dont think it’s mince. It’s a sequel to Tron, it is what it is. I personally enjoyed it more than the original. I dont think either is a great shakes, but I think it’s not bad for a follow-up to that universe.

        The script should have been much, much better.

      • koutchboom says :

        Has he seen the cartoon? The cartoon is very very very very very good.

        There are some amazing cartoons out right now. Tron, Clone Wars, Kung Fu Panda and Dragons.

        Ultimate Spiderman and Avengers kind of blow, mainly cause they look like they were made in 1996. Motorcity is ok, but it’s very childish.

      • Bartleby says :

        He showed me the cartoon. I was surprised by it. I think I heard Lance Henriksen in there somewhere? I can’t always tell. His stint as the voice of ‘Droid’ has left me muddled as to what’s a real Lance and whats a fake.

      • koutchboom says :

        Yeah Lance is the main bad guy in it. Elijah wood is the main guy, and Tron is Tron. Pee Wee is in there somewhere as is Mandy Moore and Emmanuel Chiriqui.

      • Bartleby says :

        cool..I like the fact Tron is back. I hope they get a chance to do a third, but is it ever explained what happened to Kevin Flynn? Was he absorbed? Are he and Clu merged now?

        Also thought it was a rip that the movie is called tron legacy and Tron himself is basically like voodoo snake eyes until one minor second towards the end.

      • Jarv says :

        The voice of droid? That’s the deep breathing on many dropped phones in London.

      • Bartleby says :

        haha…Droid phones…sorry for the confusion.

      • koutchboom says :

        It’s more akin to John Carter, which also isn’t very fun or inventive and is all too serious….while not being as serious as the books, and no one looked like they were having fun with that movie. I give C&A the edge over John just because C&A’s opening scene was better than anything in John.

        And I know you guys don’t like ID4, but both movies could’ve used a lot of that William Smith charm from that movie. I mean niether Kitsch nor Bond ever muttered anything cool or bad ass the whole time.

      • Jarv says :

        ID4 is a crap film, but Big Willy style exudes charisma in almost everything he’s in.

      • Bartleby says :

        I still disagree about Carter, which I have found quite entertaining on repeats. You are right about Kitsch, but then neither film would have been saved by Will Smith. I actually dont hate ID4, I enjoy it for what it is, but think it falls short of the movie it wanted to be. But Smith stood out there because he was bringing charm to a mostly 2 dimensional character, which is indeed what Carter and Craig’s cowboy were.

  4. Bartleby says :

    the books are great because they are just picture books, as is Polar Express. They also have limited text and don’t look anything like the movie versions of either. The author/artist is Chris Van Allsburg and they are just good-looking books that are fun to read with your kids.

    I didnt care much for Jumanji, I recall enjoying Zathura, but that was it. Can’t specifically recall much of either one now.

  5. Bartleby says :

    I know Im setting myself up for fail but I think Cloud Atlas is one of my most anticipated films of the remainder of the year.

    • Jarv says :

      Me too.

      Sightseers as well.

      I’ve got Dredd, Sightseers and Cloud Atlas left. If they’re all good, then it’s a good year.

    • koutchboom says :

      Yeah my money is on Cloud. I AM really excited about that. Just rewatched Matrix the other day still great looking….only now I realize Fishborn was really that ugly in 1. I’m pretty much already sold on Atlas, I think most people will hate it.

      • Jarv says :

        I agree. There’s a high chance that people are going to loathe that one. It’s being a touch missold, because the future bits (which are spectacular) are only a tiny part of the film.

        And what fatass Hanks is doing appearing multiple times is lost on me.

        DREDD!!! Get with the programme, fuck’s sake man.

      • Bartleby says :

        I think it looks like the movie Fountain had convinced me it was. Although, I do quite love The Fountain, it’s not really the movie the trailers and hype were selling us.

      • Jarv says :

        How did you end up in Spam?

      • Bartleby says :

        Dredd? I unfortunately dont think its going to be very good Jarv. I hope Im totally wrong, but I suspect I’m not. I know the points you have made for it, but it just has Lockout 2 written all over it in my mind. If it’s great, then I thinkk that would be wonderful.

        When does this movie Branded come out? I thought it was September, but i haven’t heard much of a peep recently.

        The original Matrix is still a great movie. And I’m one of the five people including Koutch who likes Speed Racer. Its helpful that Tykwer is onboard for it too.

      • Jarv says :

        It has to be good. It’s not allowed to be shit. I need The Dark Judges.

        *has little cry*

      • koutchboom says :

        Oh yeah Echo…3? Did you see that? Its on netflix instant so I was gonna check it out.

        Since no one else could answer my question: Black Pond or Noise?

        Maybe you can?

        I can answer for Black Pond (third best Croc flick of 2006) but not Noise will watch that this week sometime.

      • koutchboom says :

        Oh yeah Branded looks good….but so did Repomen. Also from what I’ve heard with Dredd is that it’s pretty much The Raid with future guns.

      • Jarv says :

        You make that sound like a bad thing.

        Repomen wasn’t bad. I’ve seen Repo girl and it kind of sucks. There’s the odd good joke in there, but it runs out of steam.

      • koutchboom says :

        It’s not a terrible thing, I’m just saying these out of left field SyFy high concept movies are very hit or miss. Repo Men was OK but the trailer is much better than the actual film. Same with say something like Daybreakers. I guess Pandorum was better than the trailers. I mean I HOPE Branded is good. But I doubt it’ll be like District 9 good.

      • Jarv says :

        I like Pandorum. It’s very close to greatness, but loses it with the very obvious twist and ending.

      • Jarv says :

        Black Pond? The Langham one?

        Tyrannosaur or Kill List.

      • Bartleby says :

        3? What’s that? I’ll check it out if its on netflix.

        Black Pond? I liked it a bit, although I think the presence of the kiddie porn purveyor hindered what was otherwise a solid little movie.

        Ok, wait, I’ve read the rest of what you said…You mean Black Water? I kind of thought that was a bit boring but not terrible.

        Noise? the one that’s about a small town and a murderer or something? I just put that in my queue the other day. I need to see it.

        I just watched, for the first time ever, Don’t Look Now from Nicolas Roeg. Damn, that was a creepy movie.

      • Jarv says :

        Great film that. MIDGET’s for the win.

      • Bartleby says :

        omg…I didnt see that coming til the last five minutes, when I turned to my wife and said ‘why is it rocking side to side, kids don’t rock when they walk!’

      • koutchboom says :

        Yeah Black Water. Agreed about the boring, but good low/no budget film. In the end I liked Primeval and Rouge better and in that order.

        And yeah that’s Noise, I guess we shall see if maybe that Aussie film will be a nice find.

        3 is a Twyker movie.

      • Droid says :

        I reviewed that last year.

      • Jarv says :

        Which I now can’t find

      • Bartleby says :

        it probably ended up in spam because the filter couldnt fathom that a normal person could love The Fountain.

  6. Bartleby says :

    ok, I’ve just looked up 3 and I initially thought I had found the wrong film. Nah, I think I’ll pass on this, Tykwer or not. I’ve learned from Perfume that he can’t take an already dicey subject and make a good movie out of it.

  7. Jarv says :


    I received this lovely email from WordPress last night:

    Hi there Jarv,

    Congrats! We’ve picked your post ( https://moonwolves.wordpress.com/2012/08/22/jarv-has-sympathy-for-the-devil-and-takes-a-look-at-censorship/ ) to appear on Freshly Pressed on the WordPress home page.

    We really enjoyed your look at the film ratings and censorship, and we know the rest of the WordPress community will too. Your post will appear on the site in the next day or two, so get ready to welcome your new readers.


    Oh and happy fucking birthday to me.

  8. Jarv says :

    I’ve been tinkering, and have turned on Ratings. So please leave a star thingy after each post. It should then repress the most popular ones at the bottom of the page.

  9. Jarv says :

    Right. Bored of that now.

    • Jarv says :

      Fecking hell.

      GCSE results are down! For the first time ever.

      Our English results have plummeted. They’ve clearly shifted the curve. While half of me thinks “about time”, it’s incredibly harsh on the students.

  10. tombando says :

    Edward G Robinson double header time: Woman in the Window and The Stranger. Window has Fritz Lang directing, Joan Bennett is beautiful, EG plays a nerd, Duryea his usual slimy weasel self. Film is a bit sedate and has a copout ending. Its ok though.

    Stranger has Orson Welles as Nazi in a Connecticut town, EG is a G man on his tail, Loretta Young as usual bats her eyes and is in a totally different film. Good movie.

  11. Col. Tigh-Fighter says :

    Happy birthday, Mr Jarv. Here’s a little present from me.

  12. Col. Tigh-Fighter says :

    I’m having a super busy time at the moment. Im doing a series for short films for Sky, written by celebs. We’ve got Alison Steadman recounting the time she went to the Cavern club and saw the Beatles (cue trying to find a Cavern Club!), Paul O’Grady recounting the time he saw the Exorcist in the cinema and had nightmares, and Idris Elba, in a piece that he has written, and is going to make his directorial debut, all about a shoe fetishist and a homeless man! lol.

    I must admit I am greatly looking forward to meeting Idris, but right now, he is in South Africa playing Nelson Mandela! So having to everything by email and Skype.

    Fun, fun, fun! Wish me luck, and hope I dont screw it up!

    PS. Please go on the new Emirates Airline cablecar. I volunteered to do a piece to camera for a friend about the Great Fire of London (somethning I know about). Little did I know its become part of an interactive feature on the cable car. If you click on a link on your phone when you look towards Pudding Lane, then apparently up I pop to tell you all about it!

    The first I heard about it was when a friend tagged me on facebook when she saw a bloody poster of me at the station looking wistfully into the distance! LOL That’ll teach me to volunteer for things 🙂

    Hope the Wolves are well. I do pop in, even if I dont post much.

  13. Barfy says :

    Wishing you everything happy for your birthday Jarv. Enjoy.

  14. Tom Bando says :

    Oh happy birthday Jarv. Your boxed set of complete Travolta out-takes is enroute.

  15. koutchboom says :

    Ew that should be interesting to see what sort of responses the censor article gets. I hope some crazies come along.

  16. Droid says :

    Depp’s signed on for POTC 5. £60m!!! Hard to say no, but jesus Depp. How much is enough?

  17. Droid says :

    WTF is going on with Shia the Beef?


  18. Jarv says :

    Well on course for best day ever.

  19. Droid says :

    Jarv, were we catching up for a beer this weekend?

  20. koutchboom says :

    WELL looks like I missed the big event today. Seems Xi properly scared off any new fans we may have gotten.

    BUT I have good reason. I come to work as I am prone to do. Sit down and I get a “Koutchboom, can you come here for a second. Close the door.”


    You are in the top users of bandwidth………SHIT!

    And these are stats from July….and it’s August 24th…..and I’m still in my probation period. So he says well luckily you are a good worker otherwise you would just be fired, just don’t let it happen next month…..but these stats are from July????!!!!

    So I told him I’ll probably be in the top users for August as well, and he says i SHOULD be ok just show how you haven’t used it since todays verbal warning.

    I give some attempt to defend myself, and he says…”well it’s gonna be hard to prove ‘werewolves on the moon'” has anything to do with work”



    We change the name to:


  21. Droid says :

    Jiminy Cricket. I challenge ANYONE to make it through this trailer. I didn’t think Luca$h could sink any lower, but this takes the cake.

  22. tombando says :

    Saw Expendables Too. Enjoyed same.

  23. Continentalop says :

    I think we really have to start looking for a new lead for the Dyketective. Lindsey is going to be dead or in jail by the time we start shooting it.


  24. Jarv says :

    Weekend viewing:

    Fuck all in the way of films, but I did watch all of Red Dwarf and drink too much.

    • Jarv says :

      Upcoming films:

      Mildly curious about Spring Breakers. It could be terrible or great.
      Also mildly curious about Passion.
      Boxing Day is also Bernard Rose, so mildly curious about that too.

      Then there’s Judge Dredd. WHICH IS NOT ALLOWED TO BE SHIT.

  25. Echo the Bunnyman says :

    what’s bxing day? I like Bernard Rose, but he doesn’t make enough movies for my taste.

    • Jarv says :

      It’s Rose back with Danny Huston again:

      Boxing Day, Alberto Barbera’s tale of a debt-laden businessman who leaves his family immediately after Christmas to pursue a lucrative property deal, reunites Bernard Rose and Danny Huston for a third time following Ivansxtc and The Kreutzer Sonata

  26. Droid says :

    Man, this is a good cast.

    Robert Redford-directed The Company You Keep.

    The film stars Redford, Shia LeBeouf, Julie Christie, Sam Elliott, Brendan Gleeson, Terence Howard, Richard Jenkins, Anna Kendrick, Brit Marling, Stanley Tucci, Nick Nolte, Chris Cooper, and Susan Sarandon.

    The film is a thriller centered on a former Weather Underground activist who goes on the run from a journalist who has discovered his identity.

    • Droid says :

      This is also a pretty good cast. Not exactly the quality of the Redford flick, but decent nonetheless.

      Lone Survivor, the Peter Berg-directed adaptation of the Marcus Luttrell book, starring Mark Wahlberg, Taylor Kitsch, Ben Foster, Emile Hirsch and Eric Bana.

      Lone Survivor tells the harrowing story of how Luttrell and his Navy SEAL team members fought to stay alive after being ambushed in Afghanistan in 2005 by Taliban forces during a covert mission in the Hindu Kush mountain region, where the team went to kill a terrorist leader.

      • Jarv says :

        I wouldn’t necessarily call that good- Wahlberg is patchy, Kitsch ain’t great, Hirsch hasn’t made a film I remember that I like. Bana is good.

      • Droid says :

        I like Marky Mark, but yes he is patchy. Hirsch was good in Killer Joe and Kitsch ain’t great, but in a squarejawed soldier role could be fine. Bana is great. Foster can act. He can also overact horribly, so there’s that.

        I guess I’ll revise my statement and say “this could be a good cast”, since there’s potential if they all deliver.

    • Jarv says :

      Yeah, it is good. Incidentally, I woke up this morning to the Anna Karennina trailer. Now, while I don’t want to watch another adaptation of Tolstoy, I was impressed at the music they used.

      • Droid says :

        I saw a trailer for that a while back. Don’t remember it at all except for wondering why Wright had gone back to period drama’s starring the ironing board.

      • Jarv says :

        It’s got a Stoppard Script, which is almost enough to get me over that it’s a Tolstoy period drama. However, the presence of Holland (totally flat) in the cast makes me run away from it again.

      • Droid says :

        Stoppard. Responsible for the hideously overrated Shakespeare in Love. Not a selling point.

        Also, it’s got Jude Law and the douche from Kick Ass in it.

        No, I doubt I’ll see that one.

      • Jarv says :

        Stoppard- responsible for the brilliant Arcadia, Rosencrantz and Guildernstern are Dead, Jumpers, and Brazil.

        And Shakespeare in Love may be overrated, but I quite like that script. Or rather, I did at the time. Even if it is a bit jammed full of obscure references.

        Having said that, though, there’s no way I’m watching it. Too much douchiness by far.

      • Droid says :

        Does Rosencrantz work on the stage? Because it’s a terrible film. I presume it does because it’s so well regarded. I’m the guy who doesn’t like Brazil. Not seen, read, heard of the others.

      • Jarv says :

        Yes, it does. It’s basically waiting for godot, but with Hamlet characters and a lot funnier. I’ve not seen the film, but if you don’t like it, then I suggest you never, ever, ever watch WfG.

        Ah, it’s you that doesn’t like Brazil.

    • Xiphos0311 says :

      yeah great cast cast except for The Beef, Julie Christie, Terrence Howard, Anna Kendrick who is a non entity so far, Who the hell is Brit Marling? and Susan Saradon. On second thought…

      • Jarv says :

        Julie Christie? Harsh, she’s a good actress.

      • Droid says :

        I don’t feel strongly one way or the other about The Beef. Julie Christie is fine. Brit Marling was good in Another Earth. Sarandon is fine. Not a fan of Howard and Kendrick. So… Howard and Kendrick aside, yep, great cast.

      • Jarv says :

        Not a fan of Sarandon, frankly.

        Strauss has retired. Not a surprise.

      • Droid says :

        Sarandon is good in a few things. Durham. Lorenzo’s Oil. Dead Man Walking. Those are good performances. I wouldn’t call myself a fan, but she’s not a bad actress.

      • Jarv says :

        All years ago, though.

      • Droid says :

        Sure. How does that change the fact that she’s not a bad actress?

      • Droid says :

        For example, De Niro hasn’t had a decent performance since the 90’s. You wouldn’t call him a bad actor, would you?

      • Jarv says :

        I’d consider it nowadays.

      • Jarv says :

        Suppose so, and you could add client to that list as well.

      • Droid says :

        Good of him to go in the middle of his decline, as opposed to hanging on until he really embarrasses himself.

      • Jarv says :

        Better to end the pain, really.

        Trott moves to opener, Bell to 3, and then we need another kid from somewhere. Or Carberry.

        Tough call.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        Christie for being ancient is still an attractive woman that is her claim to fame as far as acting well not so much. I cant’ actually remember being good in anything good looking yes but as far as acting nada.

      • Droid says :

        She’s very good in Don’t Look Now.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        wasn’t like from 75 or something? that’s 37 years ago

      • Jarv says :

        With Sarandon, it’s not that I think she’s a bad actress, I don’t. In fact, at the moment, I think she’s arguably a better actress than Deniro is as an actor.

        There’s something about her presence and voice that puts me off. If that makes sense.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        So one good job from almost 40 years ago makes you a good actress? shouldn’t the standard be just a touch higher?

      • Jarv says :

        Hold on- to be fair to Christie:

        DLN, Dr. Zhivago, Karaoke, Mel’s Hamlet, Dragonheart, The Go-Between, McCabe and Mrs. Miller,

        All good to great performances, regardless of the quality of the film.

      • Droid says :

        I haven’t seen many films she’s in. One’s I have seen are…

        Don’t Look Now (1973) – Very good performance.
        Afterglow (1997) – Good performance.
        Shampoo (1975) – Bad performance, but an abysmal film where no one was good.

        Seen, but can’t remember…
        Hamlet, Dragonheart, HP3, Troy

        I’m not the best person to ask, but she’s regarded for performances in movies I haven’t seen like Doctor Zhivago, McCabe and Mrs Miller, and Away From Her.

        So yes, based on two out of three performances I’ve seen and remember, I consider her to be a “good” actress.

      • Jarv says :

        DLN- what droid said
        Afterglow- Good
        Shampoo- I think she’s good, and the film is OK
        Hamlet- She’s very good
        Dragonheart- Good
        The Go Between- Good
        McCabe- Excellent
        Dr. Zhivago- Brilliant, and I hate the film.

        I don’t think you can include HP3 and Troy, as she’s barely in either of them.

        Add in Far from the Madding Crowd, Away from her, and she’s good more often than not.

      • Droid says :

        Who’s she in Dragonheart? Thewlis’ mum?

        Yeah, HP3 and Troy are listed as cameo’s.

      • Droid says :


        How was she in Red Riding Hood?

      • Jarv says :

        Not really in it. Cameo, but to be honest, I can’t remember.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        I would say that yes nowadays De Niro is a bad actor and a pay check hog. I don’t blame him for that but the days of DeNiro from Goodfellas, The God Father and Cape Fear are gone never to return.

        He’s not alone in this and now HWood is basically hiring disposable “talent” like unfortunately Taylor Kitsch or whatever good looking broad is the go to actress.

      • Droid says :

        I wouldn’t call him a bad actor. I think he’s a great actor who doesn’t give a shit anymore and sleepwalks through paycheck roles.

        It’s an argument that is down to personal opinion, and I can see how your perspective can be supported.

        I just don’t think you “lose” the ability to act. You just lose interest and intent to deliver the best performance possible.

      • Jarv says :

        You just lose interest and intent to deliver the best performance possible

        But isn’t that a lot of what goes in to acting? If you don’t give a fuck, it comes across on screen, particularly someone like Deniro, who’s a method actor.

      • Droid says :

        Which is why I can see the other perspective being supported. It’s a fine line. Either way, he hasn’t delivered a good performance in 15 years.

        IMO he’s a good actor who has delivered mediocre or bad performances. A cricketer can be in bad form, but that may not mean he’s bad.

      • Jarv says :

        There comes a point in cricket though, which Strauss acknowledged, where you just aren’t going to get the good form back. That’s why he’s retired from everything.

        When you’re sitting on a track record of 15 years of shite, it starts to look like that isn’t just a rough period of form, and he’s now bad.

      • Xiphos0311 says :

        sure you lose talent when you don’t give a shit you don’t care about your “craft”. Plus as you get older your focus changes l your desires shift and your needs are different and so yes you do lose talent.

      • koutchboom says :

        Yeah Di Niro gave his best performance in a LONG LONG time with that Being Flynn movie. Solid work, also he was a much scarier taxi driver in it as well. Too bad we didn’t have a Brothers Weitz Oscar Off this year.

  27. Droid says :

    Looks like Paramount is pushing hard at a Jack Ryan series. They’ve got Branagh directing the new one, and starring as the villain. Pine as Ryan. Ironing Board as his girlfriend/wife. K-Cost as Ryans mentor. The plan is for a trilogy.

    Add to that, they’ve got immediate plans for Without Remorse, and want Tom Hardy to star as John Kelly, with Christopher McQuarrie to direct. K-Cost to feature as Kelly’s mentor.

    Be interesting to see how it works out. I like the Jack Ryan films.

  28. Droid says :

    Here’s one for Jarv.

    A commercial director named Adam Berg has been hired to direct a remake of Videodrome.

    Wait for the punchline…



    The remake is scripted by Ehren Kruger.

    When Kruger set it up at Universal, he planned to modernize the concept, infusing it with the possibilities of nano-technology and blow it up into a large-scale sci-fi action thriller.

    • Jarv says :

      Fuck me.

      That simply does not exist. Who is this Adam Berg cunt, and more importantly, which cunt keeps giving Kruger work?

      Not to mention that Vidoedrome is of its time. It’s absurd to remake it now- and wouldn’t work because of the internet.

      When Kruger set it up at Universal, he planned to modernize the concept, infusing it with the possibilities of nano-technology and blow it up into a large-scale sci-fi action thriller.

      I hate him.

      • Droid says :

        I know I ranted about him the other day, but it’s worth repeating. He could very well be the worst screenwriter in history.

      • Jarv says :

        He’s even worse than Goldsman. Which is going some.

        How can you misunderstand Videodrome so badly to pitch that?

      • Droid says :

        Why remake Videodrome at all? Why not write a “large-scale sci-fi action thriller” about “nano-technology”, if that’s what you want to do? Videodrome is hardly a household name.

      • Jarv says :

        Totally agree. It hasn’t exactly got cachet like that, and it’s pretty obvious that the fuckhead has taken all the videodrome bits out other than New Flesh.

  29. Jarv says :



    Hehehehehe. Not that anyone aside from me cares, but that’s an upset.

  30. Jarv says :

    I think Keith Lemon is going to go into profit. Boooo.

    Massive 0% rating at RT, and 13% approval from audiences. Fucking shite.

  31. Jarv says :

    Censorship part 2: sex set for tomorrow AM.

  32. Jarv says :

    Great news!

    Dredd has an 18 Certificate!


    The chance of awesome just grew significantly.

    • koutchboom says :

      Ugh lame, PG-13 is the new R. Anything rated R these days usually blows and is laughably lame aka CGI BLOOD RRRRAAAWWWW!!!!

      But still Dredd does look like the second best Dredd movie they will ever make. Heheheh I love that notion, I’d love to have heard how that conversation went.

      Guy playing Dredd – “So I can take off the helmet at some point right?”
      Financial People – “Um no, we may actually make some money the less people know you are in this.”

      • Jarv says :

        The thought of that does make me laugh:

        Urban “So, can I take the helmet off like Sly did?”

        Backers “No, nobody knows who you are anyway”

  33. koutchboom says :

    Oh yeah caught The Good Doctor tonight for your Xi, and despite how much you love Elvis DO NOT WASTE YOUR TIME! Granted your rule of Michael Pañini always being solid and never given enough screen time still holds true.

    It was funny that Droid’s idol was finally rocking Droid’s hairdo throughout the movie though..

  34. Jarv says :

    Today’s review will be A Dangerous Method. Yay. Or not.

    • Jarv says :


      That the German fashion house’s design looks identical – but for a subtle logo – to the highly practical but tell-tale bags that wrap around longnecks, packed lunches or doctors’ prescriptions is, we can only assume, a whimsical statement by the high fashion maven.


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