Droid defines the decades best movies – Twenty Close Calls!

man running from hippo title

hehe I’m not exactly sure what that pics supposed to signify, but who cares!? It makes me chuckle.  If I was that bloke I’d be running hell for leather.  Anyway, as I’m working on my Top 20 reviews I have also put together a list of flicks that came under consideration, but missed out by the hair on their respective chinny chin chins.  These are all very good movies (if somewhat depressing! I promise the Top 20 isn’t as depressing as these), and when you put them all together like this, it makes me think that maybe it hasn’t been the complete load of shit decade I thought it had.  So for your probable repulsion and heated argument, here are my Twenty Close Calls.


The Three Burials of Melquiades Estrada (2005)

the-three-burials-mel-estrada In the right role, Tommy Lee Jones kicks ass. This is my favourite performance of his besides ‘The Fugitive’. When rancher Pete Perkins discovers the killer of his friend Melquiades, he tracks down the killer and kidnaps him, setting out for Mexico with the dead body and killer in tow, determined to give his friend a proper burial. Barry Pepper, as the border patrolman who mistakenly kills Melquiades and tries to cover his tracks is brilliant. Directed by Jones, this is a brutal, harrowing tale of vengeance and redemption.


The Proposition (2005)

proposition This Australian western proves we can match it with the big boys when it comes to brutal tales set in desolate landscapes. Written by Nick Cave and directed by John Hillcoat, starring a whole bunch of great actors, this is as horrifying and depressing as it gets. But in a good way. Every person in this flick is so covered with sweat, dirt and grime, you feel like you need a shower afterwards. Compelling stuff.


Undertow (2004)

undertow poster When his wife died, John moved his two sons, Chris and Tim, to the middle of nowhere in the American south. One day Johns brother Deel shows up, fresh out of prison and looking to settle old scores and collect his share of their fathers inheritance. As you can imagine it all goes horribly wrong. This is the first time I saw Jamie Bell since he was a little kid hot shoe shuffling while his teary eyed miner father screamed “Just let him dance!” in ‘Billy Elliot’, and he surprised me with how good he was. But the even bigger surprise was Josh Lucas as Deel. I’d only known him from crappy romantic comedies or getting thrown about by a giant green bloke, but here he is brilliant. Director David Gordon Green’s got a unique style, using freeze frames and even inverting the negative. This was in my Top 20. Upon re-watching it, it’s dropped out. It’s still very, very good though.


Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban (2004)

harry_potter_and_the_prisoner_of_azkaban_ver10 This is the only Harry Potter I can honestly say I thought was good. And it’s very good. After the shambolic first two, Chris Columbus called it quits and in came Alfonso Cuarón. Thank christ for that. What he brings in here is atmosphere, style and a sense of danger. The first two were the books spewed onto the screen without any thought towards making them remotely cinematic. Here, Cuarón isn’t bound by slavish dedication to the book and a lot of the garbage is stripped away. Dumbledore takes a back seat (partly due to the fact that Richard Harris died and was replaced by Michael Gambon) and the increasingly boring Quidditch match was thankfully brief. The young actors are noticeably better, and Gary Oldman is great. I was so involved in this one, that at the end when Harry does the Patronus spell I was honestly thrilled. No other Potter flick has even come close to this one.


Team America: World Police (2004)

team_america_world_police Fuck yeah! This is as good as anything Trey Parker and Matt Stone have done. Hilarious satire and the usual potty mouthed humour combine for a ridiculously good time. The sign of any great comedy, it’s very, very quotable. “You’re breakin’ my balls, Hans! You’re breakin’ my balls!” And what’s even funnier is Parker and Stone aren’t afraid to take shots at anyone. This pissed a lot of self-important twats off. And that dick/pussy/asshole speech is about as perfectly written as you can get. Genius.


The New World (2005)

new_world It’s so good to have Terence Mallick back making movies. This is another gorgeously filmed flick, and a riveting take on the “real” story of Pocahontas and John Smith. Colin Farrell and Christian Bale are terrific and Q’Orianka Kilcher as Pocahontas is beautiful. Although it’s a bit unsettling that she was only 14 when they made this. I never realised what a sad story this is until I watched this movie.


The Bourne Identity (2002)

bourne_identity_ver2 Matt Damon as an action hero? Who’d have guessed? But this loose adaptation of the Robert Ludlum novel about a spy with amnesia trying to put the pieces together, is terrific. Unlike the turgid rectal flotsam that came after, the original is brilliantly paced, fun and you’re actually interested in finding out who this guy is. Clive Owen turns up briefly as one of the rival Treadstone operatives and has one of the best death lines I can remember in a flick. Doug Liman was on a role after ‘Swingers’, ‘Go’ and then this. What happened!?


Children of Men (2006)

children_of_men_ver2 Alfonso Cuarón again in this much reworked adaptation of the P. D. James novel. It’s a dystopian future tale where humanity has lost the ability to reproduce. When it’s discovered that one woman is pregnant, human survival depends one bloke getting this woman to safety. A brilliant flick filled with terrific performances, and I know everyone craps on about it, but that one shot towards the end is absolutely amazing. If it was edited anywhere, I couldn’t tell. Cuarón needs to make more films.


Let The Right One In (2008)

let_the_right_one_in_poster This bleak and depressing flick captivated me when I saw it. I’d heard the hype, and expected to be disappointed. I wasn’t. If this was an American flick about the tender friendship between a young boy and girl, you’d expect a treacly shitfest starring one of the Culkin clan. But this is made by disturbed Swedish folk, and the girl in question is a centuries old vampire. The friendship is oddly touching in an unsettling way, and for some reason it works.


Knowing (2009)

knowing_poster The hairpiece is great in this terrific thriller directed by Alex Proyas. It’s complete mumbo jumbo bollocks from start to finish, but immensely gripping and enjoyable. This flick takes no prisoners. The cliché “expect the unexpected” pretty much sums this up for me. I purposely knew very little about it, and loved every second of it. The two set pieces are brilliantly staged and the divisive ending is a complete kick in the guts. Brilliant.


Almost Famous (2000)

almost_famous_ver2 This would be farcically unbelievable if it weren’t based on truth. Writer/Director Cameron Crowe actually did start writing for Rolling Stone at the age of 15. His story follows the Crowe surrogate William as he tours with fictional band Stillwater, loses his virginity, falls in love and generally learns about life. Filled with great performances, among them Patrick Fugit, Frances McDormand, Billy Crudup and Philip Seymour Hoffman, this inside (somewhat glossy) story of a rock n’ roll band is effortlessly entertaining. Check out the special edition DVD which includes a deleted scene (taken from Crowe’s real life) where he uses Led Zep’s ‘Stairway to Heaven’ to convince his mum to let him go. It’s not included in the finished flick because they couldn’t afford the rights to the song, and on the DVD Crowe actually introduces the scene and tells you when to press play on your version (you have to play the song separately). The acting as they sit and listen to the whole song is amazing work. Check it out if you get the chance.


Igby Goes Down (2002)

igby This is probably as close as we are going to get to an adaptation of ‘Catcher in the Rye’. The one decent Culkin, Kieren is fantastic as Igby, a 17 year old rebelling against pretty much anything. Bill Pullman, Jeff Goldblum and Susan Sarandon are all terrific and it’s one of the few “coming of age” films I can handle. It’s largely unsentimental approach is completely refreshing.


The Devils Backbone (2001)

devils backbone I know most will prefer ‘Pans Labyrinth’, and there’s a case to be made for those claims, but for me this just edges it out. A good old fashioned ghost tale, set in an orphanage in Spain during the Civil War, the sense of creepiness slowly builds as the mystery unfolds. The cinematography is stunning, and the acting by the kid especially is superb. This is my favourite Del Toro flick.


The Way of the Gun (2000)

way of the gun After the success of ‘The Usual Suspects’, Christopher McQuarrie made megabucks doing rewrites for flicks like X-Men, or working for Scorsese on an Alexander the Great movie that never saw the light of day (thanks Oliver). After a few stalled attempts at directing (one was a big budget scifi that he’d written), he turned back to crime. And this is what he came up with. Maybe a touch overly complicated, but a very confident and cool flick nonetheless. I hated Ryan Phillipe before this. But he’s great in it, as is Benicio Del Toro. Sometimes the pleasure is in the details, and in TWOTG it’s the things like the authentic way the actors hold their guns and the lurid, hard boiled dialogue that sets this apart from the usual post-Tarantino knock offs. And the chase scene. One of the most unique car chases ever put on film. Terrific.


There Will Be Blood (2007)

there_will_be_blood_ver2 Daniel Day Lewis is the best actor going around. He blew me away as Bill the Butcher, but this Oscar winning performance is amazing. Paul Thomas Andersons depressing tale of one man’s insatiable greed and loathing is about as good as they get. Paul Dano and Kevin J. O’Connor are also superb. My god, that ending is bleak. Beaten to death with a bowling pin. What a way to go. "I drink your milkshake, I drink it up." What an absolute prick.


Wonder Boys (2000)

wonder_boys_ver4 Proof that Michael Douglas can act when he’s not trying to nail anything that moves, this flick, based on the book by Michael Chabon, and directed by Curtis Hanson, centres around a literary professor and novelist with writers block. Brilliant writing and wonderful acting sets this apart from the usual mid-life crisis type flick. It’s very funny, and much more entertaining than I anticipated.


Frailty (2001)

frailty Yet another depressing flick, but a fantastic debut from Bill Paxton. About a father of two young boys who believes he has been chosen by God to rid the world of demons, this is an incredibly intense and horrifying thriller. Paxton is amazing, as are Matt O’Leary and Jeremy Sumpter as his two kids. So very disturbing. I haven’t seen this since it first came out and I still have the image of Paxton wielding the axe in my head.


Batman Begins (2005)

batman_begins Christopher Nolan kickstarts the stalled Batman series with this great origin story. Many will argue that the ‘The Dark Knight’ is the better film, but for me this is superior. The success of TDK was well deserved, but was largely due to the amazing performance by Heath Ledger. ‘Begins’ firmly places Bruce Wayne front and centre as piece by piece he gathers the tools to become Batman. The villians are effective but don’t detract from his story. An enthralling start to what hopefully will continue to be a terrific series of films.


Memento (2000)

memento The flick that made Christopher Nolan, this unique flick about a man with anterograde amnesia searching for his wife’s murderer is about as well constructed as you get. Guy Pearce follows up a brilliant performance in ‘LA Confidential’ with one that may be even better. Joey Pants is great as his weasely sidekick who probably knows more than he’s letting on, but the real star of this movie is the writing and directing. This could’ve been a complete disaster. But thanks to Jonathan and Christopher Nolan, it’s never confusing. And one of the few films that’s better the second time you watch it.


Hulk (2003)

Hulk-Poster-001 I can hear the groans from here, but this is 80% of a perfect superhero flick. If it didn’t go belly up in the last 20 minutes, it would be a masterpiece and be in my Top 10. Alas it is not to be, but there is still lots to like. You can almost see the flies buzzing around Nick Nolte as he lets loose with his unhinged performance as the unwashed nutcase David Banner. Eric Bana and Sam Elliott are both great and some of the action scenes are brilliantly staged. Some actual thought’s gone into the character and it asks more from the audience than idiotic sound and fury. Unlike the braindead remake which got as far as “You won’t like me when I’m horny” and gave up in order to smash stuff up real good.



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About Judge Droid

In between refining my procrastination skills I talk a lot of shit about movies and such.

100 responses to “Droid defines the decades best movies – Twenty Close Calls!”

  1. Tom_Bando says :

    I enjoyed Hulk One–but have to admit just preferring the second that much better. It felt like a Hulk flick, ya know? Memento didn’t do much for me, Knowing is okay not great, hmmmm Bourne I I do enjoy, and ditto the Third Harold Potter flick (izzat the one where they are watching themselves? w/ the big spiders?) sure. Bats Begins I liked OK but it’s not really for me. Oh and Almost Famous was kind fun, too.

  2. xiphos0311 says :

    The point of the Hippo picture is that those ungainly fucks are just about the most dangerous animal on the African Continent. No shit, the only thing worse are insects.

    Now about the list, Batman Begins? Okaaaaaaaaay it’s YOUR list. I will stipulate for the record that Slave Labor Hulk is shit loads better then BB but that really isn’t saying anything Slave Labor Hulk sucked like a Black hole about to implode. And now begins the endless argument.

    I can’t believe I forgot about Way of the Gun for my list. Oh well, to late now, it’s a great movie and one of the most consistently overlooked noir crime movies out there; and one of the few to use fire arms correctly and believably. The low speed chase is one of the top chases ever put to film equally as great as Bullit, the French Connection or Ronin

    • Droid says :

      I think I was going for the whole close call thing with that pic. And I just found it funny.

      BB is great. Hulk is great. And this arguments been done to death.

      Way of the Gun is bloody good.

    • Jarv says :

      Just behind Elephants, if I remember right, as the most dangerous.

      • koutchboom says :

        Elephants kill the most humans, but Hippos are the most aggressive animals. Plus they fling their shit when they poo. BUT come on how cute is a pigmy hippo?

        Looks like a baby Droid.

  3. Droid says :

    Also, the thing that makes that pic even funnier is the shell oil sign! ha! Man I’d be running flat out for that servo and jumping in the first car is saw!

    Floor it, you bastard!

    • xiphos0311 says :

      One time on a business trip to Africa I saw a Hippo take out a canoe full of locals. it wasn’t pretty. Those beasts are dangerous as hell even more so in water then on land.

      • Droid says :

        Yeah, I’ve heard they are nasty bastards. That’s why I liked that photo. The thought of being chased down the street by a lumbering beast intent on gobbling you whole is pretty frightening. But in this case it’s not me, so it’s funny.

      • Droid says :

        being chased down the street by a lumbering beast intent on gobbling you whole

        Funnily enough, that’s what Jarv considers a first date.

      • xiphos0311 says :

        The weird part of the deal is that hippos aren’t even carnivores they are strictly herbivores as far as I know, but they have huge teeth and a massive psi bite radius.

      • Droid says :

        More of those hippo pics

      • Jarv says :

        Funnily enough, that’s what Jarv considers a first date.

        Says the man that considers Rohypnol to be the greatest gift to his love life ever.

      • Jarv says :

        Oh, and looking at those links-

        I always knew you were a blue-rinsed daily mail reading fat neo fascist cunt.

      • Droid says :

        Nope. I’m a googling neo fascist cunt.

        You gotta admit, those pics are amusing.

      • koutchboom says :

        Hippo Attack in Congo, probably top ten nay top five animal attacks in film.

        I think thats a list that needs to be made.

      • Droid says :

        You should do that list, koutch.

  4. xiphos0311 says :

    I really dislike BB and the main reason is Christian Bale and I like the dude, even before it became fashionable. his Bruce Wayne left me cold and uninvolved and the story was sort of blah in my opinion.

    Memento is great the first time you watch but the nature of the movie it loses something on subsequent views but its still a solid movie.

    I’ve never seen any Harry Potter movies, nor Let The Right One In, Wonder Boys and Undertow. I can’t remember if I saw The Devil’s Backbone or not.

    CoM is okay in my opinion but nothing special. Estrada, the Proposition and The New World are excellent choices.

  5. Droid says :

    I’ll let you in on a little secret… the lines are just a shitload of underscores. But what they do is force the fucker to stay in the right format.

    Funny, because that’s what I liked about BB. I really liked the evolution of him becoming Batman. But if you dislike the character to begin with, then i can understand you preferring a movie where he plays second banana to the villian.

    As for Hulk, I’d rather not get into Hulk argument 6,829,836. I think everything that can be said, has been said. I’m all for leaving it at that.

  6. Continentalop says :

    First off: Hulk? No, really: Hulk!?!

  7. Continentalop says :

    Secondly, I agree with Xi there about BB. I prefer TDK, and even that has ton of flaws for the old comic book nerd in me. All the problems start with BB and the decision to make Batman more ‘human’, i.e. a whiny pussy. I see Bruce Wayne as this guy in total control, a man of singular purpose and dedication. They have Bale (and otherwise fine actor who I would have loved to see star in the Star Wars prequels as Annakin Skywalker and in Gangs of New York) play him as a young man torn between going to college to become a doctor or follow his first love, the theatre.

    • Droid says :

      Bale as Annakin? No way, jose. Next you’re going to suggest Samuel L. Jackson as a jedi!

      I reckon Ryan Phillipe would’ve been aight.

      • Continentalop says :

        There is one thing Bale can really do awesome, and that is play self-righteous, self-obsessed characters who radiate menance and charm (ok, that is more than one thing). The prequels came out around or after Shaft, American Psycho & Equilibruim. Bale could have nailed a young Jedi who is slowly losing his soul.

      • koutchboom says :

        Droid, Continentalop has this like god like view of Batman. While most of just go to the basic Catholic School of Batman. Continentalop preaches at the Evangelical Mega Mega Uber Mormon Religious Church of Batman.

        In trying to find the name of some super religious church I came across this:


        WHAT THE FUCK! And droid its nothing bad, its just SO odd.

      • Droid says :

        Poor old Mario. What did he ever do to anyone except maybe Bowzer?

      • Bartleby says :

        Landover Baptist is a satirical site, Koutch. Not real, as far as I know, but whomever made it either has had some unfortunate experiences with the religious right or they are just really, really angry. Maybe both.

      • Bartleby says :

        one of my fave bits from the site:

        “Of course unicorns are real; it says so right in the Bible. Not only are they real, but their very existence proves the lies and slander of evolutionists. If they’re as smart as they claim they are; how come they’ve never found any unicorn bones?”

      • koutchboom says :

        Yeah Bart, Danny and I figured that out yesterday, felt pretty stoopid afterward. It looks so real at first. I started to think something was up when I realized they only had a thread not a real web site. I hate threads like that though.

  8. Continentalop says :

    Also, can I add: the Hulk? I mean, Jesus Christ.

  9. Continentalop says :

    Memento, however, is an incredibly awesome movie. Nolan’s best movie to date by far.

  10. lord bronco says :

    Kate Freaking Hudson…*sighs*, if I had to go blonde, I’m sure you could do worse…

  11. Jarv says :

    80% of a sack of shit is what it is.


  12. Jarv says :

    Aside from that weird mental aberration, this is a good list- and many of them could easily have made the top 20.

    • Droid says :

      Yeah, these were all vying for the Top 20. I’ve been thinking about this list and I think the reason they didn’t make it is because most of them are damn depressing.

      My Top 20 is much sunnier.

  13. Droid says :

    Jarv, does the formatting on your screen have a single line seperating the flicks, or do some have double lines? Cause on my laptop at home I formatted them for single lines, but now here at work some are double. Annoying.

  14. Jarv says :

    No- but I don’t have any of the formatting problems you lot seem to have. That’s why I think I should do the refit- because what I do actually turns up on screen.

    I wonder why that is.

  15. Jarv says :

    I’m on the piss from Midday- so I’ve posted my next “best of installment now”.

  16. Jarv says :

    I know. I just felt that it was worth pointing out again that while you are sitting in your veal fattening pen developing melanoma from the strip lighting pretending to work, I shall be getting drunk.

  17. Continentalop says :

    I agree that the original Insomia was much better, but I think the remake is very underestimated. And it is probably Al Pacino last good performance (same with Williams).

  18. Continentalop says :

    Don’t worry I’m just teasing. You started out being defensive about the Hulk I thought I would throw on a little gasoline.

  19. Jarv says :

    He’s defensive about it because he secretly knows that it’s wank but he’s too much of a stubborn convict to admit it.

  20. xiphos0311 says :

    boys BOYS! let’s stop this silly arguments and talk about something cool, like Hippos or Way of the Gun the last good thing James Caan has been in.

  21. xiphos0311 says :

    Congo! another kick ass movie.

      • Tom_Bando says :

        I actually got to see Laura Linney in person not horribly long ago. She’s very cool. Anyone who makes a movie playing Joe Don Baker’s daughter in law while fighting people in ape suits and watching Tim Curry’s RoooMaynian nutcase chew the scenary–gets a medal.

        Plus she reprogrammed the Giant Robot Lion’s invisibility cloaks quite well. You’d never see it.

  22. Droid says :

    We’re going to need to gather up all these Top whatever lists and put them somewhere. Theres some good work being done by everyone.

    • Jarv says :

      Yes- I agree. I think we put them as a child page under “Gospel of Chang” and call it “The Lists” or something like that.

  23. Jarv says :

    Cool fact about Way of The Gun.

    When they’re in the car, McQuarrie “outed” Singer on a fake radio broadcast.

  24. Droid says :

    We are nearing a milestone, fellas!

    Walter Chang has nearly been worshipped 15,000 times!


  25. just pillow talk says :

    Hmmm…I haven’t seen like half those movies. Quite an “unique” list. The fucking Hulk? Aw forget it.

    Good to see The Devil’s Backbone on your list. I think that movie was great. I do think I prefer The Orphanage though. I think the chick does a good job in that one.

    • Droid says :

      Pillows, I was very disappointed by The Orphanage. I didn’t get into it at all, and I was hoping for another TDB. Alas, it is not.

      Hulk rules!

  26. Bartleby says :


    Screw the list, that hippo pic is the funniest damn thing I’ve seen. I want an entire article based around the hippo pictures…

    BUT…since you did write a list, I should prob comment huh? Great stuff actually. You managed a feat by making a list that I actually like nearly every movie of. The only exception is The Proposition, and thats because it just went too brutal for me in the end. I can, however, understand how it makes a list of near misses.

    Special mention should be made of Knowing and Three Burials of Erika Estrada. Those are both terrific movies and they are often overlooked. Frailty and Devil’s Backbone are both on my horror list. Igby and Wonderboys both fine, if just a tad too precious. Hulk is honestly much closer to the feel of the comics than the remake. Yea, that Akira-esque Eastern ending is a bit off it’s rocker, but Hulk had the never to be original. I like it quite a bit. I’m behind ya on that one.

    Bourne, Way of the Gun and Team America were all one-shot watches for me. Almost Famous is sort of like cinematic comfort food and Im not entirely sure why.

    Yea, great list. With all the good here though, what did you put in the top 20?

    • Droid says :

      I know! I chuckled to myself for ages when I first saw it. It’s gold.

      Cheers. I’m pretty happy with the list, and they all have Top 20 merit.

      aaaah! I think my Top 20 might cop a bit of flack from some folk, but fuck em. It’s my list, not theirs.

      At last! Some Hulk support! I’m not the lone voice of reason.

  27. Bartleby says :

    the never? that should be nerve..

  28. Bartleby says :

    Droid, did you see the first part of the animated list over at my place? I got backed up with real work yesterday and didnt get anything written yesterday. Hope to get the first part out today.

  29. Bartleby says :

    japanimation…it’s been awhile since I have heard it called that. I remember when the Sci-Fi Channel used to have ‘Japanimation Weekend’.

  30. koutchboom says :

    Sweet, Igby fan? Never knew. I really like that movie.

    Could give fuck all about Almost Famous.

    Also good call about Harry Potter 3. I’ve kind of lumped them all into one movie, that one truely is the only stand out. 1-2 are the same 4-6 (though not having seen 6) are the same. 3 is the only one with it’s own sence of style. Also I think its the only one thats remotely scary or dark. 4-5 are too lame to be scary or dark.

    • Droid says :

      Yeah, Igby’s a great flick.

      The dementors in HP3 are pretty scary.

      • koutchboom says :

        Yeah I felt a real sense of dread in 3, because they didn’t fully know the spells and shit yet. Plus nothing is scarier then Oldman in full crazy mode. At the end when you find out he’s nice you are like….lame. Then Finnes in 4-5 just as this sort of mean looking guy isn’t scary. The kids are too cocky and confident, plus that fucking ginger just ruins it. Who decided that he was funny? Because they were wrong.

      • Droid says :

        You really dislike poor Ron don’t ya? C’mon, the poor bloodnut bastards fucked up enough without you laying in to him.

      • koutchboom says :

        Yeah then you realize that the little fucker had more money then either you or I will see in our lifetime, before the age of 20. Fuck him, he can take everything.

      • Droid says :

        Would you be sell yourself to the bloodnut devil for that kind of cash?

      • koutchboom says :

        If it meant I had to be a ginger the rest of my life……no.

      • Droid says :


  31. koutchboom says :

    Also I dig the layout, did you use something else outside of wordpress? That thing you lot were talking about yesterday?

  32. ThereWolf says :

    Really good list, Droid. Nice layout. I don’t know what ‘Live Writer’ is, I’ve only just got me head around the basics of the WordPress one so I’m sticking to what I know for now.

    Nothing against Le Hoh-Hee-Hoh Hulk either. And you can “crap” on about Children Of Men for as long as you like – I’ll listen. I want to see Devil’s Backbone & I’ve just bought Knowing on Blu-ray to watch over Christmas. Nice to see Frailty on there too.

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