The Golden Changs 2011- The Film Awards. The Nominations are:
Break out the red carpet, dust down your party gear, crack open the booze, and score as many class A’s as you can, because it’s now time for 2011’s annual Golden Changs. This year’s is a bit late, as we had some difficulties with the producer (we wouldn’t let him put pre-0p transexual hookers on expenses) and the host (who quit because he’s best buddies with the producer) although I’m still hopeful we can get Don “Fat cunt” Murphy.
These awards, which are clearly worth more than Nicholas Cage’s wig designer makes in a year are slightly different to the best of that we do at the end of the year- in that we vote for them. I’ve collected the nominations from the various changbacks in the Rec room, so if you don’t see your chosen film on the list, well, tough. You had your chance. As is, I’ve only picked those with multiple nominations to try to make it interesting and cut down on everyone voting for their favourite option.
Eligibility? Films released between 8th October 2010 and 7th October 2011. That is all.
FILM OF THE YEAR
2010 Winner: Inception
Fuck’s sake. Transformer’s 3 has no business being anywhere near this.
Anyhow, here are the nominations:
A surprise this one. Droid raved about it, and in the end it was a clever, amusing, well conceived and realised animated western. Worth a nod, for sure.
Rise of the Planet of the Apes-
I reviewed this here, and if we did an award for trailer of the year, this one is nailed on because it took our interest from 0 to WOW! in no time at all. A real surprise and a film universally loved by us.
The only film of the year to receive multiple reviews from us. Droid did his look at it here. A men on a mission film done with no little élan, this really was another surprisingly good film.
Transformers 3: The shit title of the moon.
Crap film apparently, I don’t know because I’ve never seen it. Droid eviscerated it here. Fuck’s sake, guys.
Tree of Life
Another I’ve not seen, but it’s Malick and Jonah loved it. Critically adored, will this win out?
I’m ecstatic to see the late nod for this film from Echo. I personally think this is the best film of the year, and said as much here. It’s got no budget, so it’s weird to see it in the company of these other films, but this is the best horror film since The Descent.
The Chris Klein award for Male Acting Achievement.
2010 Winner: Woody Harrelson
At some point, I promise I’ll grow up and stop using this. However, much as I’d like to, the Nash (as it shall now be known) needs handing out. Last year Woody ruled with about 9 different top performances. This year, it’s much more close.
Three actors received multiple nods: Aaron Eckhart was good in Battle LA, James Franco frequently excellent, and Michael Shannon as the left field nod. It’s not been a great year for actors, really.
The Emma Stone-Zombieland Award for Female Acting
Last Year’s Winner: Emma Stone
A pretty good year for actresses, however, we were all unified in who we nominated. Me and Droid both put up one (Jacki Weaver in Animal Kingdom), and ALL of us bar Koutch gave the nod to the other (Natalie Portman in Black Swan). Which is a credit to her given the mediocre film the performance was in. Luckily, both Koutch and Echo gave Jessica Chastain a shout for her turn in Tree of Life. Finally a late flurry of calls for Saorise Ronan brings the numbers up to 4, even if we all know that Portman has it nailed down.
THE OUTLANDER AWARD
Last Year’s Winner: Centurion
Did your film get utterly fucked by idiotic distribution, because the world needed 900 screenings of some shit like Alice in Wonderland in 3D? Well, you’re in good company, and chances are we’ll have seen it and want to recognise it. This year has a few interesting ones with everyone nominating Attack the Block and Stake Land (reviewed by me here). As I need three, I’m going for The Innkeepers (reviewed by me here) which has seen its release in the US postponed until Christ knows when and looks unlikely to get a shot at all in the UK. Which is a pity, because it’s a good little ghost film.
The Underrated Film of the Year
Last Year’s Winner: The Rocket
Three films received multiple nods from us: Battle LA scores its second, due to the critical response in America (Xi posted an elegant riposte to those critics looking down at it here) and Conan The Barbarian deserves a shout for being ignored by all and sundry despite it being quite good. Well, I think so, anyhow and my pet rock does so too. Finally, an interesting call from Droid that I totally agree with, sees Seth Rogan’s Green Hornet receive a nod. This is a film that was hurt by 3D badly, and I think is going to age really well.
The Changian Film of the Year
Last Year’s Winner: Bitch Slap
We like the following things: Boobs, stabbery, explosions, midgets, lesbians, gratuitous violence, good soundtrack, boobs, and so forth. This category is for films that appeal to our somewhat eclectic taste rather than quality.
This year’s nods are the surprisingly good Fast 5, a film that we all expected to suck donkey balls, but turned out to be the best of the series, Attack the Block (which I’ve not seen) but is right in our demographic and Conan The Barbarian, which supplies the boob and stabbery quotient.
The Don Murphy Award for Cinematic Failure
Last Year’s Winner: Splice
This isn’t getting a poll this year. There is one film that failed on every conceivable level and we’ve roasted across the board. All of us, bar none hated it, so it’s not even up for public vote. This is despite Koutch’s best efforts to get Black Swan in, and my personal hatred for Insidious, Red Riding Hood and My Soul to Take, all of which are awful but look like solid gold compared to the winner. I’ll announce it with the rest of the results.
Right, get voting campers. I’m not doing the site one, because it was too much of a pain in the arse. Results at some point when I can find a host that doesn’t look like the strangely wax version of Billy Crystal.