Kloipy is Ravaged by Deadgirl

Deadgirl is a movie with a message and that message is as follows: If you are ever in the basement of an old abandoned mental hospital, find a weird rotting girl on a table who is breathing and has a bag over her head and tied down, please, do not fuck her. That my friends is the premise of this foray into Necrophillia called Deadgirl. This is a movie that tries so hard to have a meaning when all it stands to provide us with is shitty acting and watching a zombie get raped for an hour and a half. This movie is garbage of the worst kind, like packet of mayo; encased in a dog turd,  roasting in the hot Alabama sun. Frankie may have to endure The Butterfly Effect 3, but Frank at least I can say that you most likely won’t have to see someone buttfuck a corpse.

Corpse buttfucking aside; this movie is not only pointless, it serves to piss you off by pretty much saying that all men, given the chance would rape a zombie if at all possible because we are ruled only by the smaller head. I’m sorry but I don’t think this is a fair assesment of mankind. Sure you got some sick fucks out there, I’m looking at you ghost of Ted Bundy, but for the most part most of the male population would not think this couth. I also don’t buy the idea that I think this movie is trying to get at that men think of most women as the ‘deadgirl’ in the way that women are seen as only a place to leave your DNA. That is bullshit. Real men treat women with dignity and respect, we don’t go all reverse reanimator on them.

The movie starts out with two of the most annoying characters in film history. Ricky and JT. Ricky looks like he just stepped out of Robert Smith’s asshole and JT looks kinda like Sam Rockwell doing his impersonation of Gary Oldman *wink wink*. They go to the aforementioned abanadoned mental institute and find the Deadgirl. They talk about letting her go but then just leave. Apparently JT just couldn’t hold back so he goes back that night and beats the shit out of her while he has his way with her. Talking Ricky back into going to see her, he shows him by shooting her that she can’t die. Ricky, to his credit, doesn’t want any part of this but then yet keeps going back once it is established that JT can’t stop. He’s got necro-fever! Soon their other friend ‘Wheeler’ gets invited to join in on the shenanigans and Ricky yells at them and yet doesn’t do a damn thing about it. Way to go Ricky, taking the passive stance against corpse buggery. But Ricky has other things on his mind like getting together with the most popular jocks girlfriend. Yeah Ricky, I’m sure she’ll love your crow-centric poetry and won’t mind listening to hours of Bauhaus.

a face that screams 'PUNCH ME'

After Ricky gets his ass handed to him by the jock, Wheeler lets it slip about the deadgirl, so the jocks stuff them in the trunk and force them to show them what Wheeler called ‘their sex slave’. For no reason the jocks start getting turning on by the deadgirl and pretty soon, Ricky’s mortal enemy is getting a hummer which turns into an orchestra of teeth chomping. The next day the jock starts to stink and has a bruise on his chest and a powerful case of the runs. In what turned into a very WTF moment, the jock shits his intestines out, which is I guess how you become a zombie, but he doesn’t come back and the movie just kind of leaves it at the prolapsed intestine. JT and Wheeler, not being satisfied with one deadgirl seek out to make another. They stalk women outside of a gas station at night in hopes of tricking them into getting zombified. Here’s another of this movies weaknesses. Anytime they try to create tension, for some reason incredibly dumb shit happens. They pick a woman and trick her by saying they have pot, so Wheeler hits her over the head with a tire iron. She stands there for a moment and blood pours down her head. Instead of collapsing or dying, she then kicks the shit out of them and then just leaves. She’s right there at a gas station, she has a head wound from some kids trying to kill her, and she just says ‘fuck it, Greys is on in 10″?  And another scene like this is when Ricky gets pissed and goes on a rampage in his room. By that I mean that he gently taps his bedpost with a baseball bat and huffs and puffs like a certain Fairy Tale lupin.

JT gets the idea to take Ricky’s girl to be the new member of the family and Ricky has had enough. JT tries to convince him that she will never love him on the outside but down in rape basement he can be her king. Ricky does what looks like the noble thing and frees her and Deadgirl, who kills Wheeler and bites JT’s lip off before running off into the wild to go do deadgirl things. But what’s this? Ricky’s dream girl got stabbed by JT and dies in Ricky’s arms. I thought it was over but we cut to what seems like a passage of time. Ricky is now wearing polos and seemingly very happy regardless of the fact that his two friends are dead and missing and no one seems to care or notice. But then, betraying the character that was built the entire movie, we see Ricky walking back to the mental hospital and we see his Dream Girl tied to the table in the basement where her eyes open and it fades to black. I thought she got stabbed? She wasn’t bit, so how the fuck did she come back to life? The movie just is full of questions like this. Other questions include: Why am I watching this shit?

The person I feel the worst for is the actress who played the deadgirl. She is naked the whole movie and has to have these putrid kids pretend to rape her. If this is your first film hopefully your career can only go up. Don’t listen to any of the hype about this movie. It is what happens when people get an idea and then have no idea how to execute it and just randomly throw ‘shocking’ images on the screen. I wish that someone would tell these filmakers that we aren’t all Harry Knowles and most of us don’t have time for this kind of trash. Godspeed Deadgirl.

Tags: , , , , , ,

About kloipy

a poor deluded sap hoping to find his place in this mixed up crazy world

102 responses to “Kloipy is Ravaged by Deadgirl”

  1. Jarv says :

    Fuck me Kloipy,

    This has to be a contender for most obnoxious film that any of us have watched.

    Is it worse than All about Steve?

  2. Continentalop says :

    Jesus Kloipy, why do you subject yourself to crap like this? Of course, better you than me.

    Personally, I’ve had some girls who were dead fucks, but I’ve never fucked a dead girl.

    And has anyone seen the movie Dead Girl by the woman who directed Blue Car?

    • kloipy says :

      Conti- It popped up on the Netflix instant cue. i had read a few reviews and I just wanted to see what the fuck this movie had, hoping perhaps it could use the idea in a way that made it, i don’t know, at least plausible, but no. Think I’ll be watching some actual good films for a bit. One can only take so much crap like this

  3. Droid says :

    I’ve never heard of this movie, and before I even read your review I knew that it would be complete and utter shit. Wanna know how I knew?

    “Brilliant” – Aint It Cool News

    What were you thinking kloipy?

  4. Franklin Thomas Marmoset says :

    A long time ago I saw that German film Nekromantik, which was about a guy who likes sex with dead people, and for some reason he steals a male corpse and has a three way with it and his girlfriend. If I remember correctly, in the end his girlfriend leaves him and runs off with the corpse.

    Anyway, that is a roundabout way of saying I have seen one film about corpse fucking and that was more than enough for me. So I probably won’t be watching this one.

    Thanks for the warning, Kloipy.

  5. Echo the Bunnyman says :

    I remember this as the movie Harry loved when he hated Make Out With Violence, an indie horror with another girl who comes back from the dead. That movie, by the Deagol brothers, wasnt about corpse shagging, but was kind of like John Hughes meets Tarkovsky, a strange combination but a better, more challenging movie than certainly this. I saw 10-15 miutes of this and changed my rule about watching mopvies–I no longer remotely feel the need to stick with garbage. I just turn it off now. Lifes too short. That being said, good review Kloipy, and a free lolly for sticking with it to the end.

    AICN has lost any small sense of taste it ever had, so I agree with Droid. if it says ‘brilliant’ there’s a great chance it’s vile or pretentious (or both) crap.

    • kloipy says :

      I think AICN is just dedicated to saying “Look at how twisted we are, we LOVE this stuff. The more depraved the better”. I was listening to a podcast on Spill.com the other day and they had gone to Fantastic Fest and were talking about how crude the bumpers were, they weren’t talking it up, so I checked them out and even I was offended by their contant. And the worst one involving things I won’t mention here was made by some of the AICN guys and was tweeted by Quint. They are like children, I mean I watched this piece of shit but I’m not going around saying how ‘brilliant’ it is. Let alone the love they all seem to have for A Serbian Film just begs the question, why?

  6. just pillow talk says :

    Shit, I remember hearing about this movie. Ain’t no fucking way I would ever watch this. Fucking horrible sick shit.

    “running off into the wild to go do deadgirl things.”
    That made me laugh.

    • kloipy says :

      Pillow, I like to imagine a Deadgirl Preserve out there where all the deadgirls are able to feed from peanut butter pinecones and frolic in sheet metal infested hills and dales

      • just pillow talk says :

        If that were true, I would imagine we would have these deer over-population problems.

        “Deadgirls released into wild in northwest Connecticut today, to combat the encroachment by the deer population. Local authorities assure the neighboring towns that they are harmless and may just want to nibble on your pet dog Sweetie.”

      • kloipy says :

        in winter you lose a lot of the deadgirls to starvation.

  7. koutchboom says :

    Hahahah SHIT Kloipy I’ve been meaning to watch this for forever now. Even I couldn’t get my head around actually viewing this….and I saw Serbian Film. Well looks like someone else took one for the team for once.

  8. kloipy says :

    Luckily most of the CF goes on in the background and isn’t overly explicit, still after seeing it, no reason for this movie

  9. Franklin Thomas Marmoset says :

    I’ve heard Nekromantik is the BEST! corpse shagging movie?

    If you haven’t seen it, I think this is a great opportunity for a reviewing challenge. And the best part is there is also a Nekromantik 2, so you can make it a two-parter.

    What do you think, Koutch? Are you up for watching and reviewing Nekromantik parts 1 and 2?

    You can say no if you like, but obviously I’ll assume that means you’re a pussy. 😉

    • koutchboom says :

      Naw just means I can’t find a copy of it 😦 already tried.

      • Franklin Thomas Marmoset says :

        The first one is available on Stagevu, and it took me thirty seconds to find a Megaupload link for part 2.

        I suspect there is pussyness afoot!

      • koutchboom says :

        Naw I just don’t use those sites. BT junkie or nothing else. I don’t have time to waste going all over the internet dealing with sites I don’t trust. Also I’m at work and won’t look for that stuff right now and will probably forget by the time I get home. E-mail a link to the site and I’ll check it out.

      • kloipy says :

        Yeah Koutch you watched someone get skull fucked to death, I’m sure you can handle Nekromantic!

      • koutchboom says :

        How about we turn this into a series? Whose going to do Kissed? A little REVERSE necrophilia, dead boy live girl sort of thing.

        We’ll let Droid handle Clerks since we know he’s too big a pussy for anything else.

      • kloipy says :

        Koutch, you can take Aftermath

      • Droid says :

        Koutch, you mistake “pussy” for “sensible person who doesn’t want to waste his time watching complete and utter shit made by cunts that only cunts will enjoy”.

      • koutchboom says :

        Yeah that sounds like the definition of pussy to me. Man up for once, come on aren’t Aussie’s suppose to be tough? I know you’ve denounced your heritage long ago but maybe there’s an ounce of outback steakhouse still left in you.

      • Droid says :

        This is where we differ, Koutch. See, in my opinion, you’re actually more of a pussy by doing the kind of things you do to get attention and trying to be as controversial as possible. It’s why your A Serbian Film thing went over as well as it did. It actually takes a real man to make an independent decision, one based on his own opinions and instead of constantly trying to be the class clown.

        But you won’t actually understand that rationale, so I’ll expect some sort of gay slur, or maybe another random photo that’s unrelated to anything in particular, because that’s all you seem to be capable of.

      • koutchboom says :

        Awww boo hoo. Did you stop to think that I possibly wanted to watch the film? Why not? Its not like it’s going to effect my sensibilities at all.

        I just say you are a pussy because you watch like no films. Have you ever seen a Saw/Hostel/Serbian Film? Maybe you are worried you will enjoy them too much? Plus we all think its funny to one up each other in watching some stupid fucking gross flick, be a man and join in from time to time. I could understand if it was me just doing it. But we all are. It’s a fun thing to do on this site. So act all high and mighty like OHHH I think for myself. But we are all here to clown around and have fun. It would be funny to read your reaction to some sick film. I mean kloipy just put up a review for Dead Girl…..Jarv did Thundercunt…fucking Frankie did the Butterfly Effect series….I’ll do this one film if I can get a copy of it without too much hassle. You say I’m just being the class clown I’m just joining in on the fun. You should try it sometime rather then sit around and talk about how funnier you think you are then everyone else.

        And I mean your REAL MAN independent decisions are just “I won’t watch anything rated 18. Unless it’s critically acclaimed then I’ll see it”. WOW you should run a company with such independent thought.

      • Droid says :

        Unlike you Koutch, I can make a decision based on rationale. I’ve seen Saw. Didn’t like it. By that rationale I won’t watch the sequels. I read about Hostel and decided that it was unworthy of my time. I’d rather watch something I’m interested in, rather than torture porn. Unlike you, I don’t base my own masculinity on how much utter shit I can watch. “Hey, I must be a real man because I watched A Serbian Film.” No, you watched A Serbian Film to get attention on a website. And it went down like a sack of bricks. I get it. You want to be seen as funny. A real character. But your desperation makes you come off as simply obnoxious a lot of the time.

        And let’s not forget that I took your advice on a film, and that film was The Collector. And we all know how that turned out.

      • koutchboom says :

        HEY! THE COLLECTOR! One of Droids funnier reviews!!! YEY!!!!

        Also if you took my fucking advice you’d be much more of a man now because you would’ve seen The Rocket. A movie I am going to fucking Clockwork Orange the lot of you into watching.

      • koutchboom says :

        As for Serbian film you are right it went over like blah. But I wanted to see it mainly just to see what all the hub bub was about, I mean isn’t that why we watch pretty much any movie? I only did the web site thing because it seemed like a good idea, but watching subtitiles and trying to say something funny to a pretty much useless film is a pretty worthless task. The only way to make it funny is to write a very positive review of it afterward lying the whole time.

        But like I said earlier. Just sit around on your throne of rationale…you watched fucking both Garfield movies for fucks sake? Thats worse in my book then any TP movie. Sooooooooooooooooooo yey I don’t really get your point? You think your better then everyone here, gone on you mate. Thanks for letting us know, now move on and fucking watch Kissed like a real man not a pussy.

      • Droid says :

        No, I never said that I am better than anyone here. Thats either you being obnoxiously stupid or you’re simply putting words in my mouth.

        Yep, I’ve seen both Garfield movies. I’ll repeat my reasons if they make you feel better about it. Saw the first one because I loved the comic strip as a kid. Saw the second one because it was on tv and I was gloriously hungover. I wouldn’t describe it as “watched”, more “stared at”.

        But let’s not get too crazy about pointing fingers at viewing habits. You seem to watch nothing but total shit. And the shitter it is, the more excitable you get. But that’s your opinion, and I couldn’t really give a shit what you watch and what you like.

      • koutchboom says :

        Well then why are you on here? Do you not enjoy it when one of us watches something totally stupid or gross? I love that aspect.

        I watch anything, thats my thing. I don’t really care what I watch. Sure I stay away from some things because I think they’ll be boring. I seek out tons of different stuff just so I can learn more about film. You make it seem like all I do is watch the Saw series over and over again. Right now I’ve got a mumblecore movie lined up, JFK still, The Runaways (off of Xi’s recomendation) and now this Necromatic series. I just watch tons of different shit.

      • Droid says :

        I’m “on here” because I enjoy discussing films and well, all kinds of shit. What I’m not on here for is to have some douchebag call me a “pussy” because I’m self aware enough to know that I don’t want to watch a film where a bloke fucks a corpse.

        Yes, you watch lots of different movies. But the ones you get excited over are, in my opinion, nearly always shit that I have no interest at all in.

      • Franklin Thomas Marmoset says :

        I don’t much want to get in the middle here, but I will say I agree 100% with this comment:

        its funny to one up each other in watching some stupid fucking gross flick

        I’m not sure why it’s funny, but it is. It was funny when Conti made me watch Last House On Dead End Street, it was hilarious when Conti made Jarv watch Thundercrack, and it would be really funny if Koutch watched both Nekromantik films.

        You can dooo eeet, Koutch! Don’t pussy out!

      • koutchboom says :

        I will if you tell me that one site is safe. Is it safe? IS IT SAFE!!!

      • Droid says :

        I do plan on watching the rocket at some stage.

      • koutchboom says :

        Good maybe then you’ll understand everything. Also I didn’t HARD sell The Collector. It was more for people already interested in it. I AM hard selling The Rocket, because its a movie I know most of you will like. Also it’s pretty obvious that it’s not TP, but it is pretty brutal at times.

      • Droid says :

        The Collector was easily TP. The film was structured around varying types of torture. The “story” was secondary.

      • koutchboom says :

        Yeah I know I was talking about The Rocket? Maybe if you actually read what I write you’d understand it better.

      • Droid says :

        I assumed you were talking about The Collector because no ones ever said The Rocket was TP and it wasn’t funny so it couldn’t have been an attempt at a joke. My mistake obviously.

      • koutchboom says :

        I AM hard selling The Rocket, because its a movie I know most of you will like. Also it’s pretty obvious that it’s not TP, but it is pretty brutal at times.


      • Droid says :

        There is a disconnect here that you can’t seem to grasp. Those two sentences have nothing to do with each other. But I now understand that it was an attempt at a joke. Can I just give you a “HAHA” so you can move on?

      • koutchboom says :

        How is there a disconnect? I bring up the Rocket, and in the next sentence I’m still talking about The Rocket?

      • Franklin Thomas Marmoset says :

        Stagevu is perfectly safe. I’ve used it dozens of times and never had a problem. It’s actually a pretty good source for B movies and the like.

        As for Megaupload, it’s up to you to decide whether you want to risk it. I download stuff from there all the time – mostly telly, almost all of which I get from there these days – and have gotten precisely zero viruses.

        Here’s the link for Nekromantik:


        I’m not 100% sure this will work, but here’s a link for Nekromantik 2:


        If it doesn’t work, just go to http://www.filestube.com and search for the film by name.

      • koutchboom says :

        Cool, thank you. Odd your comment popped up needing approval? I guess it does that when you put in a certain number of links to shit.

      • kloipy says :

        and let’s please not bring up the question of why someone is ‘on here’. Droids been here at WOTM longer than I have, he has as much right to be here and post as the rest of us. Just because he may not want to watch some of what others of us do doesn’t mean anything. He’s here because it’s a site for us to keep in contact with each other, make each other laugh, and various other reasons.

      • Droid says :

        kloipy, sorry if this shit is pissing you off. I’m done with this conversation now. Sorry to stuff up your review TB as well.

      • kloipy says :

        thanks Droid, I would just rather not have my most comments on a review become just all fighting and shit. Let’s stick to the issue at hand: Corpse Fucking
        a joke

  10. kloipy says :

    Goddamit guys. I don’t want to piss on the parade, but seriously let’s not get into this shit. Koutch I don’t know if you wanted to joke by calling droid a pussy but his response was valid. Let’s not get into an argument about what makes us a ‘real man’ in some kind of film watching dick measuring contest. If Droid doesn’t want to subject himself to this shit that’s totally fine, probably better off not to fill your brain with this I’ll be the first to admit. You guys need to just drop this shit.
    Let’s all just make up right now, and get back to what we do best, bullshitting about everything.
    alright? Peace and stuff.

    • koutchboom says :

      Naw this all steams from Droid thinks his shit doesn’t stink shit like always. I made a joke about the shittyness of Zemeckis’ CGI (because I thought Jarv was here and would agree and get a laugh out of it). And Droid just wanted to prove he’s the king of comedy and made his 500th KFC joke. I wasn’t even knocking Droid, but of course he being the independent thinker that he is thought I was.

      • kloipy says :

        Look man, I understand that we are all different people and just like anybody we will get into some sort of argument at some point but it seems to me that it’s like an almost everyday thing now and that shit needs to end soon. It’s one thing to poke sometimes but it’s getting to the point where the jokes are barbed and that is not good. I hate being the den mother here but let’s drop it before we have to deal with this shit for the rest of the day. I heart you guys and shit

      • Droid says :

        You got pretty worked up over a simple KFC gag. Is it because you really enjoy it? I can think of no real explanation for getting so wound up.

      • Franklin Thomas Marmoset says :

        Kloipy’s right, this bickering is getting more and more tedious.

        I’m sorry if I stirred things up, my intention was just to have a little fun and maybe get Koutch to watch two horrible films about corpse fuckery, but things seem to have gotten out of hand.

        We’re all friends here – I’ve been chatting with some of you for nearly four years now – and I don’t see any reason why we can’t just have a few laughs, talk about films and whatnot, and leave all this squabbling behind.

      • kloipy says :

        amen Frank

    • Tom_Bando says :

      As for me—not thanks, I bail on all these sorts of movies. Just Not For Me, thank you.

      I DID however enjoy the Directors Cut of A*P*E*—weeble dolls, bursting bloodpacks and Toy Cows are the stuff of legends.

  11. Droid says :

    Well, moving on. Speaking of disturbing movie experiences, I watched Ghosts of the Civil Dead last night. This is John Hillcoats first film, and if you’ve seen The Proposition, you know how enamoured he is with unrelenting misery. Well, GOTCD is even moreso. Set in a maximum security prison, it basically documents the gradual destruction of the prisoners. Step by step taking away their civil liberties until they mentally self destruct. It’s not very gory (one brutal stabbing scene) but it’s a pretty hard watch because of it’s so uncomfortably grim. Anyone else seen it?

    • kloipy says :

      I’ve never heard of it Droid. He did the movie of The Road didn’t he? That movie, albiet not as good as the book, was still extremely depressing

      • koutchboom says :

        That Red Dead Redemtion shit he did fucking blew.

      • Droid says :

        I didn’t see it, but from what I understand all it was was edited together cut scenes from the game. Pretty pointless if you ask me. But hey, he probably got paid a shitload to do it.

      • Droid says :

        Yeah, he made The Road too. He has a thing for misery. The film (The Road) was never going to be as good as the book, and I think he pulled it off just about as well as he could have.

        I don’t think many have seen GOTCD. It’s not easy to find, which doesn’t help.

      • kloipy says :

        The Road was a great book and works much better in your head than it does on screen. It’s funny they actually filmed some of it close to where I live. The scene by the abanonded tunnel isn’t far from me. In PA we also have Centrailia which is what they kind of based Silent HIll on

      • Droid says :

        A mine fire since 1962? Crazy.

      • koutchboom says :

        The crazy thing about the road, is that scene with the washed up boat broken in half on the highway that looked pretty fake in the movie….they actually fucking did that. I saw it in some special effects magazine. Its funny how something practical do to all the color correcting afterward turned out to look like CGI. I wish I could find a picture of it online it’s kind of cool looking to just see it normally in daylight not all washed out yellow.

      • kloipy says :

        what’s crazier is the fact that about 20 people still live there and refuse to move

      • kloipy says :

        tried to find a picture of that Koutch, google image produces jack shit

      • Droid says :

        I haven’t seen Silent Hill. Is it any good?

      • koutchboom says :

        Silent Hill was pretty good. I caught the ass end of it the other day made me want to rent it and see the whole thing again. I need to watch Brotherhood of the Wolf again as well.

      • koutchboom says :

        Yeah Kloipy I can’t find shit either. It was in this magazine. I wish I had bought it. Its a pretty good magazine cool stuff you don’t see anywhere else.


      • Droid says :

        Brotherhood is good. I didn’t know that bloke directed SH. I guess I’ll add that to the list.

      • kloipy says :

        Droid, I hated Silent Hill, had a few neat looking scenes but the plot, wooden acting, and just poor execution didn’t do it for me. And terrible CGI

      • Droid says :

        Oh no! The WOTM score has dropped significantly from 100% to 50%

      • kloipy says :

        sorry to pull an Armond White on that silent hill thing…

      • koutchboom says :

        Yeah Silent Hill was kind of boring. I’d need to watch it all again to see how I feel about it. It’s an odd movie though. I liked the CGI, its on par with the Wolf monster from Brotherhood probably a little better. So if you didn’t like that then you probably won’t like the Silent Hill CGI.

  12. Tom_Bando says :

    Kloipy–this sounds like a Horribly bad movie, can’t imagine why you’d put yourself thru it. Now it’s TRUE, true-that I have been watching the complete DVD set of the second season of Riptide-and that’s not exactly great either-but still-

    You def. took one for the team here.

    Might I suggest some In Bruges/LA Confidential/The Third Man/X From Outer Space to soothe things over?

    • kloipy says :

      Bando- I love The third man, thanks for the suggestions. I’ve never seen In Bruges and unlike the rest of everyone, I have yet to see Master and Commander. SO mabye it is about time

      • Droid says :

        Damn, kloipy. Watch M&C this instant! It’ll change your life. Well, maybe not, but it’s genius.

      • koutchboom says :

        There is always The Rocket. Was it you that’s seen it? Or was that JPT?

      • Tom_Bando says :

        In Bruges is quite good, Colin Farrell is the best you’ve seen him, Master and Commander is great too. I would have to agree w/ Noted_Sage Droid on this one.

      • kloipy says :

        Yeah, I’ll put all these on the Netflix to see. M&C seems to be loved everywhere, hope I’m in that camp as well. I haven’t seen The Rocket, but I also want to see A Prophet

      • Droid says :

        A Prophet is great. See that, M&C and In Bruges and you’ll be a very happy kloipy.

      • kloipy says :

        yeah, I’ll let you guys know my thoughts after seeing them.

      • koutchboom says :

        Hrmmmmm i’d say see them in order for worst to best. Though niether of them suck really just so you end at the peak.

        In Bruges/A Prophet/The Rocket/M and C.

      • Tom_Bando says :

        Annnnnnnnnnd the X From Outer Space-c’mon, Kaiju Deely Bobbers! You gotta partake in it at least once in your lifetime young man.

      • kloipy says :

        Bando- I’m sure I’ve seen that one somewhere along the line. As a youngling I was addicted to monster movies so I’m sure it was in the cache somewhere along the line 🙂

      • Tom_Bando says :

        Kloipy am sure you did. It’s plotwise identical to any other Gamera/Godzilla thing you’ve ever seen, but it has a certain Something or Other to it that will make your eyes glaze over. (Plus a hull breach during reentry is fixed by some guy sticking his butt into it. It’s That sorta movie…)

      • just pillow talk says :

        Every single one of those movies is great.

        The Rocket

        Master & Commander

        In Bruges

        A Prophet

        If you watch all four of those in a row, it will cleanse your system and prepar it for more diabolically bad cinema.

  13. Franklin Thomas Marmoset says :

    Personally, I would recommend Silent Hill for the daftness of it, especially toward the end. It does have some pretty cool, creepy imagery here and there – not to mention a female copper who looks like she’s about whip out a CD player and launch into a striptease any second – but it’s mostly nonsense.

    Now I think about it, I might watch that one again…

    • kloipy says :

      Frankie, I would agree with you, it is terribly bad but insanely weird too. Just something I wasn’t expecting when I went into it.

  14. LB says :

    Yeah-Johnny come lately here-great review kloipy. The AICN tagline of doom-Yeah that was good year for old AICN-where they just went off the rails-Drew jumped shipped and so did all the good TBers.

    Luckily, Echo saved our collective butts.

    • kloipy says :

      Thanks LB! anytime I see AICN on a poster or trailer I just cringe. Yeah that site lost pretty much all credibility when Drew left. He was their best writer

      • Tom_Bando says :

        Drew’s a pompous ass at times, but you are right, he Was their best writer. And to be honest Hit Fix isn’t a bad site. It’s kinda USA Today-ish, but it has it’s good points. He was smart to get outta Harold-land and get into something that was, yes, Professional.

      • koutchboom says :

        God Hit flix is a nightmare though. Its such a shitty design and layout. Annoying. Don’t bother ever trying to post shit there. Mainly because no one reads it, but also because its an annoying pain in the ass.

  15. Tom_Bando says :

    Master and Commander is one of those that Screams out for being made into a series. Everything ELSE is, you know? c’mon Peter Weir. We know yew kin do it.

  16. Jarv says :

    Mother of god. What the fuck happened here?

    I blame the Pope entirely

  17. ThereWolf says :

    Christ in a Datsun, Kloipy. That sounds horrendous. Didn’t the synopsis worry you at all – I mean you still hit ‘play’!

    I don’t know what to queue first now… Deadgirl, Twilight or Step Up…

    • kloipy says :

      yeah Wolf, it was one of those moments of weakness where I just let all the talk of it take over and I wanted to see I guess what all the fuss was about. I think even with the premise an interesting film could have been made, but alas not so.
      twilight is kinda like dead girl in the fact that the lead wants to have sex with a dead person against his will

      • ThereWolf says :

        Actually, you’ve not completely put me off Deadgirl. I like to test myself every once in awhile – that one sounds like a trial. Unfortunately (or fortunately), Lovefilm haven’t got it for rental – yet…

        Twilight, etc… being kinda ironic there.

        Sorry I’m late responding to this ‘un – my internet was fucked for 4 days…

      • kloipy says :

        don’t worry about it Wolf, i know all too well about internet fuckage.

      • kloipy says :

        but honestly this is really not as disgusting as it could have been, it’s just really dumb and horribly written.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: